Dexter and Alessandrina

The Incomplete Survival Response: How Your Nervous System Holds Both the Wound and the Healing

Anxiety and stress often get framed as obstacles to overcome, something to push away and make smaller, and are seen as 'bad' like it shouldn't be happening. But held within those symptoms that are intelligent responses from your nervous system to keep you safe is the very energy and life force your nervous system genuinely needs for transformation.

Peter Levine understood this at a cellular level. The very activation we experience in our bodies contains the energy and resources necessary to complete the journey back to safety and regulation. Symptoms aren't a problem to fix and get rid of. They're a messenger carrying something vital about what needs to happen next for us to return to safety and homeostasis.

When the nervous system has been stuck in sympathetic arousal or dorsal vagal shutdown, it's because some instinctive response was interrupted or thwarted. The body holds onto that incomplete gesture, that unexpressed movement, that survival energy that never finished what it needed to do.

As we create the conditions for genuine safety and learn to work with what's alive in our bodies, something shifts inside of us. Those thwarted instincts get space to express themselves. That held energy moves and discharges. Once the stress loop completes, the nervous system naturally settles into the resourcefulness of ventral vagal presence where real healing and rest take root.

We're never separate from our solutions. We're woven together with them. When we approach what's happening in our bodies with curiosity and compassion instead of fear and resistance, we access the very resources necessary for transformation. The healing we seek is already held within us, waiting for the conditions to unfold.

#PeterLevine #SomaticExperiencing #TraumaHealing #NervousSystemHealing #PolyvagalTheory #VentralVagal #SympthomsAsMessengers #BodyIntelligence #NervousSystemRegulation #TraumaRecovery #SomaticPractice #HealingFromWithin #NervousSystemScience #TherapeuticHealing #MindBodyHealing

1 week ago | [YT] | 8

Dexter and Alessandrina

What We Don't See: Understanding The Landscape of Painful Emotions

When we become identified with our painful emotions, we're often only looking at the tip of an iceberg. Beneath the surface expression lives a complex cascade of physical sensations, emotional undercurrents, and protective strategies the nervous system has learned to deploy in order to keep us safe.

Anxiety usually shows up as tightness in your chest, restlessness you can't shake, a heartbeat that won't slow down, and thoughts that keep circling back to what could go wrong as our nervous system gets stuck looking for cues of danger that only revalidate a sense of not being safe.

What we call "lashing out" or "shutting down" are manifestations of our body's genuine attempt to manage an internal storm that others cannot see.

When we can pause and turn our attention inward without rushing to fix or dismiss what we find there, something shifts. The act of simply noticing what's happening underneath, the fear, the shame, the ache of feeling alone, creates space where healing becomes possible.

Meeting ourselves with the same curiosity and gentleness we might offer a frightened child allows the feelings to exist and move through us. In this presence, we begin to understand the wisdom of our own nervous system and the protective intelligence that once served us, even when it now creates suffering. Underneath every defensive reaction lives a part of us trying to keep us safe. Developing an authentic and caring relationship with that part of us, recognizing its good intentions, and holding genuine gratitude for how hard it has worked to protect us is where true healing begins.

#MentalHealthAwareness #AnxietySupport #MindfulLiving #EmotionalIntelligence #NervousSystemHealing #SelfCompassion #MentalWellness #InnerWork #AnxietyIsReal #MentalHealthMatters #HealingJourney #YoureNotAlone

2 weeks ago | [YT] | 5

Dexter and Alessandrina

Your nervous system holds the thought patterns your mind can't let go of. The thought you've thought a thousand times carves itself into your posture, in how your jaw tightens, and your breath becomes more shallow as a habitual holding pattern. Over time, this becomes invisible to you because you live inside it. The pattern becomes your baseline and how you know yourself. You stop noticing that your shoulders live near your ears, that your belly stays braced, that there's little ease inside of a guarded and protected frame.

Bonnie Bainbridge Cohen emphasized that the body doesn't just express the mind's patterns, it sustains them. Your held tension is both an effect of how you think and the mechanism that keeps those thoughts alive. The two feed each other. If you attempt to change the thought alone, the body almost instantly pulls you back toward the familiar grip. This is why intellectual awareness without integration through embodiment can't fundamentally shift what remains held and stuck inside us.

Dan Siegel's research shows us that implicit memory, the body's learning, doesn't respond to reason. It responds to integration, to the nervous system's felt experience of safety. When you bring attention into the place where you're holding, when you find the actual sensation and holding pattern in the shape your body takes beneath the story, your neural pathways reorganize. The scattered fragments of old protection patterns find coherence and the brain reorganizes into greater coherence. And what was fragmented and unconscious becomes whole.

Your body is your record keeper, the guardian of the survival patterns that once kept you safe and alive. Attention here, the kind that is curious and kind toward what you've been protecting, moves you toward genuine freedom.

#BodyMindCentering #EmbodiedAwareness #SomaticWisdom #InterpersonalNeurobiology #HealingThroughMovement #BodyMemory #EmbodiedPattern #NeuralIntegration #SomaticHealing #MindBodyConnection #BonnieBainbridgeCohen #DanSiegel #InterpersonalBiology

2 weeks ago | [YT] | 8

Dexter and Alessandrina

I spent years working with breath and movement to regulate my nervous system, unkowingly missing the most direct pathway available: the vagus nerve itself, accessible through intentional touch at specific points on your face, neck, and chest.

Direct neuromodulation is different from other regulation practices because you're not working indirectly through signals. You're accessing the vagus nerve directly through massage and pressure where it runs close to the surface, creating immediate measurable changes in autonomic tone.

In this post, I share the facial and vagal massage techniques that have become fundamental parts of my daily practice, including the neuroscience behind why they’re so effective, specific access points on your body, and how to build a consistent neuromodulation practice that expands your window of tolerance over time.

Neuromodulation will help you partner with your nervous system through direct engagement, supporting its natural movement toward regulation through the pathways that have been there your entire life, waiting for your loving attention and care.

Link in bio on Instagram, scan the QR code on the image, or use this link:
restplaylove.com/post/Neuromodulation-Through-Touc…
🤍

#nervousgystemregulation #vagusnerve #neuromodulation #somatichealing #traumarecovery #polyvagaltheory #vagalstimulation #nervoussystemhealing #embodiedhealing #facialmassage #parasympatheticnervoussystem #traumainformedcare #somaticpractices #windowoftolerance #autonomicnervoussystem #bodybasedhealing #regulationtools #vagaltone #nervousgystemtools #healingtrauma

4 weeks ago | [YT] | 6

Dexter and Alessandrina

How Presence Teaches Presence: The Neuroscience of Co-Regulation

How Connection Shapes the Nervous System

Your nervous system doesn't respond to words. It responds to presence.

You cannot think your way into feeling safe or use logic to force yourself out of anxiety. The part of your brain that registers safety operates beneath language. It responds to what it senses in the bodies around it through a process called neuroception.

This is co-regulation. One nervous system lending its calm to another, creating the conditions where healing becomes possible. Not through advice or solutions, but through regulated presence.

If you grew up around chronic stress, your body learned dysregulation the same way through repeated experience. Your hypervigilance wasn't a flaw. It was a brilliant adaptation to your environment.

The wonderful news is that it can be rewired.

Through therapy or coaching, somatic practices, and being in the presence of people whose nervous systems are steadier than yours. Through thousands of small moments where your body learns that safety is possible and that connection can be safe.

This is how regulation spreads. One nervous system at a time, learning safety through the lived experience of being near someone who models and embodies it.

Your regulated presence is not just a gift to others. It's proof that you’ve become the safe person your nervous system needed all along.

Read the full post to understand how co-regulation works and why your presence matters more than your words ever could. Link in bio on Instagram, or scan the QR code, or use this link: restplaylove.com/post/The-Neuroscience-of-coregula…

#nervousystemhealing #coregulation #polyvagaltheory #traumahealing #somatichealing #traumainformed #nervoussystemregulation #attachmenttheory #healingtrauma #embodiment #ventralvagal #windowoftolerance #traumarecovery #somatictherapy #regulatednervoussystem #traumawork #healinginrelationship #neuroscience #mindbodyhealing #traumasurvivor #innerchildhealing #breathwork #polyvagal #somaticexperiencing #safetyfirst #nervoussystem #mentalhealthawareness #healingjourney #regulationskills #attachmenthealing

4 weeks ago | [YT] | 8

Dexter and Alessandrina

What if this year didn’t ask you to become someone else, but invited you to come home to yourself and love yourself more?

This kind of quiet transformation doesn’t rely on affirmations or the performance of calm, but opens into a gentle, embodied practice of meeting yourself in the moments you are dysregulated, overwhelmed, shut down, or doing your best to navigate the state you are in without abandoning yourself.

The reflections in this blog post offer a pathway into a form of self-love that your nervous system can feel and recognize, one that listens to internal signals rather than overriding them and creates inner safety through attunement and care rather than pressure or force.

If you’ve been living inside patterns of protection, performance, or constant pushing through, this is an invitation to soften your grip and consider what becomes possible when you stop trying to regulate yourself into a different version of who you are.

You can read the full blog post using this link: restplaylove.com/post/new-year-resolutions-changin…, scan the QR code on the image, or click on the link in the bio if on Instagram.

#nervoussystemregulation
#cominghometoyourself
#traumainformed
#embodiedhealing
#selfregulation
#gentleselflove
#somaticwisdom
#healingwithoutforce
#windowoftolerance
#restorativepresence
#beautifulhuman

1 month ago | [YT] | 4

Dexter and Alessandrina

A fresh start in 2026...

I've been thinking about how our brains are already writing the script for next year and how that's always happening in the background when we default to old ways of thinking and being. The default mode network runs constantly in the background, narrating your life based on what's already happened. It's efficient, but it also keeps you recreating the same patterns, the same responses, the same version of yourself unless you intentionally become aware of it and choose to interrupt it.

Creating new neural pathways isn't a process of positive thinking or vision boards (though a good vision board is also a very effective tool for rewiring the brain and manifesting our intentions). Laying down new neural pathways requires you repeatedly directing your attention toward who you're becoming, not who you've been. Your brain literally rewires based on where you place your focus and attention.

When you imagine yourself in 2026, what does that version of you feel like in your body? Not just what you're doing or achieving, but how you're showing up and how that feels. What's different in the way you breathe? The way you move through a room? The way you respond when life challenges you?

What if you gave yourself permission to be curious about that new person you wish to become? To practice being this new you, even just for a few minutes a day?

You don't close the gap between who you are now and who you're becoming by force. You close it by where you choose to place your attention, through repetition, and with your gentle and unwavering insistence that something new is possible for you in the future, a future that is created with every thought and action you choose from moment to moment.

In recreating yourself, you don't have to have it all figured out right now. You just have to be willing to look forward with intention and envision the potential you wish to harness.

How do you envision recreating yourself in 2026?

#2026vision #neuroscience #neuroplasticity #defaultmodenetwork #freshstart #intentionalliving #mindfulness #personalgrowth #transformation #selfawareness #embodiment #brainscience #healing #evolving #newyou #newyearresolution #2026

1 month ago | [YT] | 7

Dexter and Alessandrina

The holidays carry their own particular pressures. The pace quickens, expectations layer on top of what you were already handling, and your body absorbs the collective intensity while you're doing your best to stay present and connected.

If you've noticed yourself feeling stretched thin, reactive, or running on fumes, that's your nervous system signaling it needs more support than it's currently receiving.

I'm sharing a few resources that might help:

🎧 A guided meditation using heart-brain coherence for when the holiday intensity is landing hard in your system (Youtube channel link in bio: https://youtu.be/QLzR5-D55cM)

📝 The self-regulation tools I use most when my nervous system needs support (practical, body-based practices for real-time moments) (blog link also in bio: restplaylove.com/post/my-favorite-self-regulation-…)

💙 The Beautifully Regulated Package: 3 sessions of deep somatic and nervous system work to help you shift out of stress patterns and into a steadier, more restful rhythm. 20% off through the end of the year with code GENTLEHOLIDAY20 (Session scheduling link in bio: restplaylove.com/services)

You don't need to wait until everything starts to settle to tend to what your body is asking for. You can begin exactly where you are right now.

Links in bio, or message me with questions about what might support you right now.

#nervousystemregulation #somatichealing #burnoutrecovery #traumahealing #embodiment #selfregulation #nervousystemsupport #polyvagaltheory #HSP #ADHDsupport #traumainformed #somaticwork #restplaylove #beautifulhumanhealing

1 month ago | [YT] | 2

Dexter and Alessandrina

After decades of working with my own nervous system and supporting others in their regulation practice, I've gathered a collection of tools and techniques that have genuinely changed how I meet myself in dysregulation.

These aren't generic techniques I think should work. They're the practices that have actually brought me back when anxiety has my heart racing, when every part of me wanted to shut down in difficult conversations, or when I realized I'd been dissociated for hours without knowing it.

In this post, I'm sharing the tools I return to most: voo breathing for when I need to shift my state without forcing anything, body scans with pendulation that taught me my body isn't just one experience of pain, humming that works when nothing else does, shaking to discharge activation, cold water for shutdown, naming what's happening in relationships so I don't react and spin out of control, and the micro-moments of presence that make consistent nervous system care possible.

Your nervous system is different from mine. What regulates me might activate you. But I'm sharing these in hope that something here resonates with you and gives you a new way to meet yourself and come back home to regulation in your own timing.

Link in bio to read the full post on Instagram or simply scan the QR code.
:
#selfregulation #nervoussystemhealing #somatichealing #polyvagaltheory #traumahealing #embodiedhealing #nervoussystemregulation #traumarecovery #somaticpractices #vagusnerve #windowoftolerance #nervoussystempractices #regulationtools #breathwork #bodyawareness #healingtrauma #somaticexperiencing #nervousystemcare

1 month ago | [YT] | 4

Dexter and Alessandrina

As the year comes to a close, I find myself reflecting and feeling deeply grateful for the humans who show up with care, presence, and tenderness, especially in seasons that ask more of us than we expected.

This message is a very small offering of appreciation, a pause to acknowledge the quiet ways we support one another, the love that is felt even beneath words, and the healing that happens in conscious and loving relationship.

From us at Beautiful Human, thank you for being here, for walking alongside us, and for being part of a community rooted in gentleness, connection, and humanity and for supporting and spreading our common message into the world. Every single one of your comments and donations on our meditations deeply touches and warms our heart.

Wishing you a season of rest, warmth, and moments that feel like coming home.

Happy Holidays 🤍

#BeautifulHuman
#HappyHolidays
#SeasonOfRest
#GentleLiving
#NervousSystemCare
#EmbodiedHealing
#TraumaInformed
#PresenceOverPerfection
#SlowDownSeason
#GratitudePractice
#CommunityCare
#HumanConnection

1 month ago | [YT] | 5