22nd place man Vasil

THE 67 JOKE STORY - THE FATHERS' SURPRISE PARTY

ACT I – The Match Nobody Expected

(2011. Ta’ Qali Stadium changing room. Noise of cheering in the distance.)

Kurt (jumping around): Melaaaa! Did you see me? I ran like a rabbit being chased by a pastizz!

Matthew (laughing): Calm down, clown. You nearly fell twice.

Kurt: That’s called technique, ħi. Advanced aerodynamics.

(Ira and Daphne run in excitedly.)

Ira: Kurt! That goal! Dak gowl! I screamed louder than my mum when she sees the electricity bill!

Kurt (posing heroically): Anything for you, sweetheart. Physics class finally paid off.

Matthew: Physics!? Kurt, all you did was drop a football from the top of the cupboard and yell, “Gravity, mela!”

Daphne (hugging Matthew): Still… intom żewġ bravi, mela.

(Coach Mike Micallef storms in.)

Mike: Boys! Historic win! Nobody expected this! Even the other coach already bought celebratory kannoli for himself. And now he’s eating them sadly in a corner like a penguin.

Kurt: Mr. Micallef, mela, we’re legends now.

Mike (grinning mischievously): Actually… I have a plan.

Lights fade.

ACT II – The Fathers’ Secret Mission

(Mike Micallef, William Borg and Joseph Spiteri plan a surprise in the garage. Tools, boxes, and a suspicious amount of balloons.)

Mike: Gentlemen… Joseph, William… welcome to “Operation Surprise.”

Joseph: I haven’t had a mission since I tried to assemble IKEA furniture. And that ended in tears.

William: Whose tears?

Joseph: All of ours. Even our cat Ġużi cried.

Mike: Look, mela, the boys deserve a celebration. And I realised something important. We’re all 53 this year.

William (shocked): Uwejja. All of us?

Joseph: Yes! We basically share warranty expiry date!

Mike: So tonight, we prepare a triple celebration — for the young champions AND for our blessed bones that still manage stairs.

Joseph: Brilliant! I brought sausage rolls.

William: I brought loudspeakers.

Mike: And I… booked the community centre. Let’s set it up before the kids arrive.

(The three fathers attempt decorations. Balloons pop. A banner falls on Joseph.)

Joseph (muffled under banner): Mela… this party wants to kill me.

ACT III – The Party Explosion

(Community centre decorated in a delightfully chaotic Maltese way. The fathers hide behind tables. Kurt, Matthew, Ira, and Daphne walk in confused.)

Kurt: Why is the door wide open? Mela did someone break in to steal the folding chairs?

Matthew: Or the bingo machine?

(Lights turn on. Fathers jump out.)

All fathers: SURPRISE!

Ira: Aww! So cute!

Daphne: This is adorable!

Kurt (hugs his dad): Pa! You organised this?

Joseph: We did. And listen, mela… We’re all 53. We deserve a festa as well.

Matthew: Congrats, boomers! Still standing strong!

(Suddenly the door flies open. The five teammates enter carrying mountains of ftiras and pastizzi.)

Keith: ATTENZJONI! The cavalry has arrived!

Mark: We brought ftiras biż-żejt, u pastizzi tal-irkotta, tal-piżelli, tal-everything!

Richard (stuffing his face): I’m carb-loading for tomorrow.

Andrew: Tomorrow we don’t have training.

Richard: I’m carb-loading for life, mela.

Chris (to Mike): Mr. Micallef! That match, we made history!

Mike: Yes, and now you will make history by eating all this food within ten minutes.

(Music starts — Maltese party classics. Everyone dances.)

Kurt (to Ira while dancing badly): You know I won because you were watching, right?

Ira: Kurt… you fell twice. And missed the ball once.

Kurt: Details, mela.

(Matthew dips Daphne dramatically. She squeals like she’s in a telenovela.)

Daphne: My hero!

Keith: Ara vera drama.

Joseph: Boys! Fathers’ announcement!

(The three dads stand together proudly.)

William: We, the three musketeers of 1958—

Joseph: —declare that although our knees sound like fireworks—

Mike: —we’re still the coolest dads in Malta, mela!

(Everyone cheers.)

Kurt: Mela, this is the best night ever.

Matthew: Ftira, football, girlfriends, and our insane dads. Perfect.

All together: Mela!

6 days ago | [YT] | 3