As an INFJ, I need to remind myself of this and not take personally the rude things some people do or say. As you say, it's their issue not mine. And also understand that not everyone is going to like me, but that's ok too. Still learning to deal with these things better, it's a work in progress. I'm proud AF to be one of the 2%'ers though!
2 months ago (edited) | 9
The one thing I really am working on is not reacting. Sometimes I slip up but I can honestly say it is much better. The INFJ rage is real when my boundaries are crossed. It is now a rare occurrence and I just hand the other party a tissue for their tears.
2 months ago | 7
True. You are not responsible for other peoples actions and other peoples actions say nothing about you , it's how you deal with it that says everything about you .
2 months ago | 2
It's incredibly important to understand reciprocity as an INFJ. We are sometimes a little too willing to offer support which can blur the lines a tad for us, and having the ability to empathise with how others see the world, and what they expect of us also does the same. I have a sticky note on my desk saying 'You do not owe anybody anything; rudeness will not be tolerated'. It's telling that I need to be reminded that just because I can understand what another expects of me and their whole world-view of which I can also understand backing that up (albeit hugely flawed), is not the same thing as them actually deserving of it. Seeing how they see can feel like a curse. I find it so difficult to explain back to people why they might be wrong to assume what I should be putting out there for them, and that I have to do that, is only because they are ever so willing to cross my boundaries in the first place; something I would never do, and only feel forced to have to explain what I see as obvious after the fact. Seeing everything all of the time makes it feel incredibly overwhelming to unpack all of this to a boundary crosser, whilst at the same time 'seeing' where they are coming from in why they have made an error in their assumption. I thus often do not react. It's just the best thing to do for INFJ types. Its important I remind myself, as my sticker note says 'rudeness will not be tolerated'.
2 months ago | 6
Thanks mane I'm not here to be understood I'm here to stand in my own light
2 months ago (edited) | 6
I'm not handling the disappointment of the divide well this weekend. When I heard people cheering and clapping that I had trusted to be compassionate celebrating murder, I kind of lost my s***. I didn't tell them off wholesale or get angry but I definitely made my point clear. My intuition is telling me we are in danger and according to my pattern recognition, it's only going to get worse. I am deeply disappointed not to mention a little bit frustrated. It feels like living in bizarro world!
2 months ago | 9
My psychotherapist was rude to me and I felt sad and let down....I still do. I didnt know I was an infj when I went to see him for health anxiety. I was talking to him and then looked at his eyes and I knew what he was feeling. It was awkward and I looked away but I did see the shocked look on his face. The next visit was horrible as he was cold and quite nasty. Never went back🙁
2 months ago | 1
Pretty timely when you get blindsided for just making a person a pie...details not necessary 😂
2 months ago | 1
Yes and don’t gas light yourself. Label that shit, trust it and call it out.
2 months ago | 3
Thanks for this, Jay. I care a lot about people and they feel/think I'm being too much. I care less and they think I'm indifferent and selfish. I dunno where I stand sometimes so I stay out of people's radar. The tips help me a lot. Looking forward to more episodes on your podcast. ☺️ Have a good one, Jay! 🤘
2 months ago | 2
The INFJ Circle
3 Quick Tips for INFJs When Others Are Rude To You
1. Remember the source — cruel words usually reflect their wounds, not your worth. In other words, their problem, not yours.
2. They don't deserve a reaction — dignity in the face of insult is a superpower; but be sure to put them in the “rude person” box, so you can keep your distance in the future.
3. Recenter yourself — remind yourself: “Their opinion doesn’t define me. My actions and heart define me.”
If you need some extra support this weekend, that’s exactly why I wrote my ebook INFJ Unlocked. You can check it out here: book.theinfjcircle.com/
2 months ago | [YT] | 510