I believe that because of this video I managed to clearly tap into some deep guttural feeling and had a conversation with my partner where she made room to understand me and I felt it got through. She has been making more effort to meet me in this emotional way. There are obstacles like our work schedules making it hard to spend time and connect like we used to. And she is making more effort to meet me halfway and I really couldn't ask for more. I also really appreciate her understanding my need for friends. I need friends and a partner. I know I can't expect all my needs to be met by one person. It is important for me to have some type of human connection during my days off because work can be so draining... and I need close people to help me feel balanced and like I exist somewhere. We all need a village. Because I don't exist at work hardly, like I don't fit in at all. And since I spend so much time at work it can really wear down on me and I literally wonder about the meaning of my existence. Thank you for this video and for sharing your story with the purple chair. It hit a cord. I needed that.
3 days ago | 0
Alan Robarge / Attachment Trauma Therapist
Ever looked at your partner and realized... you have no idea who you actually are anymore?
I filmed this one after thinking about my old purple chair story. It was the moment I understood I'd become a hollow shell in a relationship.
Honestly, it took me years to even recognize that pattern in myself. I was so good at disappearing into other people that I didn't notice the absence until I sat in that chair and felt... nothing. Just static where a self should have been. Ouch!
You can't be in a relationship if you don't have a sense of self.
Sometimes relationships bring more suffering than goodness.
Maybe in your relationships you're feeling more drained than filled, more lost than found. It's exhausting to keep showing up for something that's slowly erasing you.
If you've ever felt like a ghost in your own life, this one's for you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4dmRM...
1 week ago | [YT] | 20