The Onion

Pentagon Blames Venezuela For Flow Of Drugs Into Kash Patel theonion.com/pentagon-blames-venezuela-for-flow-of…

5 days ago | [YT] | 47,413



@nlllstmbcc4079

the fentagon

5 days ago | 2,500

@OmgThisGuy

I can't even tell what's satire anymore with this administration...

5 days ago | 2,700

@jaykarimi7123

I heard the real war is between Kash's left and right eyeballs. 😮

5 days ago | 1,800

@ItsB3enLikeThis

He constantly looks like he's geeked out of his mind lol

5 days ago | 329

@SallyNicoleSmith

Kash and Don Jr love hitting them bumps together.

5 days ago | 328

@AvidCat5000

This explains his constant "Deer in the Headlights" look.

5 days ago | 436

@omghowcueify

I suspect the Onion has some monkeys paw curse to make amazing satire but it starts to become true.

5 days ago | 483

@ChilleBruh

Onion Writers Struggle ”You Try Making An Unbelievable Headline These Days”

5 days ago | 1,000

@ryanh3176

He’s got the crazy eyes. Reminds me of myself after a weekend bender.

5 days ago | 219

@comanchio1976

People are just jealous because his eyes can multitask

5 days ago | 89

@barbarauridge1575

Patel permanently looks like someone is giving him an enema

4 days ago | 25

@tom-kz9pb

That's not fair. Kash Patel's wild, crazy eyes may simply be the result of deep mental disturbance, not necessarily meaning that he is a drug user.

5 days ago (edited) | 78

@jasonolszanicky4035

Kash is powered by Coco leaves

5 days ago | 185

@saeedhossain6099

kash's mossad handler girlfriend got that 8ball and speed dosage just right. allegedly

5 days ago (edited) | 62

@martinlancaster6282

Kash left eye - looking for a bag Kash right eye - looking at venuzula

5 days ago | 38

@pxrays547

Kash will keep an eye on this issue.

5 days ago | 40

@codenamexeno6595

My favorite type of Onion articles are the ones where I forget Im reading the Onion and I think its a real headline

5 days ago | 26

@stephengordon4081

trump pays drug cartel's to legally import illegal drugs

5 days ago | 34

@friedlegs7411

The onion has routinely made me double take a headline because it’s outlandish but not too outlandish for this timeline

4 days ago | 19

@daniellewieners7179

Cash Patel always looks like he's just seen the Eipstein files lmfaoo 💀

2 days ago | 1