Full Name: Mr. Ted Suzan
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Classification: Absurdist Inventor, philosopher, author, artist, songwriter, and intellectual.
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Perhaps you would like to wear one of my inventions, the meat calculator:

www.cafepress.com/TedSuzan
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Reviews from popular youtubers:

"You're funny dude!" -LisaNova (on my blowdry tongue vid)

"What color are the aliens chemicals? Love you."-Shaye St. John (my hero)

"Amazing skillz with a blow dryer"-Spricket24

"You have a very unique and sometimes hilarious style"-ReinaDelCid
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Ted Suzan is a hyperactive 8 year old who can slowly and rationally explain his excitement...Roasted Mouse Towels!