I am really sorry for what is happening.. and i hope everything gets well you know what. I will always be there for you no matter what if you hate me idc i will support you i hope things get well and be careful ❤️🙏
17 hours ago | 3
I am really sorry for what is happening.. and i hope everything gets well you know what. I will always be there for you no matter what if you hate me idc i will support you i hope things get well and be careful ❤️🙏
17 hours ago | 3
[🦋] 𝙳𝚎𝚗𝚗𝚒𝚜 •°.*
⚠️vent⚠️
I wish i was normal.
Like, im studying really hard for my exams bit nothing enters on my mind but it have too or i will lose another school year and my mom will kick me out of my house and break my phone into piece (yes she said that)
Its hard to me to focus on things and it is hard to me to i literally proof it to her and she says "you just want attention"
Yes i called the police on her, many times (2 or 3 times) and all they said to me is that i need to proof them with really good stuff.... how tf am i going to do that? Like when she do all of those shit that she does is something that just appears, had times that i was calling my friends and my mom was yelling at me so i have people that trust me (my 2 irl best friends)
Im planning to runaway from home, but idk if i take my irl lil brother with me (she is planning his future and forcing him to do it, like she did to me when i was at his age) but my mom is manipulating him...... my brother was gay and now he thinks that his a monster bc of her...... (my brother have 13, going to do 14 next week) and my brother doesnt understand that the monster is her and its ok to be gay bc he his being himself and he is discovering the world so its also normal to question himself about that
Also, my mom doesnt let me study, but she wants that i study. Lemme explain
So, i have things on my phone that i safed to i study not only for test but also for my exams, and they are helping me alot to i understand more the subjects that i have to learn, and i even ask for my teachers send me links, videos and/or powerpoints about the stuff that im having difficulties to understand so i can learn it.
But i say to my mom that i have those things on my phone and i EVEN SHOW TO HER.... she said "next time that i see you using your phone without studying, i swear to you that i will break it and you will get a new one if you got a REAL job, without those stupid shits of art stuff"
.....
Sometimes i just want to not exist anymore, one day i will have a mf burnout... im always tired and my body hurts for studying non stop and for my free space i do videos for you guys (bc i love you all sm) or i play avakin life for i talk and maybe vent to my friends
Ah! Also, my mom is almost prohibit me to not to go to theraphy...... the one that im paying with my own money and some of them are from hers, but mostly are mine... that money i got from selling my crochet plushies and people are loving my work (and im proud of myself for it)
....
Im not mentally ok.. im feeling useless not bc of all of this situation with my mom but also bc im not texting with no one of my online friends... sometimes on yt comments and thats all..... i love my friends.. they make me feel like... myself... they are everything for me..❤️
Im grateful for having them on my lifes but im afraid to lose them all.. some of them dont believe in me bc the situation is horrible asf... but believe it or not is truth, it really is...
Idk how many times that i sleep for 4-5 hours before school (or even lower), idk how many times that i didnt eat bc i feel ugly, bc of my dysphoria and bc of my mom (ofc that bitch), idk how many times that i cried when i find out that sometimes my mom steals from me (mostly money) and she acts like nothing happend.... idk how many times that i was sad this year.... and the other 4 before....
Ok i will stop talking bc i need to sleep (or try to) and its midnight now
Gn to everyone, i love you guys so much✨️❤️
18 hours ago | [YT] | 9