Perception Academy NLP & Coach Training

*** When Coaching Clients Don't Know What They Want to Work on In a Session***

Do your coaching/consulting clients ever come into their sessions not knowing what they want to work on? It can be a frustrating experience for you as the coach because without your client’s agenda, what will we talk about? The more your clients are investing into the sessions the worse it can be because if they don’t have something valuable to work on how are you going to be able to provide value to them and leave them a more than satisfied customer who will refer their friends/colleagues?

This can be equally frustrating for your client as well because if they don’t have anything important to talk about then they may begin to doubt why they are investing this money with you in the first place.

The more value you are able to provide as a coach the more value you will be able to charge and so in this article I am going to share with you some strategies you can use to decrease the probability that your clients will come into your session’s without a significant outcome, and if they do you’ll have some several strategies to handle it quickly and effectively.

One of the first things you can do to prevent this situation is to keep good notes about potential topics to work on with every client. I start generating this list from the first time I meet the potential client in the consult.

An important thing to keep in mind is to confirm with the client that any particular item belongs on that list before adding it.

For example. before I add an item to the list I will say something like:
* “You just mentioned X. Would that be something important for us to work on at some point in our work together?”
* Or, “I am hearing X pattern/blindspot, would that be significant for us to work on at some point?”
* Or, “I just heard X. If we were to change that, would this move you forwards towards the outcome we have contracted to facilitate you towards? (assuming you have contracted to support them towards a specific outcome which is an entire post all on its own).”

Whenever I hear something we could work on I ask them a question such as the examples above and add it to the list. This way we have plenty of meaningful things we could work on in future sessions.

With a list like this, at the beginning of your sessions you can ask your client what they want on for this particular session and if they come up short you can prompt them with some ideas.

For example I may say something like, “Perhaps we could work X, or Y, or Z? Or with those in mind, is there anything else that would be even more significant for us to focus on today?”

I am always sure to offer a menu list of at least 3 options, and follow the menu list with a statement leaving it open to them to add something more significant. In this way I always give my client the authority to drive the agenda of the session and they never feel I am imposing my agenda on them.

This way you can prompt them with suggestions and nudge the session forwards while still allowing your clients to take authority for their life, become more decisive, and live in a way that is more self-directed which are all valuable benefits of coaching.

Another tool you can use to minimize this situation from occurring is to send an email before the session asking your client to send you some ideas about what they would like to work on in your upcoming session (ideally you can automate these emails).

While in my experience many if not most clients won’t reply to those automated emails, it gives you an extra tool to prime your client for the upcoming session. If you find a client has a pattern of coming to your sessions without an agenda in mind you can remind them of these emails and the importance of taking a few minutes before the session to think about what would be most meaningful for them to work on.

The more meaningful the topics your clients bring to your sessions the more meaningful their results will be and the more value you’ll have the opportunity to provide them. And as a general rule, the more value you’re able to provide the higher prices you’ll be able to charge and the more your clients will spread the word about the value of your services and refer the people they care about.

'Session structure’ (including pre and post session) is just one of the topics we cover in my coach mentoring programs that help coaches who are already generating revenue from their coaching business to generate a steady flow of new clients through word of mouth through delivering stellar client results, session after session. We also work on your self, skills, and business systems including coaching supervision sessions to support you to deliver consistent transformational results, session after session.

If you’re interested in going deeper feel free to DM me and we can schedule a quick chat to see if it’s a good fit and as always, if you have any questions, comments, or insights feel free to leave them in the comments below!

3 years ago (edited) | [YT] | 0

Perception Academy NLP & Coach Training

*** How do you prepare for your client sessions? ***
I was in a session with a client last week and she mentioned she had been feeling unprepared going into her coaching sessions. As a solution she had started blocking off a few hours on Monday to prepare for all of her sessions for the week and it wasn’t working as efficiently as she would like to.

“How do you prepare for your coaching sessions?”, she asked me. And rather than keeping it between me and her I decided to share my process more widely in the hopes it will serve you as well.

Firstly, being adequately prepared is one of the reasons my sessions are 50 minutes rather than an hour long. This gives me 10 minutes in between sessions to take care of my needs and to prepare for my upcoming client.

My clients are very understanding of the ‘shorter’ sessions because they understand that the 10 minutes that they are ‘missing’ on the back end of our sessions is gained on the front end of the session when I am using the 10 minutes before their session to prepare for them.

What specifically do I do to prepare?

Firstly I review my client notes from previous sessions. While I am looking over the notes I am asking myself questions such as:

Is there anything important from prior sessions that I would like to bring up in this upcoming session?
What is the larger outcome or outcomes that they contracted me to support them to achieve and are we on track for that?
If yes, what can we celebrate and if no, what are my thoughts on how to proceed?
Did they email me anything in between the session that I would like to add to their notes, celebrate with them, or ask followup questions around?
Did I have any insights about them and our work together that I would like to bring up in this upcoming session?
Did they have any homework, tasking, assignments, or action items I need to hold them accountable for?

I also take a few moments to use the restroom, get a glass of water, and to get myself into my best mental-emotional state for the upcoming session. This includes making sure to ‘leave my own stuff at the door’ so I can show up cleanly for my client and I get myself into a state of curiosity and ‘being of service’ amongst other mental-emotional states.

Because I have been professionally coaching for over a decade I very rarely (and I mean very very rarely) do any specific study or practice for a particular client session. That being said, if you are earlier in your development it is probably wise to schedule some time every week for training, practice, and skill development for any upcoming sessions.

My only caveat regarding studying is to beware of spending too much time preparing or studying for a particular session unless you believe that study will be useful in many of your future client sessions. If the studying won’t deliver a long term return on investment then I would question if it is truly necessary, or perhaps if this client is a good fit for you.

So there you have it - a fairly thorough description of my process for preparing for client sessions that I have honed in on after over a decade of professional coaching from reviewing notes, taking care of my needs, and getting into my best coaching state.

If you want to deliver high-quality coaching and the quality of results that your clients can’t help but spread the word about, being well-prepared for your client sessions is a necessity and I trust this article has given you valuable insights for setting up your own systems for being proactively prepared.

On a side note, preparing for sessions is one of the sub-topics I cover in my coach mentoring programs that help coaches who are already generating revenue from their coaching business to increase their recurring business and to generate a steady flow of new clients through word of mouth every single month. We also work on the marketing, business, and sales systems as well as coaching supervision sessions to deliver consistent transformational results session after session.

If you’re interested DM me and we can schedule a quick chat to see if it’s a good fit, and regardless, I trust this article will positively impact your self, skills, and business far out into the future.

3 years ago | [YT] | 0

Perception Academy NLP & Coach Training

A former client reached out to me a couple of weeks ago asking for advice on what to do when his coaching sessions don’t work out as well as he’d hoped. He wasn’t sure why some were more effective than others and he was even questioning if he was doing something wrong!

“How do you cope with that situation?” he asked. “Do you accept that's just how it goes?”

There can be many reasons why a particular session would not be as effective as others, and without watching the particular session in question it would be impossible to speculate…

However there are some general guidelines to diagnose what is going wrong and how to respond in effective ways when you find yourself in these situations.

💎 How is your relationship with ‘failure’/mistake making?
If you always got the results you desired/expected you would never learn or grow so be grateful for these experiences as opportunities for growth and allow yourself to get curious as to why this session didn’t get your expected results. Was it their state? Was it my technique? Was it a lack of flexibility on my part? You may or may not be able to pinpoint the exact reason, but there is value in the exploration to better prepare yourself for similar situations if/when they arise in the future.

💎 Were you adequately prepared?
Could you have performed better if you had prepared more for this particular session? Did you block off some time before the session to review this client’s notes? Did you take a few moments to get yourself into the best state for coaching?

💎 Have you been taking good care of yourself?
Have you been sleeping/eating/exercising well? Have you been under stress recently? Take good care of your needs to increase the likelihood of performing at the best of your abilities.

💎 Was it a fluke?
Perhaps the stars just weren’t aligned today. Sometimes we can do everything right and still not get our desired results. Not all coaching conversations will be transformational, nor do we need all of them to be for the client to get their desired results. Release the pressure for every session to be transformational --- every session does not need to be transformational, just one of them.

💎 Are you overly attached to your client’s outcomes?
Your client’s results are out of your control. Are you being over-responsible for your client’s results? If yes, could that be taking responsibility away from your clients which paradoxically is decreasing the likelihood of them achieving the outcomes you so very much want them to achieve?

💎 Are you taking it personally?
When your clients don’t get their desired results (or your expected results) have you been taking it personally? It’s not about you. At the very most it is about your lack of skillfulness at your present level of development. The good news is that you can develop your skills. Don’t let it cut you to your core, but instead take it as an opportunity to learn and grow.

💎 Is this client a good fit for you/your methods?
Is this client a good fit for you? If you sense that they won't get results from your style it is perfectly okay to offer them a refund for any unused sessions and let them know your honest perspective. Be sure to take full responsibility on you and not them e.g. “My sense is that MY skills/techniques are not going to provide your desired results and I wanted to be authentic and upfront about that as soon as possible.” Send them on their way or ideally refer them on to someone who you think will be a better fit. Learn from this and do a better job filtering who will be a good fit and who won't/

💎 Do you continually invest in developing your skills?
While we want to be accepting of our shortcomings, we also don’t want to resign to our present level of skillfulness. Mastery is a never ending pathway and becoming consistently transformational as a coach is a long-term outcome with a very high level skill cap. The more time and energy you invest in increasing your skills, the more skilled you will become and the more frequently your sessions will meet and exceed your expectations.

💎 Have you received coaching supervision recently (or ever)?
In my experience the absolute fastest way to develop your skills towards mastery is through receiving high-quality feedback from someone who is further along the pathway than we are. Coach/consultant supervision sessions are a big part of my coach mentoring program and a powerful tool for accelerated learning and skill development. Just a few sessions of high quality coaching supervision can be equivalent in value to dozens of hours of training and skill development.

While we will never be 100% successful with 100% of our clients in 100% of our sessions, the more skilled we get the more probable that we will get a higher quality result, with a larger proportion of our clients, in a higher proportion of our sessions.

When you are better able to filter in and out the right and wrong clients, manage your state when sessions don’t meet your (or your client’s expectations), and develop your skills to increase the frequency of successful sessions you’ll be on your way toward building a coaching practice your client’s can’t help but spread the word about.

On a quick sidebar, these topics (including coaching supervision sessions and more) are exactly what we cover in my one year coach mentoring program to support coaches/consultants to build a steady referral based business so you can spend less time marketing and more time doing the work you love. If you think it might be a good fit DM me and we’ll have a quick chat to see if it's right for you.

3 years ago | [YT] | 0

Perception Academy NLP & Coach Training

Simply put, NLP allows people to become FREE.

Would you like a framework for how to apply all of the skills, patterns & models of NLP?

The acronym FREE breaks down to:

F – Flexibility
R – Rapport
E – Expansion
E – Ecology

💎 Flexibility

This first step in applying any NLP skill or model is to experience it yourself. When you experience a particular technique for yourself you will understand how it works experientially.

If you are working with someone else but haven’t personally experienced it you will be limited in your ability to facilitate change. You will also be incongruent in that you aren’t practicing what you are preaching.

Flexibility speaks to the personal development side of NLP, Neuro-Semantics & coaching where you are experiencing the processes, within yourself, in service of your personal self-actualization.

💎 Rapport

As human beings, life is about more than just our own personal growth. We are social beings and in order to accomplish many of the tasks we need to accomplish in our day to day lives (especially the big ones) requires the participation and collaboration of others.

This requires a strong foundation of rapport.

The ability to build rapport using the NLP models will 100% depend on your level of personal flexibility.

I like to say, you can build rapport with anyone, anywhere, independent of them…. the only limitation is your level of personal flexibility.

Without rapport you will not have much power in how you influence, lead, or coach others. And without personal flexibility you will not have power to build rapport.

💎 Expansion

With personal flexibility we open the potential for rapport, and with rapport we now have the right and capability to expand the minds of others. We now reached the space where we can authentically influence whether in sales, leadership, parenting, coaching, etc.

At this point you can use NLP patterns, design custom interventions, or whatever other tool you are going to use to open someone’s perspective.

If you have done the rapport step authentically you may even realize that you are the one who needs to expand your mind and open yourself to be led rather than leading!

💎 Ecology

What is the long-term impact of your influence in others and in the world as you invite them to expand their minds? Ideally, we want to make sure that our influence respects the ecology of the larger systems.

This is a piece that I find is missing in a lot of leadership and influence.

You can help people to change but is this change aligned with the higher evolution of themselves and the larger systems that they are a part of? If not, it would be ‘unecological’.

When we respect the ecology of the larger systems the influence we have over ourselves and others becomes much more likely to be robust, supported and sustainable.

This is an overview of the F.R.E.E. model and I trust this framework will support you in becoming more flexible in yourself so that you can build rapport with a wider range of people, increase your capabilities to expand the minds of others in a way that respects the larger ecology.

What are you learning from this? What are you taking away from this? Do you have any questions, comments, or feedback? Feel free to leave them here and I look forward to connecting with you >

3 years ago | [YT] | 3

Perception Academy NLP & Coach Training

>>HOW TO CREATE A SAFE SPACE FOR COACHING CLIENTS TO OPEN UP & SHARE THEIR TRUTHS<<

A client recently asked me how to build safety into their coaching so their clients can feel safe to speak their truths”.

Beyond the basic rapport techniques there are many coaching skills & states that support this process which is so crucial to being effective as a coach and communicator...

AWARENESS OF THE CONTEXT

My first consideration is the context with which the person came to you.

Did they come by choice? Did they come to you tentatively or with desire? Did they invest money to have this meeting?

All of these factors will help determine the level of ‘rapport’ right out of the gate. The more desiring, willing, and invested they are as a general rule the more open they will be to share more deeply.

DEVELOP YOUR SKILLS OF LISTENING AND SUPPORTING

Most people are not aware of their ‘real’ problems’ or ‘real goals’ — or at least they aren’t very clear on how to explain them. So they will test you with smaller/pseudo problems and see how you respond before bringing the ‘real’/’deeper’ issues to the table. How do you handle these?

Do you default quickly to giving advice? Or do you actively & non-judgmentally listen, ask exploratory questions, acknowledge what you are hearing, check that you are understanding correctly, summarize what you have heard, etc. Do you separate out pseudo-problems & symptoms from the real issues and hear what isn’t being stated directly?

Do you call them out when you calibrate that they are being inauthentic, shallow, or playing it safe and invite them to get real?

These will allow them to feel safe, supported, understood and build trust in your competence & caring so they will be more comfortable to share their deeper, more meaningful issues.

DEVELOPING YOUR DEEP QUESTIONING SKILLS

Ask deeper questions that pull them one level deeper than they have shared and see if you get resistance or if they follow your lead. In many contexts it is our job as a ‘coach’ to invite deeper sharing rather than to ‘wait for it’.


DEVELOPING YOUR SKILL OF FRAMING

Setting frames up front can help accelerate this process.

Let them know that your conversations are confidential. Let them know up front that you’re going to ask them deeper questions to get to the heart of what is most important. Let them know up front that the more real they are, the more real/authentic their results will be, etc.

What frames can you set that will allow them to feel more comfortable/help resolve some resistance they may be feeling to authentically share?


DEVELOPING YOUR COACHING STATE

Lastly for now, how well do you unconditionally accept your clients? How well can you appreciate them as people and even appreciate their ‘problems’/parts of themselves that even they don’t appreciate about themselves yet?

How much can you see them as a unique and sacred individual on a growth journey? How much do you put yourself aside and so they can sense it is all about them rather than you, your ego, or your results. And again, how well can you ‘just listen’ and explore without the need to change anything.

All of these skills will support you to create the safe space your clients need to open up, uncover the real issues, and create meaningful changes that make your work so valuable they can’t help but actively promote and praise you and your work.

Any questions, comments, contributions? Share them below!

3 years ago | [YT] | 3

Perception Academy NLP & Coach Training

How do you respond when your coaching client responds to your questions with "I don't know?"

I was recently asked this question by one of my coach mentoring clients and in this post I am going to share how I was originally trained to respond, how I now respond to this, and how they are different.

First off, while it is totally ok to not know the answers to things there are also times when people can use 'I don't know' as a cop out...

For example, when I am running training programs there are many times when I am asked questions about things I genuinely don't know. I typically respond with “Let me do some research and get back to you on that.” When asked about things external to yourself it is okay not to know.

However when there is a question that is being asked about something that is internal to someone, for example you ask your coaching client what they want to achieve or what they believe...

...and their answer is “I don’t know”, many times it is an excuse to not think. They are avoiding doing the work of thinking it through to get an answer.

When I was first trained as a coach I was taught to respond to “I don’t know” with what we refer to as the “As-if frame”.

This is the frame of mind where you imagine “as if” something was true and generate an answer that way...

The specific question I was trained to ask was something along the lines of, “Imagine as if you did know. If you did know, what would the answer be?”

This is a great question to get someone to think outside of the box of “I don’t know” as this guides the client to imagine/ construct an answer to the question.

Currently I still invite my clients to construct the answer but I go about it a little differently...

The first thing I do is what we refer to as “a pacing statement.” A pacing statement is basically meeting someone where they are currently before leading them to somewhere different.

The pacing statement I typically make in this situation is “That is correct, you don’t know…”. This allows me to maintain rapport before I challenge them to generate a new answer.

Another frame I may set as a coach is...

“If I was asking you questions you already knew the answers to you wouldn’t be getting much out of this coaching session because you would just be telling me what you already know!”

After I pace them I invite them to go inside and construct an answer.

“That’s right, you don’t know…. yet. And so I invite you to go inside, take a moment to think about it, and let me know when you have an answer.”

To me, 'I don’t know' means 'I don’t know yet' and this way of thinking allows you, as a coach, to trust in your client’s own resourcefulness to create their own answers & generate their own solutions.

As a quick recap... when my client says “I don’t know” I let them know that means “I don’t know yet” and I invite them to go inside to find an answer and come back out to me when they’ve constructed an answer and share with me what they’ve created...

Whatever answer they generate is likely not going to be ‘perfect’ in the final sense of the word but it will be good enough & definitely better than the blank space of unmapped territory that they had before thinking it through.

Having generated an answer for themselves, they will take much more ownership over it. Beyond just allowing them to construct their own answers, at a higher level, you are training them to do the work of ‘thinking’ for themselves which is one of the values of working with a coach.

Any questions, comments, or alternative responses? Feel free to comment below!

3 years ago (edited) | [YT] | 4

Perception Academy NLP & Coach Training

Would you like to dramatically increase the probability that you’ll achieve your desired outcomes?

If yes, one of the most important determiners lays in how much you want to do the things you need to do.

🧠 When you think about the things you need to do to accomplish your goals how do you feel?

In my experience most people feel great when focusing on the desired end-result and imagining all of the great feelings that will come along with it…

However, when it comes to thinking about their necessary action steps they elicit themselves into states of aversion which supports them in procrastinating and excusing themselves from action.

🌀 Would you like to test this for yourself?

Take a moment to think about one of your ‘elusive’ goals that never seems to actualize. Now think about taking the required action steps and notice how you feel. Are you associating negative emotions with the action steps?

If yes, the great news is you can understand why you’ve been avoiding action. It makes perfect sense. Anyone who is associating negative emotions with a behavior or habit would most likely do the same!

🧠 Are you ready to change this orientation?

Let's take some time to imagine bringing joy and pleasure to the action steps.

Here are some questions to support you:
✨ Do you know anyone who enjoys doing that activity?
✨ What would it be like to do the task if you were them?
✨ What is it like when you imagine yourself taking that action with joy?
✨ What else can you do to support yourself in making that task more enjoy-able?
✨ When you bring joy to that process how much does it increase the probability of you taking action?

When you intentionally take time to imagine enjoying the process the probability that you will follow through with those actions will dramatically increase which greatly increases the probability of you achieving your goals.

Beyond that, when you imagine bringing more joy to the process (rather than focusing so much on the end state) the journey becomes much more enjoyable regardless of whether or not you actually achieve your goals. This benefit is extremely powerful because whether or not we achieve anything in the outside world is never 100% in our power so we might as well enjoy the process!

When we bring more joy to the process we start to build up a track record of success… Not a track record of success in achieving our end goals, but a track record of success in terms of following through on the things that we set out to do and doing them with more joy and pleasure.

Powerful, yes?

Let me summarize the process for you…

1. Think of a big goal you’ve been wanting to accomplish but haven’t been taking action towards with the quality you would like.
2. Think of a leveraged behavior that, if you were to take it more consistently, would bring you closer towards your desired end state.
3. Imagine taking that action with a state of joy.
4. Practice this regularly until your default becomes to feel pleasure when thinking about taking the desired action.
Seems simple enough, doesn’t it?

Whether something is joyful or not is a matter of perception… whose perceptions are in your head?

The more joy you can associate with your important actions the more likely you’ll consistently follow through and the more likely you’ll get what you want out of life. Enjoy this process, let me know how it works for you, and I trust this will support you in creating a more enjoy-able life journey.

3 years ago | [YT] | 2

Perception Academy NLP & Coach Training

A major focus of mine over the past few years has been on emotional state management: How can I run my own emotions rather than my emotions running me?

In order to utilize your human power of emotions as a tool to enhance your life, the first step is to recognize that, in addition to being automatically induced into emotions by your environment, you can access your emotions purposefully.

You can access your emotions by choice and intentionally practice them!

🧠 But which emotions should I practice?

The fact is that most of us do not have a very rich emotional vocabulary which greatly limits the number of emotions that we can consciously choose to access...

🧠 Would you like to begin the process of increasing your ‘positive emotional vocabulary’?

When you do you'll have more choice and flexibility in the states you can choose to live your life from...

And if I've said it once I've said it a thousand times...

✨The quality of your life is determined by the quality of your states.✨

Below is a short list of resourceful emotions I have compiled for you.

Once you know what your options are and what states you are capable of experiencing and utilizing as a human, the next step is to practice them so that you have ready access to your desired states.

I cover how to do this more fully in my other articles, videos and courses.

Enjoy the list and feel free to leave your questions and comments...

A Short List of Resourceful Emotions:
💎 Acceptance
💎 Appreciation
💎 Calm
💎 Excitement
💎 Joy
💎 Strength
💎 Focus
💎 Awe
💎 Letting go
💎 Confidence
💎 Power
💎 Peace
💎 Observing
💎 Ecstasy
💎 Healing
💎 Rapport
💎 Openness
💎 Patience
💎 Honoring
💎 Love
💎 Oneness
💎 Just Observing
💎 Freedom
💎 Gratitude
💎 Forgiveness
💎 Compassion
💎 Being of service
💎 Love
💎 Beauty
💎 Honest
💎 Goodness
💎 Wholeness
💎 Effortlessness
💎 Playfulness
💎 Respect
💎 Curiosity

🧠 What of these emotions do you experience often?
🧠 Are there any emotions on the list below that you almost never experience or are unfamiliar with?
🧠 Is there anything you'd like to add to the list?
🧠What are the top 1-3 for you to intentionally practice?
🧠 When and how often will you practice them?

The more you can intentionally access the states that would increase the quality of your life, the more true power you will be able to sustain and the more you will be able to use your emotions as tools to intentionally improve the quality of your life.

Onward towards higher levels of mastering your perception!

3 years ago | [YT] | 5

Perception Academy NLP & Coach Training

As human beings we have a phenomenal power to identify ourselves with people, groups & things.

Choosing who and what we identify with is an important skill to develop, however there is also a big danger in identifying...

When something goes against something we identify with we tend to take it personally which is inaccurate, unnecessary, and unresourceful.

This solution lays in our power of dis-identification....

One of the things us human beings tend to over-identify with is our beliefs.

The problem is when our beliefs are challenged we can take it as a personal threat which is neither healthy nor true.

Have you ever believed something in the past that you don’t believe anymore?

Maybe you believed in Santa Claus growing up, or believed in a fad that was cool and then it fell out of fashion?

I believed a lot of things that I don’t believe anymore, and this is the point…

If you have believed things in the past that you no longer believe now, and you are still here, then clearly you are not your beliefs.

If your beliefs and values can shift and change then clearly you are not your beliefs. You are more than your beliefs.

People also tend to over identify with their bodies....

Regardless of whether “I am someone with a great body” or “I am someone with a ‘not great’ body”, when we over identify with our body our sense of self becomes a roller coaster ride that depends on the changing conditions of our body.

We are born with a body and over time our body changes and gets stronger and more capable.

Then at some point there will be a decline in our strength and capabilities.

Your body has changed a lot since the day you were born. It will continue to change as you continue to develop. Through all of the bodily changes you have experienced you are still here. You are more than your body.

We, as human beings, also tend to over identify with our roles...
Throughout our lives we play many roles and the roles we play come, go & shift as we develop through our life stages.

If you identify with your role and dislike it I am sure you can imagine the impact that would have on one’s ‘self’.

And if you identify with a role that you love when that role goes away, for example when you retire, it can lead to an identity crisis. If “I am” my role and my role goes away then “Who am I?”

If the roles you play change, and you are here all along, clearly you are not your roles. You are more than the roles you play.

To their own detriment, many people also tend to over identify with their behaviors...

Have you ever done stuff from the past that you would never do anymore?

As a kid I used to do some stupid things. As a teenager on Halloween my friends and I would throw toilet paper in people’s trees. How could I have done that? I would never do that now!

I did that, I would never do that again, and yet I am still here...

Regardless of past behaviors you are still here, so you must be more than your behaviors.

Over the course of our lives our behaviors and skills change and yet we are here all along.

You could be highly unskilled in a particular context. That says nothing about you as a person. You could be highly skilled at other things & it doesn’t make you a better human being...

And there are many things that you are really good at that one day you’re not going to be so good at anymore and that’s okay because you are more than your behaviors...

Your behaviors and skills do say something about your competence, your confidence in your abilities, but not about ‘who you are’.

In another light, your past is done and over with and yet you are still here. How is that for something to celebrate! If the past is gone and you are still here clearly ‘you’ are not your past. You are more than your past.

In this article I have shared quite a few things that clearly you are not...

If something happens to my body I don’t have to take it personally...
When I come across a belief that contradicts mine I can remain open and not take it as a personal attack.

You may have done some things in the past that you are not proud of, or be unskilled in certain activities and that is okay... You are more than your past and your behaviors.

When we dis-identify ourselves from the things in life that come and go all of the sudden our sense of self becomes more stable, strong and secure. We become more free to try new things, to experiment, and to learn and grow without having our ‘selves’ on the line.

3 years ago (edited) | [YT] | 3

Perception Academy NLP & Coach Training

As I begin to build my content and course curriculum for 2022 I wanted to send one last chance for you to give your input :)

If you have a few minutes today please vote on the following multiple choice survey: forms.gle/vnTwTiEsFmqq5Hwt8

The last question gives you the opportunity to share any thoughts with me that weren't listed on the multiple choice form.

As a gift for your feedback I will be happy to give you access to three of my upcoming 30 minute small group Q&A sessions where you can ask my anything you'd like related to your personal development, coaching, NLP, or whatever will help take you or your business to your next level.

Thank you! Your input is greatly valued.

4 years ago | [YT] | 3