Had a message I wrote for twitter and thought it was right to post it here as well. Love all the people who have supported me and I think you guys deserve this
I always thought twit-longers were mostly cringe, but sometimes you got to be cringe to get your point across.
I don't want to stream, or really play magic anymore.
I always think about my future, how I will move forward in life, what is my end goal, and slowly over a couple years, magic has moved further and further from that life goal. Magic is a game that I love to play, but for me I wanted to keep it being a game. I love playing games, but when a game feels like a job, playing just to hit the amount of hours I feel like I should be playing everyday, rather than playing because I am enjoying myself, why am I playing at all?
This is what streaming made me feel about the game. This was not something that happened for a while, I enjoyed playing both on and off stream all the time for nearly 5+ years, but magic has slowly lost some of its charm for me, and when I am forced to play a game just to keep my life afloat, I am gonna start hating it, and hating doing what I once found some of the most fun times in my life is really sad.
Over the past few weeks I have decided that I am gonna take a step back from streaming, but thinking even more about it, I want to take a step back from magic. I guess for me taking a step back does not mean quitting, I am still gonna play some events that I enjoy, but I am not gonna set 3am alarms like I did in the past. I am still gonna play a league with a deck I think is fun or interesting, but I am not gonna play 4 leagues in a row just so I can say I put in my hours/testing for an event, especially when I am just going through the motions. I am still gonna watch streams/videos that I enjoy, but I am not gonna look at every stream every day, and scour deck lists, just trying to figure out what to play that people want to watch. I am gonna change magic for me, to a game that I enjoy, not a job.
Does this mean I am quitting streaming all together? Probably not, I still want to stream if I think it will be fun for me or some others, but gonna stop doing it every day, and not gonna try to monetize nearly at all. Am I gonna stop posting to youtube? For the most part yes, if I think there is an interesting video I can make, or an interesting league I play I will post it, but a schedule for both is gone.
Not really sure why I am typing all of this to be honest, maybe I just want some likes and retweets for some momentary spot in the limelight. Maybe I just think for all the people that have supported me during these last few years deserve some sort of send off before I leave.
Before I leave I want to address a few more things. First, I have many jobs interviews/offers lined up so gonna be fine financially, not like streaming was making me the big bucks anyways. Second, Hope you guys enjoyed the ride like I did for most of it. I still remember how much I loved to wake up through most of 2020 just playing high level magic in prelims, PTQ's, MOCS events and more almost every single day, and possible that I don't like magic as much anymore since most of that is gone, and playing leagues just feels like wandering in a wasteland rather than a set path that is exciting, fun, and playing for a top spot amongst the best. Third, I don't know if it felt like any of this seems like I could have any mental health issues, but to my knowledge I do not, and I still enjoy life. Just got to move on and get a steady job that can allow me to achieve certain goals I have in the next 5-10 years, and while I do that want to get back to enjoying magic to the fullest, when/if it comes back around.
Maybe I am just rambling too long, but I loved my time, and hope you did to.
Don't really have any desire to make a video today, so just gonna give you guys another trophy run I had with grixis lurrus for tomorrow. Sorry for the lapse in uploads, magic getting a little stale for me at the moment.
Finished making the presentation for the first masterclass video, making it on the grixis lurrus deck I have been playing for the past few weeks. I still have to finish up some recording for it so it will be out sometime thursday/Friday. Got a nice legacy league for those of you wanting some gameplay videos as well coming out tomorrow
Read some comments and though of a new series I could make. A masterclass series that is some 15+ mintue videos talking about a specific deck that I have knowledge about, breaking down the card decisions, why to play the deck, looking at opening hands, sideboard decisions etc. Would you guys be interested in this on a weekly basis? It would mostly be known tier 1/2 decks, with maybe a deck that I put a lot of time into that week that could be random thrown in.
I am thinking of stopping the daily upload of gameplay as people seem to not be very interested in it. Maybe just stick to uploading the weekly slideshow presentations on sunday, and maybe some other content on the side like a reaction video, or some shorts content every few days. I could also just record a bunch of games and maybe do commentary or very a particularly interesting game? Or just upload a single game that is interesting every so often. Not really sure, I just know that people seem to not be watching the gameplay videos anymore
Through multiple cups of tea and some good sleep I was able to record a nice video to be released tomorrow. Hope you guys are ready for. "Why control should never be tier 1"
Planned on working on another presentation video today and tomorrow to put out on Sunday, but ended up getting pretty sick today. Starting to feel better and may be able to work on it tomorrow, but may end up being a week off the presentations.
Spent some time editing a youtube short for the channel. I think it came out great and would love to hear your guys opinion on it when it comes out tomorrow. Expect it around 8am PST. Hope you guys like the new style of content I have been working on lately over just the regular gameplay videos
Accidently recorded my next two gameplay videos with my music being able to be heard. There is gonna be delays on their releases, as I try to use a youtube tool to mute some of the copyright songs from the video. Hope you guys still like them, and the audio still works after using the tool.
Would you guys be interested in more straight to youtube non gameplay videos? This would be in addition to the once a week slideshow prepared videos I post on sundays. I was thinking of more reaction content (somewhat easy to make but still interesting) or maybe some current magic community topic that I see being talked about that I could add my short video take to. Or maybe some other videos you would be interested in seeing. I just want to make content you guys are interested in seeing more often, rather than the low effort videos that come straight from my streams.
Yamakiller
Had a message I wrote for twitter and thought it was right to post it here as well. Love all the people who have supported me and I think you guys deserve this
I always thought twit-longers were mostly cringe, but sometimes you got to be cringe to get your point across.
(Warning: mostly incoherent rambling / insane grammar problems)
I don't want to stream, or really play magic anymore.
I always think about my future, how I will move forward in life, what is my end goal, and slowly over a couple years, magic has moved further and further from that life goal. Magic is a game that I love to play, but for me I wanted to keep it being a game. I love playing games, but when a game feels like a job, playing just to hit the amount of hours I feel like I should be playing everyday, rather than playing because I am enjoying myself, why am I playing at all?
This is what streaming made me feel about the game. This was not something that happened for a while, I enjoyed playing both on and off stream all the time for nearly 5+ years, but magic has slowly lost some of its charm for me, and when I am forced to play a game just to keep my life afloat, I am gonna start hating it, and hating doing what I once found some of the most fun times in my life is really sad.
Over the past few weeks I have decided that I am gonna take a step back from streaming, but thinking even more about it, I want to take a step back from magic. I guess for me taking a step back does not mean quitting, I am still gonna play some events that I enjoy, but I am not gonna set 3am alarms like I did in the past. I am still gonna play a league with a deck I think is fun or interesting, but I am not gonna play 4 leagues in a row just so I can say I put in my hours/testing for an event, especially when I am just going through the motions. I am still gonna watch streams/videos that I enjoy, but I am not gonna look at every stream every day, and scour deck lists, just trying to figure out what to play that people want to watch. I am gonna change magic for me, to a game that I enjoy, not a job.
Does this mean I am quitting streaming all together? Probably not, I still want to stream if I think it will be fun for me or some others, but gonna stop doing it every day, and not gonna try to monetize nearly at all. Am I gonna stop posting to youtube? For the most part yes, if I think there is an interesting video I can make, or an interesting league I play I will post it, but a schedule for both is gone.
Not really sure why I am typing all of this to be honest, maybe I just want some likes and retweets for some momentary spot in the limelight. Maybe I just think for all the people that have supported me during these last few years deserve some sort of send off before I leave.
Before I leave I want to address a few more things. First, I have many jobs interviews/offers lined up so gonna be fine financially, not like streaming was making me the big bucks anyways. Second, Hope you guys enjoyed the ride like I did for most of it. I still remember how much I loved to wake up through most of 2020 just playing high level magic in prelims, PTQ's, MOCS events and more almost every single day, and possible that I don't like magic as much anymore since most of that is gone, and playing leagues just feels like wandering in a wasteland rather than a set path that is exciting, fun, and playing for a top spot amongst the best. Third, I don't know if it felt like any of this seems like I could have any mental health issues, but to my knowledge I do not, and I still enjoy life. Just got to move on and get a steady job that can allow me to achieve certain goals I have in the next 5-10 years, and while I do that want to get back to enjoying magic to the fullest, when/if it comes back around.
Maybe I am just rambling too long, but I loved my time, and hope you did to.
4 years ago | [YT] | 176
View 30 replies
Yamakiller
Don't really have any desire to make a video today, so just gonna give you guys another trophy run I had with grixis lurrus for tomorrow. Sorry for the lapse in uploads, magic getting a little stale for me at the moment.
4 years ago | [YT] | 50
View 3 replies
Yamakiller
Finished making the presentation for the first masterclass video, making it on the grixis lurrus deck I have been playing for the past few weeks. I still have to finish up some recording for it so it will be out sometime thursday/Friday. Got a nice legacy league for those of you wanting some gameplay videos as well coming out tomorrow
4 years ago | [YT] | 39
View 0 replies
Yamakiller
Read some comments and though of a new series I could make. A masterclass series that is some 15+ mintue videos talking about a specific deck that I have knowledge about, breaking down the card decisions, why to play the deck, looking at opening hands, sideboard decisions etc. Would you guys be interested in this on a weekly basis? It would mostly be known tier 1/2 decks, with maybe a deck that I put a lot of time into that week that could be random thrown in.
4 years ago | [YT] | 187
View 40 replies
Yamakiller
I am thinking of stopping the daily upload of gameplay as people seem to not be very interested in it. Maybe just stick to uploading the weekly slideshow presentations on sunday, and maybe some other content on the side like a reaction video, or some shorts content every few days. I could also just record a bunch of games and maybe do commentary or very a particularly interesting game? Or just upload a single game that is interesting every so often. Not really sure, I just know that people seem to not be watching the gameplay videos anymore
4 years ago | [YT] | 35
View 23 replies
Yamakiller
Through multiple cups of tea and some good sleep I was able to record a nice video to be released tomorrow. Hope you guys are ready for. "Why control should never be tier 1"
4 years ago | [YT] | 44
View 1 reply
Yamakiller
Planned on working on another presentation video today and tomorrow to put out on Sunday, but ended up getting pretty sick today. Starting to feel better and may be able to work on it tomorrow, but may end up being a week off the presentations.
4 years ago | [YT] | 19
View 1 reply
Yamakiller
Spent some time editing a youtube short for the channel. I think it came out great and would love to hear your guys opinion on it when it comes out tomorrow. Expect it around 8am PST. Hope you guys like the new style of content I have been working on lately over just the regular gameplay videos
4 years ago | [YT] | 25
View 3 replies
Yamakiller
Accidently recorded my next two gameplay videos with my music being able to be heard. There is gonna be delays on their releases, as I try to use a youtube tool to mute some of the copyright songs from the video. Hope you guys still like them, and the audio still works after using the tool.
4 years ago | [YT] | 23
View 1 reply
Yamakiller
Would you guys be interested in more straight to youtube non gameplay videos? This would be in addition to the once a week slideshow prepared videos I post on sundays. I was thinking of more reaction content (somewhat easy to make but still interesting) or maybe some current magic community topic that I see being talked about that I could add my short video take to. Or maybe some other videos you would be interested in seeing. I just want to make content you guys are interested in seeing more often, rather than the low effort videos that come straight from my streams.
4 years ago | [YT] | 101
View 12 replies
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