The Rational Female

A pleasure to give away yet more books to charity.

I also purchased new copies of books I already own that are in poor condition (and subsequently gave away).

Thank heavens for Goodreads. Helps a super obsessive lady like me stay super organised...

Follow me on Goodreads: www.goodreads.com/author/show/18169646.Zarina_Mach…

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1 day ago |[YT] | 6

The Rational Female

This sums up my overall thoughts on modern political discourse, feminism and misandry, certain things discussed in men's advocacy spaces, and particularly Cornell 7.

Quote originally taken from Rod Serling with one tiny detail added by me. Created courtesy of ChatGPT.

2 days ago |[YT] | 21

The Rational Female

An article I wrote was published today on the Substack FairForAll.

**Has a Loss of Community Created a Mental Health Crisis for Today’s Youth?**

It’s no surprise to many that there is a crisis of mental illness sweeping those largely born after 1990. Young people are reporting substantially higher rates of anxiety, depression and suicidal ideation than previous generations. Better reporting, destigmatisation and advances in psychological medicine account for some, but not all of these changes. Declining social connection is the more serious factor at play.

Read my full article HERE: news.fairforall.org/p/has-a-loss-of-community-crea…

2 days ago |[YT] | 5

The Rational Female

I am continuously stumped by this.

(Almost) everybody I know personally in the UK who is a Christian is either left-leaning or apolitical.

Even the right-leaning ones are not anti-gays or anti-abortion.

I have personally dated a few Christian men and if they had not told me they were Christian I would not have realised that they were. That's most religious people in the UK (certainly in London).

I am stumped and baffled by those online who genuinely view the world as "atheist = left-wing" and "Christian = right-wing". I cannot tell if such folk are trolling, or just very ignorant. Or on a different note, perhaps that is what they grew up around, so they assume the rest of the world is like this.

Statistically, men are more likely to identify as atheist than women, and women are more likely to identify as religious. From my perspective as an atheist, I think this makes sense. Atheism requires one to think critically, challenge established worldviews and "rebel" against the status quo (most of the world is religious, atheists are a statistical minority). Women tend to be more agreeable than men, and men tend to be better at "going against the grain". Women also tend to be more group-oriented while men tend to be better at being independent, and are not as bothered as "being liked" as women are.

The people historically who have challenged religion in the West have largely been male: Galileo, Charles Darwin, David Hume, Friedrich Nietzsche, Albert Camus, Bertrand Russell, Stephen Hawking, Richard Dawkins, Christopher Hitchens. The most famous female I can think of in this sphere is Ayn Rand.

I am becoming more familiar with clear cultural differences between myself as a British person and the way a lot of Americans seem to think. I find it baffling, frustrating and intriguing. One of the reasons why I think my work is *particularly* important is that I bring a fresh perspective BECAUSE I AM BRITISH (and from London, specifically). We NEED more young, British, politically heterodox people to speak out against certain things and contribute to the cultural zeitgeist.

(Note: I am NOT saying that religious people have no critical thinking skills or are all stupid. Obviously plenty of religious/spiritual folk are and have been very intelligent.)

Men vs Women Religious Affiliation: www.pewresearch.org/religion/2016/03/22/women-more…

2 days ago |[YT] | 13

The Rational Female

Who would you say has generally suffered more historically?

3 days ago |[YT] | 20

The Rational Female

Me:

"Spends hours researching and reading books that criticise feminism and discuss men's issues, sits and calmly listens to others and their perspectives, doesn't agree with narrative about historical female victimisation and male dominance, and calls out legitimately bad female behaviour."

Them: "oh nice, you're against feminism."

Also me:

"Doesn't join in on woman-bashing, doesn't suddenly blame everything on women, doesn't insist abortion should be banned, doesn't insist that men are the real victims who have been historically oppressed, doesn't call all modern women whores, and doesn't think women shouldn't be allowed to vote."

Them: "OH I SEE, YOU'RE REALLY A FEMINIST!"

Am I shocked by this?

Not particularly.

Mainly fed-up.

4 days ago |[YT] | 24

The Rational Female

I have thought deeply about the Cornell 7 Case. I drafted a video script on this yesterday. I have read about it and watched several other videos on this. It's taken me several days to fully be clear about where I stand, but I now have a pretty solid view.

A lot of people are not going to like what I have to say about this.

I am quite upset and angry about the entire thing. I think this stems from many cultural issues, including the narrative around rape and assault.

We do not live in a "rape culture" in the West. Most people have a shocked visceral reaction to rape and assault. The average woman (and man) has no idea what it's like to be raped or assaulted. The majority of men are NOT rapists nor do they wish to be. This doesn’t mean people are inherently good, but it also doesn't mean that most people are evil. There is a line between "normal flawed person" and "evil".

Many in men's spaces discuss false accusations. I have looked online and the cited number for false allegations is 2-10%. Even if the actual numbers are higher, it still follows that THE MAJORITY of allegations of rape and SA are NOT false.

Most women do not accuse men of rape and most men do not commit rape. The news and social media makes it seem common but it actually is not.

Sensationalism is to blame.

Most people don't know much about this because most people do not go through it nor know others personally who have. I have noticed over the past year from conversing with others how many seem to be disconnected from reality. Most people really don’t deal with or understand addiction, mental illness, physical assault, sexual assault, or other such harsh realities of life. The average person is aware of this, but when seriously confronted with it, their reaction is to look blank and have no clue what to say because it's so strange and shocking to them.

I know people who were molested as children. I know people who have been raped, beaten up, had dysfunctional parents, tried to commit suicide, and have been through hell and back. (Men and women.) This is not "odd" to me, it's real life. Years ago when I was a teenager living with my family, a guy we knew was stabbed on the road where I lived. When I told people at university they were all shocked at this, because most people WOULD be.

In cases of SA, a common trauma response is to not realise that what happened was assault. This is most likely why the girl "changed her statement". I do not believe she was "just looking for attention". I do think Jane Doe put herself in a vulnerable position and should have gone home. I don’t think she made sensible choices. I also do not think we should blame her and point fingers at her.

As we know, the initial threesome was consensual. But having looked at what happened, it's clear that a lot of what happened after was not. Being severely intoxicated and coerced into doing things one is uncomfortable with while under the influence is very serious. It's difficult for those unfamiliar with SA to understand. It's a crime that is VERY tough to prove because it is someone else's word against someone else's. This is likely why the men have not been found guilty.

I do not know any women in reality who has ever labelled a regretful drunken sexual encounter as "rape". I do NOT think this happens as much as people keep saying it does. Most women get upset but they do not turn around and cry rape. It's not a common response. A common response from women in these situations is emotional immaturity and whiny behaviour, not SA allegations. (False allegations ARE very serious and I am NOT downplaying them, I am just saying they are not common and need not be blown out of proportion.) Also, going through the legal system is extremely grating for anyone.

Most people accused of rape and SA do not go to prison because it's almost impossible to prove. Most people who have been assaulted do not want to talk about it. Many are told what happened to them was not even assault. I know this from personal experience and it's very sad. People imagine it as a "straightforward" crime. It is not. It's the same as most people thinking an alcoholic is someone sitting on a park bench with a brown paper bag. Reality is not what people think it is and I'm tired of the collective ignorance of others on this. I see it everywhere now.

I am very glad these boys have been expelled and I am furious as usual at how polarising all this is. I am sick of the cultural narrative being split into two camps all the time. Sure, let's go from blaming men for everything to blaming everything on women. A lot of people want to go there now and I'm fed up of it.

A video on this will be up in November.

5 days ago |[YT] | 9

The Rational Female

Which sexual ethic do you lean most towards? (For men and women.)

5 days ago |[YT] | 15

The Rational Female

I realised something.

I have zero interest in a man’s height.

I have been on dates with men who were tall (6ft+) and shorter (5ft8). It tells you absolutely nothing about the man as a person, whether he is a serious romantic prospect, whether he is deeply interested in you, or whether the two of you are actually compatible.

Obviously I do not want a man who is a dwarf. I myself am rather small (5ft2). I suppose 5ft7 at minimum is fair if I were to list a number. But truthfully, I do not think a man’s height matters at all.

I think that women obsessing about men’s height is like men obsessing over women’s body count. I understand this is not a popular view, particularly online. Of course we need SOME standards; it’s reasonable for a man to reject a woman who has been with 60+ people, or a woman to reject a man who is 4ft10.

However, I believe people would do well to look past these sorts of things when looking for a suitable long-term mate. In several videos and articles, I have discussed the evolutionary reasons behind these preferences. But regarding my PERSONAL views, in the 21st century, I think we would do well to leave some things behind. A woman doesn’t really *need* a man who is over 6ft, and a man doesn’t really *need* a woman who is a virgin.

I do not pretend to be an expert in dating, but I think people looking for a long-term partner would do well to consider these sorts of things as being more important than height and body count:

Do you make each other laugh?

Are your lifestyles compatible?

Are your religious views (or lack thereof) compatible?

Are you on the same page about marriage and children?

Do you want to go out a lot together or mostly stay in?

Do you have similar attitudes towards hygiene and cleanliness?

Do you want pets?

Do you want to do lots of travelling together?

I have been thinking A LOT about dating and romantic relationships this year, and reflecting on all the years of terrible, unhelpful advice I have been given. I see two polarising cultural narratives in the modern West:

1. “Love yourself, trust yourself, don’t look for love and let love find you, it will happen when it happens, be open to receiving love.”

This is the worst advice one can give a person. I can’t tell you the amount of times I have met men “unexpectedly” only for it to have gone nowhere or ended in a premature breakup. It’s the sort of vague woo-woo “manifestation” rubbish rampant in the self-help era. This obsession with “self love” and “loving yourself first” helps nobody. More practical guidance would tell others to work through their past traumas, attachment issues and personal difficulties with a therapist, identify negative behavioural and psychological patterns, and look for someone who is also psychologically and emotionally healthy.

People tell people now (particularly young women) to focus on our work and education, and treat marriage and family as an “afterthought”. If a twenty-year-old woman talks about wanting a husband, people laugh and tell her she is too young for all that.

The other main cultural narrative:

2. Romance books, love songs, movies and TV shows bombarding us with fairytale ideas about “soulmates.”

I have found The School of Life YouTube channel extremely helpful in outlining more practical views on love and romance. It’s not anti-romance, it’s anti-romanTICISM. Having a life partner is wonderful, and a beautiful part of life. But this person is not your sole reason for existence. We shouldn’t “mystify” love.

I hope to (informally) help others unlearn a lot of the crap we are told about modern dating and relationships. If I turn into Alain de Botton in twenty years, I’ll be happy.

A while back, I posted an article on my Substack listing 100 questions to ask before getting seriously romantically involved with someone. Check it out here: therationalf.substack.com/p/100-questions-to-ask-s…

6 days ago |[YT] | 16

The Rational Female

Yesterday's poll made me laugh.

I was surprised by the amount of people that think I am bisexual (or "something else"). Perhaps some were half-joking.

As it happens, I am 100% heterosexual. Never been romantically or sexually involved nor interested in a woman.

I do not believe sexuality is "fluid" or "a choice". I think we are what we are and that cannot change. Most people are straight, a minority of people are bisexual or homosexual, and an even smaller minority are asexual. "Pansexual" sounds more like someone who is just sexually ambiguous and doesn't want to define themselves as bisexual.

Hope that clears that up...

6 days ago |[YT] | 42