My Favorite Groomer

I seem to be finding myself sleeping less at night and more all day long. Which I can’t quite tell if it’s because I am sleeping too late at night or if I am physically just depressed sad and still brokenhearted. I can’t quite tell as it’s morphed into what seems like a cycle now. And today, I was up at 4am trying to turn the humidifier back on as I kept randomly coughing through the night as we go full fledge back into 80 degree days here in Texas!! So it was 78 degrees yesterday and it was supposed to rain and be cold this morning, if it rained I have no idea when. But, I somehow heard it in my mind and stayed in bed and slept until 1pm. The latest I have slept yet. I have no desire to do anything. I must. But, no desire. Work? What’s that? LIVE FEED, what’s that, nope, just pure body refusal. Broke? What’s that and what’s new about it. Ef it, might as well, just sleep it off. hahahaha. My heart still broken. Triggers that make me scream and cry compulsively happen daily. I miss Faith something fierce. Signs she is with me, daily. Signs my mom helped her transition, daily. Just yesterday, in the middle of me stopping vacuuming to go find brownie, he's outside laying in the pea gravel they pee on everyday, uck, I get him, carry him up to the patio, and right there, in between the trees, to the left of the sun setting, around 540pm, is a rainbow. Right, there, in that moment! My mom from our life in Hawaii, and Faith, right there, with birds flying and chirping, yes, I had to sit and take it in. Nothing is a coincidence you know! But, still, I refuse to find happiness. I just still miss my loving Faith so much! I’ll probably post this text to my Youtube since it defines where I am at right now in my life. But, I will start working on the upcoming Sunday, as I have put people on my schedule on purpose, maybe then I will be forced to get to a normal regular daily routine. But, as my heart lies broken, Faiths ashes on my dining table where I hold her close to my heart regularly, I am suffering from severe brokenness. The loss triggered the feeling of losing everyone that I did lose like it happened all over again in some unusual pattern. I find myself doubting what I am doing, where I am supposed to be, and if living in a home I love so much surrounded by every loss memory is even healthy for me (right now, or ever). I have another pup, Saki, as you know, filling the roll of senior pet care and it surely keeps me busy. Also, you know, miracle and her siren of eye problems, which has gone back to normal praise the all mighty Jesus. Her foot is getting better and soon, her cone head will be off again permanently. I thought I was never gonna see a good eye again after all the work I have done with hundreds of meds and eye drops and food cooking recipes over the last 2 years perfecting it, then bam, out of the blue, its a snotty draining eye with no turning back! Saki, though, she is ok now. She had bouts of coughing in the night, so on the 2nd night I changed out the furry new blanket I got for her and one for brownie and the coughing has stopped. Her skin could be better, but it’s almost completed in fixing itself. I would truly like her to be rid of her cone head too, I give her breaks, and mostly she sleeps with it off, forcing me to light sleep to hear for any licking, which I heard last night at 5 am and put it on to stop the compulsive desire to lick until the skin is removed. As I go through this change of not having Faith here and not seeing her I find myself having to rest more, game more, work less, and really follow what my body needs to do daily. I have to cook for 2 dogs and clean and handle the priorites of pet care daily, but, my self care has retracted to just pure rest. And for once in my life, I am accepting it. I am not working through like the loss of Sueii, whom he had a heart attack and I am literally crying and working at the same time; who does that! I decided, it was ok, to not be a super human, and just absorb my loss, face sadness face on, hold on to the dogs that are here tightly, and rest my body mind and soul. I was going to sit down and try to get you all some content today. But, I have now purely seen what I have written and agree, that whatever my body wants, it gets, and it seems to want some coffee, a little sun in the distance, some quiet, some television, and maybe a savvy sandwich for lunch. I am so glad you all know my heart and are here for the long haul. Thank you friends and fans, and I'll be chatting with you soon.

3 days ago | [YT] | 59

My Favorite Groomer

As we pray for Nikki's family member, Spirit Angel's mom isn't doing well and hasn't been doing too well for over 2 months or more now. I am praying for your choices, your travel, as I know you will be trying to get to your mom in this weather, and Jesus I ask you to protect my friend Spirit angel as she makes decisions to be with her mom but for her mom to have your protection with her moms heart disease and the unexpected pneumonia she also got and the ailments that are unexpected that keep popping up for her mom. God please be with this family and please prevent any suffering and give time for everyone to have their moms longer.

1 week ago | [YT] | 36

My Favorite Groomer

Prayers to Nikki and her wife. They are headed to hospital in ambulance. We pray for Nikki’s wife and I am asking you all to say a prayer for her and her wife. May Jesus be kind ana deliver love and health and reversal in whatever health reasons there are May the hands that help heal and help MJ to survive and come home safely. With such a sudden alert god help.

1 week ago | [YT] | 56

My Favorite Groomer

I am blessed that when Faith passed away she let me know through brownie that she would not leave my side as brownie has not left my side and this is not like him. God knows your needs and he will deliver for you. Thank you lord Jesus

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1 week ago | [YT] | 154

My Favorite Groomer

I just have to share after looking, the nearest Starbucks favorites to me that’s open is in Vegas! Hahahaha

1 week ago | [YT] | 10

My Favorite Groomer

Ms Faith will be crossing the rainbow today around 11am. Pray for her little body and spirit and our hearts to heal. Thank you my sweet Faith tor the many many years you loved me so unconditionally. My heart will be broken. Lord Jesus will be there with us and he will be there to guide you home.
I am going to miss you until I see you again. My sweet angel. Your tough spirit and heart is tougher than your little body. I don’t want to say goodbye. You have been so good to me. I love you.

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2 weeks ago | [YT] | 289

My Favorite Groomer

After over 2 years, Davids brother is now in jail for a few months. And if you were wondering here is what happened:
www.instagram.com/p/DS_w5Z-DeGc/

bustednewspaper.com/texas/mar...

www.facebook.com/100068966153...

courtsportal.dallascounty.org/DALLASPROD/Home/Work…

4 weeks ago | [YT] | 47

My Favorite Groomer

Pray for little faith. She’s not doing too well. Pray she can keep her food down and her digestive tract will grow strong it’s been a tough night realizing how she’s feeling might not change. God I pray my faith can perk up and her body will allow her to keep her food down and her bowls will fight what’s bothering them.

4 weeks ago | [YT] | 174

My Favorite Groomer

Light. Now known as Owen.

His mom texted me. Good bless you My friend.

The dogs we have are like secret spys for God. They count our breaths. Hold us. Cry with us. Love us. Stay next to us. Stare into our eyes. Hear us cry, our screams and laughs. Wait for us. They our everything to us. If you have a dog you know exactly what I mean.

Cats can do the same but dogs for me have been kinder and less aggressive. They don’t slap you. Bite you and laugh.😂 dogs just love deeper. Some of you have this kind of love for all pets and all animals can love.

Owen. We miss you and to all of my fans. Happy New Year.

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1 month ago | [YT] | 113

My Favorite Groomer

SKIT tonight at 830pm cst on YouTube after gift opening. See you there!

1 month ago | [YT] | 10