“I am the King!”

“Any man who must say I am the king is no true king.”

“If there’s a madman on the throne, it’s because you put him there.”

“You didn’t tell me he’d gone this crazy.” “He’s really stepped it up a notch.”

“I will make it legal.”

“Is that legal?”

(Cat got your tongue)

“The whole time? The whole time you were… THE WHOLE TME?!”

“Why do I have to waste my time outwitting morons?”

“I am ‘traught, ‘whelmed, and feeling the ‘aster.”

“Eeeek!”

“Like Christmas, but with more…. me.”

“Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!” (Bigfoot Laugh)

“Where’s the kaboom? There was supposed to be an earth shattering kaboom.”

“Ah, my public. How they love me.”

(Waking up)

(Bat Shadow Puppet)

(Bats!)

“Children of the night. What a mess they make.”

“What do trees have to talk about? Except the consistency of squirrel droppings.”

“Talking trees. What do trees have to talk about? Except the consistency of squirrel droppings.”

“Now that’s comedy!”

“Bad baby!”

(Writing)

“All hogs on deck! All hogs on deck! Sooie ! Pig! Pig! Pig!”

“Aaaaaahhhhh!”

(Slurping soda) (Talos)

“Why can’t you learn to hate each other in secret? Like girls do.”

“Why You Ackin’ So Cray-Cray? will be back in a moment.”

“Me! Me!! Me!!!”

“Billions and billions of wabbits!”

(Angry monkey point)

“You ever stood and just stared at it? Marveled at its beauty, its genius?”

“Billions of people just living out their lives. Oblivious.”

“The peak of your civilization…”

“As soon as we started thinking for you, it really became our civilization.”

“No wonder you mad.”

“Zog.”

“Zog? What do you mean ‘zog’? Zog what? Zog yes, zog no?”

“They understand our language, they’re just not willing to speak to us in it.”

“Who knew they were French?”

“If you value your lives, be somewhere else.”

“He is behind me. You are in front of me. If you value your lives, be somewhere else.”

“Only one human captain has ever survived battle with a Minbari fleet. He is behind me.”

“Call it a weakness.”

“Land!”

(Getting angry)

“Oooh, angrier! Oooh! That’s good, you’re scaring me!”

“You know what? Give me angry.” (2)

“You know what? Give me angry.”

“Too bad. So sad.”

“It is no laughing matter!”

“Do or do not. There is no try.”

“Luminous beings, are we. Not this crude matter.”

(What?!)

“Help. Help.”

“Naughty.”

“Quite naughty.”

“Shut the front door!”

“It's not that bad.”