Elena Kundro

🧘‍♀️ When I walked out of my first 10-day silent retreat, I felt peace like never before.
I thought: “This is it. I’ve figured out life for good.”

But then I got home… and within days, I collapsed — back to quick dopamine hits and old habits.

👉 That’s because the peace wasn’t integrated. And no matter how much I meditated after, I couldn’t reach that same deep stillness.

What I came to realize was this:

During the retreat, my protective parts softened.
They stepped aside to let my True Self — that calm, loving inner awareness — emerge.
But once I re-entered the chaos of life, those protectors rushed back in.

And I didn’t yet know how to meet them with love.

🔁 That’s why meditation alone wasn’t enough for me.

What was missing?

A trauma-informed lens.

When anger came up, I was told: “Don’t engage. Just observe.”
But what I really needed was someone to say:
“Observe it with love. Ask what it needs. See if it has a message.”

That’s where Internal Family Systems (IFS) and Somatic Experiencing (SE) changed everything.

➡️ In IFS, we don’t push parts away — we build compassionate relationships with them.
We understand their roles and help them unburden, so healing carries into daily life.

➡️ In SE, we don’t just notice sensations — we let the body complete what got stuck.
Without needing to attach stories or fix anything.

➡️ In Vipassana, we cultivate awareness — but without context, that awareness can easily become a bypass.
Now I still meditate — but I do it with my parts.

I listen. I get curious. I let them speak.

And once they feel seen, peace returns… and this time, it stays — because it’s embodied.
Even though in theory Vipassana must stand alone, I no longer see it that way.

✨ Awareness + compassion + embodiment = lasting transformation.

They’re not in competition.

They’re puzzle pieces. And together — they make healing whole.

If you’ve ever felt confused after meditating — like you touched something beautiful but lost it again —
You didn’t do anything wrong.
You just needed the integration.

More about this in my latest YouTube video.

6 months ago | [YT] | 2

Elena Kundro

🌀 I didn’t realize I was using spirituality to avoid my emotions…

but I was.

✨ Lesson 2 of 12 things I’ve learned in 12+ years of inner work

🕊️ In the beginning, spirituality was my shield.

I told myself my father’s abuse was a soul agreement.

That he loved me on some higher plane.

That if I just meditated, visualized, and stayed “high vibe,”

I wouldn’t have to feel the pain.

🌞 And for a while, it worked.

I felt powerful, in control.

Waking up at 5 AM, doing yoga, visualisations, focusing on light and love.

I even told myself, “My childhood didn’t really affect me that much.”

🌑 But underneath—I felt deeply alone.

Eventually I realized…

I wasn’t healing.

I was bypassing.

Using spirituality to avoid the parts of me that needed to be felt, held, and seen.

🌿 I’m still grateful for those teachings.

They got me through the darkest moments.

But true healing began when I stopped escaping my pain

and finally turned toward it.

📝 Reflection prompts:

- Are there any spiritual beliefs you’re using to avoid discomfort?
- What happens when you stop trying to reframe… and just *feel*?

🎥 I made a YouTube playlist with all 12 lessons.

9 months ago | [YT] | 4