(But why conditioning keeps people stuck buying it anyway)
When there’s money trauma these patterns will show up around luxury and self care purchases. These are subconscious patterns that can be re written to regulate the nervous system around money.
The patterns: The purchase wasn’t for pleasure it was for regulation.
It wasn’t: “I desire this.” It was: “I need something to make me feel OK right now.”
Self-care becomes soothing, numbing, escape, survival, proof of “deserving good things”….It’s the same energy as stress eating, impulse buying, or emotional spending..but disguised as “wellness.”
The body registers the transaction as: “I had to BUY safety.”
Which… never sticks.
The association of luxury with guilt, not nourishment.
So even when money is spent on something “special,” the nervous system goes into “I shouldn’t have spent that.”….Was that responsible?”…”What if something comes up?”….”I didn’t really deserve that.”…”Now I’m further behind.”
Pleasure cannot coexist with guilt. Full stop.
The body shuts down enjoyment to protect itself.
Overgiving → Overextending → Overspending
Looks like:
• rescue others • compensate emotionally with spending • feel guilty prioritizing needs • associate pleasure with danger
And because of the dis regulated state money becomes: relief → guilt → shutdown → regret.
The purchase will never fix the void.
This is the biggest key.
We can’t buy a version of us we haven’t yet embodied, an identity we don’t feel worthy of, we can buy our way out of guilt and shame trauma and story loops, We can’t buy away our lack of boundaries and self worth cycles.
Self care will never fix a self worth wound.
Luxury without safety feels like self-sabotage.
If the internal belief is: “I am not safe having money,” then luxury spending becomes a subconscious way to get rid of money fast.
It perpetuates cycles of apologizing, scrambling, staying stuck at income ceilings, staying small, needing help etc.
Luxury becomes part of the survival loop.
When we heal our core by working on the subconscious beliefs and boundaries we get to live in we begin to feel safer with our choices around money, luxury and self care.
We feel safe with the choices we make and in turn make better choices that serve who we desire to be.
Celia Cavalli
WHY MONEY TRAUMA STRUGGLES TO ENJOY LUXURY
(But why conditioning keeps people stuck buying it anyway)
When there’s money trauma these patterns will show up around luxury and self care purchases.
These are subconscious patterns that can be re written to regulate the nervous system around money.
The patterns:
The purchase wasn’t for pleasure it was for regulation.
It wasn’t:
“I desire this.”
It was:
“I need something to make me feel OK right now.”
Self-care becomes soothing, numbing, escape, survival, proof of “deserving good things”….It’s the same energy as stress eating, impulse buying, or emotional spending..but disguised as “wellness.”
The body registers the transaction as:
“I had to BUY safety.”
Which… never sticks.
The association of luxury with guilt, not nourishment.
So even when money is spent on something “special,” the nervous system goes into “I shouldn’t have spent that.”….Was that responsible?”…”What if something comes up?”….”I didn’t really deserve that.”…”Now I’m further behind.”
Pleasure cannot coexist with guilt.
Full stop.
The body shuts down enjoyment to protect itself.
Overgiving → Overextending → Overspending
Looks like:
• rescue others
• compensate emotionally with spending
• feel guilty prioritizing needs
• associate pleasure with danger
it feels:
• foreign
• unsafe
• undeserved
• uncomfortable
• destabilizing
And because of the dis regulated state money becomes:
relief → guilt → shutdown → regret.
The purchase will never fix the void.
This is the biggest key.
We can’t buy a version of us we haven’t yet embodied, an identity we don’t feel worthy of, we can buy our way out of guilt and shame trauma and story loops, We can’t buy away our lack of boundaries and self worth cycles.
Self care will never fix a self worth wound.
Luxury without safety feels like self-sabotage.
If the internal belief is:
“I am not safe having money,”
then luxury spending becomes a subconscious way to get rid of money fast.
It perpetuates cycles of apologizing, scrambling, staying stuck at income ceilings, staying small, needing help etc.
Luxury becomes part of the survival loop.
When we heal our core by working on the subconscious beliefs and boundaries we get to live in we begin to feel safer with our choices around money, luxury and self care.
We feel safe with the choices we make and in turn make better choices that serve who we desire to be.
3 weeks ago | [YT] | 0