Is this happening? Because I've been very confused over the past few months when I'm trying to work on myself, after finally becoming self aware. She talks about men, but am I doing this too? I haven't started therapy yet. Only CoDA meetings. So do I have this pattern? I stopped dating for years, due to my own fear years ago that I might be capable of being the abusive one. And sure enough, I found out I am capable of this. I've gotten much better (recently) about not "looking for new supply" and trying to interact with the few men I still chat with on YT, as the human beings they are, instead of potential "love bombs". Apparently I only do that with folks who remind me of my father. That's my old father wound and trauma bond. But love bombing men and women online is not a regular pattern for me. They literally have to remind me of dad. I thought I was doing "better" since I was single for so long. But addiction has a way of creeping up on us and making us relapse even years after being emotionally "sober". And then we do it again, years later. That's what the CoDA meetings are helping me with. Recognizing the addictive patterns, not just what's related to my NPD issues. I think only therapy can help me with the other deeper issues, like the C-PTSD, etc. And then I'm bipolar to boot. My scrambled eggs brain is fun. 🙃 She is trying to help women but I'm wondering if I have these patterns too, due to my own control issues. Sara of Cluster B Milkshake is the only woman I can find on YT who's taking about how this manifests in women (as a narc herself) Most NPD videos focus on NPD abuse from men.
Narcissistic Miss So
Is this happening? Because I've been very confused over the past few months when I'm trying to work on myself, after finally becoming self aware. She talks about men, but am I doing this too? I haven't started therapy yet. Only CoDA meetings. So do I have this pattern? I stopped dating for years, due to my own fear years ago that I might be capable of being the abusive one. And sure enough, I found out I am capable of this. I've gotten much better (recently) about not "looking for new supply" and trying to interact with the few men I still chat with on YT, as the human beings they are, instead of potential "love bombs". Apparently I only do that with folks who remind me of my father. That's my old father wound and trauma bond. But love bombing men and women online is not a regular pattern for me. They literally have to remind me of dad. I thought I was doing "better" since I was single for so long. But addiction has a way of creeping up on us and making us relapse even years after being emotionally "sober". And then we do it again, years later. That's what the CoDA meetings are helping me with. Recognizing the addictive patterns, not just what's related to my NPD issues. I think only therapy can help me with the other deeper issues, like the C-PTSD, etc. And then I'm bipolar to boot. My scrambled eggs brain is fun. 🙃 She is trying to help women but I'm wondering if I have these patterns too, due to my own control issues. Sara of Cluster B Milkshake is the only woman I can find on YT who's taking about how this manifests in women (as a narc herself) Most NPD videos focus on NPD abuse from men.
https://youtu.be/e6Os6b03ND8?feature=...
1 month ago | [YT] | 1