Clayton Olson Coaching

Your healing begins when you redirect your focus to your own healing. #SelfLove #EmotionalGrowth

1 month ago | [YT] | 15

Clayton Olson Coaching

Let me say something that might rub a little:

Just because you're triggered doesn't mean they're doing something wrong.

And just because they’re doing something wrong doesn’t mean it’s their job to fix your past.

Your partner is not your therapist.

They are not your trauma integration plan.

They’re not a mind-reader, a space-holder, or a healing container.

They’re a person.
With their own nervous system.
Their own limits.
Their own story.

Yes, relationships reveal wounds.

But what’s being revealed is yours to hold.

A client came to me recently saying their partner “wasn’t making them feel safe.”

They weren’t yelling. They weren’t crossing boundaries.

They just weren’t reacting the way my client wanted - they weren’t co-regulating “correctly.”

So the client kept escalating.

Demanding deeper emotional presence.

More reassurance. More processing.

But here’s the truth we uncovered together:

It wasn’t that the partner wasn’t safe.

It’s that safety still felt unfamiliar to my client.

They were mistaking intensity for intimacy and calling it a red flag when things were just… calm.

This is what happens when we outsource our healing to another person:

We stop growing and start controlling.

We start demanding and start blaming.

Want a real relationship?

Stop trying to turn your partner into a perfect caretaker.

Stop using emotional language to justify avoidant or anxious patterns.

Stop expecting them to fix the pain that started long before they arrived.

Instead, build the emotional capacity to hold yourself.

So your relationship doesn’t have to collapse under the weight of your unprocessed past.

Healing is your responsibility.

Relationship is where you practice it, not where you avoid it.

If you’re ready to stop projecting your pain onto people who love you, and start building the kind of connection your nervous system can trust.

→ Click here to apply for coaching:
Http://www.claytonolsoncoaching.com/coaching-appli…

We’ll do the work that your relationship can’t do for you.

With love,
Clayton

2 months ago | [YT] | 27

Clayton Olson Coaching

The version of you that was built to survive, to please, to hold it all together…
is being dismantled so something truer can rise.

This pain has intelligence.
Let it rearrange you.
Let it strip away everything that isn’t love—starting with the way you abandoned yourself to keep someone else.

If you’re ready to do the deeper work, I’m here.

You don’t have to navigate this alone. 🤍

#healingheart #softreminders #lettertoyou #breakuprecovery #youarenotalone

2 months ago | [YT] | 35

Clayton Olson Coaching

Revenge keeps you tied to what hurt you. Choose healing instead. #LetGoAndGrow

2 months ago | [YT] | 59

Clayton Olson Coaching

Growth and comfort cannot coexist. The relationship that refuses to bend with new truths will eventually break under their weight.

2 months ago | [YT] | 16

Clayton Olson Coaching

Trust the process—even when it hurts. The universe might be making room for something greater. #DivinelyRedirected

2 months ago | [YT] | 60

Clayton Olson Coaching

"Love fades in the spaces we stop showing up. 💔"

Most relationships don’t end in a single moment—they unravel in the small, quiet ways we fail to be present. When distractions take priority. When effort turns into autopilot. When the people who mean the most get what’s left of us, instead of the best of us.


💡 Where have you stopped showing up?
💬 Tag someone who needs this reminder. Let’s talk in the comments.

2 months ago | [YT] | 84

Clayton Olson Coaching

The first day without them… everything feels different.

Whether you walked away or were the one left behind, the weight of change is undeniable.

But what if this isn’t just an ending— but an opportunity to find yourself?

You can let this moment define you in regret, or you can use it to rebuild, rediscover, and rise.

Who do you choose to become on the other side of this?

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3 months ago | [YT] | 30

Clayton Olson Coaching

Your nervous system is running scripts you didn’t write—installed by past pain, old beliefs, and unresolved stories. When you look inward, are you aware of the belief and unconscious script creating the outcome you're getting?

3 months ago | [YT] | 48

Clayton Olson Coaching

The challenge is not to understand these concepts, that's going to be straightforward.

The challenge is to take what you learn and begin to apply it.

#growthmindset #selfimprovement #personaldevelopment #lifelonglearning

3 months ago (edited) | [YT] | 38