if you've been on self improvement for ages i know exactly what you're going through right now
You’ve had some wins: built a few good habits, maybe quit some of the bad ones. You’re not perfect, but you’ve stuck around and that’s already huge. Most people quit but you haven’t. Every now and then you probably spiral a bit. You think this doesn’t even work and you go fap three times and binge junk food. We all do that because the results don’t come fast enough. We expect instant gratification but self-improvement doesn’t work like that.
You take action, but the results are delayed. That’s the part most people never really talk about. There’s this lag like you’re playing a game with bad internet where you're pressing buttons but nothing’s happening on screen yet. That’s how progress feels at first. You're meditating, hitting the gym, journaling, but no one notices. Nothing changes. And that sucks.
It’s even worse when people treat you the exact same as they did before. Like bro, you’ve changed. Your mindset, your goals, your discipline, it’s all different. You're not that same kid who played video games all day with cummy stains on your pants. But your parents still treat you like you are. Your friends don’t take your goals seriously. Even girls you like still treat you like a loser.
You know what’s happening, right? Just like the results lag behind your actions, people’s perceptions lag behind who you are now. You're here leveled up, ambitious, focused. But they still see you as the old you. There’s this gap. And the problem is, as long as you stay in the same environment, that gap stays open. Because people don’t just see you, they remember you. They remember the version of you from five years ago. Your parents smelt your crusty room. They remember the old habits. Your friends remember you as the gamer spaz who couldn’t talk to girls. And they project that onto you even now.
So how do you update people’s perception of who you are?
You change your environment.
Move somewhere new. When you do that, no one knows the old version of you. They only see who you are right now. And here’s the secret, they believe what you show them. If you show up in a new place with 25% more confidence that becomes their entire understanding of who you are. First impressions stick. They don’t know about your past failures. They don’t know you used to binge goth mommy porn and play RuneScape for 12 hours a day. They just see a confident, self-improving guy.
I did this when I was 19. I moved to university and decided I was going to act like the man I wanted to be. When I walked into my student flat I shook hands confidently. I made eye contact. I held that frame. And people believed it. I didn’t lie I just emphasized the best version of me. No one knew the old me. And the result? I made friends easily. People respected me. Girls were attracted to me. I felt like the main character for the first time in my life.
Then I did it again in my second year, but even harder. I showed up as an even more confident, more dominant version of myself. And it worked even better. Everyone believed it because that’s all they’d ever seen. That’s the power of a fresh environment, it gives you a blank slate. You don’t have to fake anything. You just get to be seen for who you really are now, without the baggage of your past holding you back.
And what’s wild is once you’ve disappeared and changed when you come back to your old environment people are forced to see you differently too. I came back to my family at 22 with a shaved head, a confident posture, after saving a homeless guy’s life and becoming a YouTuber. They couldn’t deny it anymore. I wasn’t the kid playing games in his room. I was a man. But you only get that effect if you disappear first. You have to leave to evolve. Then you come back and force them to see the new you.
I know if you're under 18 you can't easily move out just yet. But I’m telling you this now so that it becomes a goal. Just like you want to hit $5K/month or build a great physique, add this: move away. Change your environment. Give yourself the opportunity to grow without being held back by old labels.
And how do you actually move? One way is university. I don’t personally recommend it unless you're becoming a doctor or something serious, but if you’re going anyway, make sure to move out of your hometown. Stay in student accommodations. Get that social life upgrade without being a degenerate. Don’t commute from home, it’s fucking lame. You’ll miss out on your growth.
But the real answer is to make money online. That’s the best, most freeing option. You make money from your laptop and go live somewhere like Bali. That’s literally what I do. Most of my friends do the same. You wake up, ride your motorbike to a gym in the sun, eat food with no seed oils, journal next to very respectable feminine girls who are also reading books and improving themselves. Everyone around you respects self improvement. They value clean eating, hard work, ambition. You’re no longer the weird kid for not drinking or partying. You’re surrounded by brothers on the same path.
To live a great life here in Bali, $5,000 a month is more than enough. You can scrape by with much less, but $5K gives you total freedom. You can eat at nice places, live well, and still save money. And the best part? You can live with other guys on self-improvement. That’s what I recommend. Solo travel is gay. Move in with other disciplined guys. Keep each other accountable. Grow together.
This part of your journey sucks. You’re grinding and no one sees it. You barely even see it yourself. But you're on the right path. I promise you. It took me nine months before I saw any real progress. Now? I’m rich. I’m jacked. I’ve retired my family. I’m one of the most attractive, confident men alive. That’s ten years of self-improvement. Ten years of hard work when no one was clapping for me.
Grit your teeth and keep going. And when you can, move. Start fresh. Let people see the man you’ve become, not the boy you used to be.
Do the hard work, especially when you don’t feel like it.
If she’s hanging around hoes, she is one too. Simple.
I don’t care how special you think she is, I don’t care if she meditates once a month or occasionally reads a book. If her friends vape, party, cheat, post thirst traps, and do all that low-quality degenerate stuff, so does she (or she will eventually). Because you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.
And don’t lie to yourself thinking you’ll “fix” her. You’re not going to put her on self-improvement. If she wasn’t doing it before she met you, she’s not doing it after. You can try to pull her away from her degen friends, and she’ll pretend like she’s on board. But the moment there’s a rough patch in your relationship? She’s right back to them. And if she’s back with the girls, she’s back to the habits too like drinking, clubbing, entertaining other guys.
Another big red flag: she turns other guys on. That should be obvious. But I’ve seen so many guys allow this to happen and just accept it because they’re “secure.” Nah, bro. That’s not security, that’s weakness. If a guy approaches your girl, that’s fine. It happens. But if she entertains him, if she smiles, giggles, has a little flirty convo, that’s complete betrayal. A respectful girl shuts it down, quick. “Me and my boyfriend come here all the time.” That’s all it takes. But if she hides the fact that she’s taken, even for a second, she’s a hoe. She’s feeding that guy’s ego and his testosterone just for fun. That’s hoe behavior.
I’ve had relationships where a guy approached my girl at the gym, and I watched her engage, point, laugh, act all friendly. That destroyed me. I walked away. I talked to my friends, big so called masculine guys, and they tried to gaslight me like it wasn’t a big deal. But I knew deep down it was a massive deal. Because she spoke to that guy three days in a row. She never once mentioned I was her boyfriend. I ended the relationship then and there. Degen girls will call me over the top, but at least I’m not a cuck.
I’ve seen this multiple times. A girl I'm getting to know entertains other guys, doesn’t mention me, and I instantly lose respect. Because how your girl behaves when you’re not looking tells you everything. If a girl doesn’t rep you in the first ten seconds of conversation with a guy, she’s not wife material.
And social media? Don’t even get me started. If your girl’s posting provocative photos, ass shots, cleavage, thirst traps, then she’s out here turning on other guys on purpose. That’s digital cheating. She’s giving free testosterone boosts to other men, and you’re out here just liking her story thinking everything’s okay.
If she’s snapping guys who’d sleep with her if she bent over, that’s hoe behavior. You know it. She knows it. Every girl knows which guy wants to fuck her. They’re not stupid. They entertain these convos because they love the attention. Don’t let them gaslight you into thinking it’s innocent. If she’s texting dudes that she knows would smash if they had the chance, she’s cheating on you emotionally, and it’s just a matter of time before it becomes physical.
And no, you can’t change her. Don’t play the blue pill game. Don’t think that if you love her enough, if you talk it out and explain your feelings, she’ll stop being a hoe. That’s not how it works. You’re not her savior. And you shouldn’t want to be. If she’s mentally broken, addicted to attention, and texting other dudes for her ego, that’s not your burden to fix.
You need to date girls who already know better than this. Girls who already believe what we’re talking about. Virtuous, religious women who don’t even entertain the idea of talking to random guys who just want to fuck. They’re out there. I’ve met girls like that in places like Bali, girls who come home and tell you first thing when a guy spoke to them. Girls who dress respectfully, not half-naked in ass-revealing shorts. There’s a clear difference between women who crave male attention and those who value modesty and loyalty.
Dressing matters. Don’t let degenerates lie to you. If she says she dresses sexy “for herself,” ask yourself what that even means. Is she looking at herself in the mirror getting turned on? Of course not. She dresses like that for male validation. A respectful woman won’t be putting her ass out on display for every dude to see. That’s just the truth. Modesty reflects character.
Even “good girls” lie. You’d be shocked how many seemingly sweet, artistic, innocent girls are out here doing degen shit behind closed doors. And they use something I call trickle truths. They cheat, or flirt, or fuck another guy and then they tell you “we just kissed.” Then later it becomes, “okay, we cuddled.” Then, “okay, we had sex—but just once!” And eventually it’s, “he came inside me and I might be pregnant and it’s not yours, but I still love you!” That’s how it escalates. You get lied to step by step until you’re crushed.
I’ve seen it. I’ve lived it. My first girlfriend did this to me. I was a sweet, loyal simp bf and she trickle-truthed me into hell. Because I saw firsthand what these girls can do. She told me she was just texting an old friend. Then it was nudes. Then it was sex. And she acted like it was no big deal. That broke me, and I learned. That’s why I’m so redpilled now.
So what do you do about all this? You stop dating hoes. You stop ignoring your gut. You stop negotiating with girls who disrespect you. You don’t fix them, you replace them. With high-quality women who live by the same values as you.
Stop lying to yourself. Average guys out here are getting cheated on or will be soon, and they don’t even know it. They ignore their gut, believe her lies, and get played. Don’t be that average guy.
Do the hard work especially when you don’t feel like it.
here's how I made this transformation, and how you can go from a soft TikTok boy to a masculine, attractive Chad.
First is the halo effect, that psychological reality where attractive people get treated better. It’s unfair but it’s real. Attractive people get more attention, better jobs, better dates, even better treatment in court. So if you want to be respected, loved, and successful, you need to max out your looks. Kids call this looksmaxing, but it's really the art of maximizing your appearance to increase your social and romantic value.
When you’re a teenager the soft TikTok boy aesthetic works. That cute, clean-shaven, floppy-haired look goes viral. But once you're in your 20s, that look doesn’t get respect from other men, and it starts to fall off with women too. At that point, you want to shift into more of a Hollywood movie star look: rugged, masculine, and strong. Think Thor or Superman, not a TikTok e-boy.
If you want to attract the kind of modern, social media obsessed girls, go for the TikTok look. But if you want high-quality women with depth, you need to evolve. You need to build the physique and style that makes men want to be you and women want to be with you. One that commands respect and attention.
The most important part is muscle mass. You need to build an aesthetic physique, not a fat “dad bod,” but the lean, muscular body you’d see on the front of a movie poster. And don’t let anyone fool you about the dad bod. Most of the “dad bods” women post online are actually muscular guys in a bulk phase, sitting at 20% body fat. Real dad bods like the ones with wide hips and soft fat from low testosterone aren’t attractive to anyone.
The amount of muscle you need is going up every year. More guys are in the gym now, more girls are lifting, and the competition is stiffer than ever. If you looked great five years ago, that same physique is now average. There's physique inflation. Add in Instagram thirst traps, global dating apps, and the fact that fitness influencers can DM the girl in your town, and suddenly being lean with a decent chest isn’t enough. You’ve got to stand out.
But not all muscle is created equal. Most guys train for the male gaze like big traps, heavy lifts, boring strength routines. That doesn’t work if you want to look sexy to women. You need to train the seven aesthetic muscles: Neck Upper traps Upper chest Lateral delts Lats Biceps Abs
These are the ones that give you that attractive upper body silhouette. Most cookie-cutter programs you find online completely ignore this and focus too much on triceps, lower chest, or lower back, none of which get you more attention from girls.
Next step: get lean. Specifically, aim for 10–12% body fat. Most guys are far off from this. If you were a pudgy teen like I was, not one of those skinny kids with a six-pack, you’ll have to track your calories like a full-time job. No “intuitive eating,” no winging it. Track every bite. Personally, I get best results when I don’t obsess over macros, just calories and protein. I eat a high-protein diet, about 10 eggs a day (which makes my dick hard as hell lol), and I track my total intake.
When it comes to looking lean all day, you actually want to be “too lean” in the gym. Why? Because without the pump, food bloating, and lighting, your real-life look will be just right. If you’re barely lean enough in the gym, you’ll look soft by the afternoon.
And your face changes when you get lean and change what you eat. When I started eating like a conqueror instead of like a peasant—steak, eggs, meat, and fruit instead of naan, rice, and chickpeas—my face got way more angular. Most brown guys have bloated, round faces not because of genetics, but because of the food. Eat like a Mongol warrior, not like a colonized peasant, and your face will become far more attractive.
With facial hair there’s a sweet spot called the dark stubble. A few days’ growth, around 3mm. That’s been scientifically proven as the most attractive beard length. Clean-shaven can work. Full beards can work if you’ve got the genetics. But most of you watching this? Your facial hair is scraggly, uneven, and it makes you look worse. Either go clean-shaven or maintain controlled stubble. And for the love of God, get a barber. Doing it yourself makes you look low status. A good barber will make your beard look fuller and sharper. Never cheat on your barber.
Stop with the TikTok perms and fluffy hair. As you enter your 20s you need a more masculine, timeless look. Go for something medium-length with a fade on the sides, styled neatly. This haircut has worked for decades and it always will. Don’t go bald unless you’re entering monk mode and intentionally lowering your attractiveness. But also don’t go full TikTok broccoli boy. Aim for the middle: strong, clean, mature.
Fashion is less important than your face and body. Clothes are just the final layer. If you’re ugly and untrained, no outfit will save you. That said, the best fashion is what gives you zero insecurity thoughts. That’s it. If you’re always adjusting your outfit or worried you look gay, ditch it. Wear what gives you Big Dick Energy.
I wear matching gym sets like shorts and shirts that come in the same color and style from sites like Gymshark. They make me feel like a fitness influencer and give me confidence. That confidence is what attracts women, not the pants you’re wearing.
Your Instagram matters. Girls and new friends will stalk it, so make your IG good if you have one. Don’t post grainy mirror selfies in your disgusting crusty bathroom. Take aesthetic, high-status photos. Think about Tinder-style pics: good lighting, solid composition, clean background, confident pose. If it wouldn’t work on a dating app, it won’t work on Instagram either. Pose for the female gaze, not your gym bros.
Looking good isn’t just a vanity project, it’s a cheat code for life. Master your body, your face, your grooming, your wardrobe, and your social media. The rewards are massive.
Do the hard work, especially when you don’t feel like it.
I’d wake up, jack off, binge junk food, skip studying, and felt awkward as hell.
Fast forward to today, I’ve hit every goal I set for my 20s. I want to give you the mindset shifts that helped me go from that mess of a guy to someone who’s consistent, disciplined, and winning in life. These aren’t fluffy tips, they’re real, practical and from experience.
1. DO GOOD HABITS WITH SOMEONE FUNNY If you’re struggling to stay consistent with certain habits like stretching, journaling, or meditation—it’s probably because they’re boring. Most self-improvement habits don’t offer instant dopamine like porn, video games, or junk food. That’s why you quit.
The secret? Do the habit with someone who makes you laugh. Not just anyone, someone actually funny. This changed everything for me. I’ve worked out with serious athletes, smart entrepreneurs, and coaches, and I didn’t get consistent with them. But when I started training with funny friends, it became effortless. My boy Zach and I used to roast each other at the gym, and those sessions were hilarious. It didn’t feel like discipline, it felt like fun. And fun is sustainable.
But one warning, don’t become dependent on that person. In uni, I’d skip gym days just because my friends didn’t want to go. So keep the mindset that you’ll go alone if needed. Ideally, you find someone on your level of self-improvement. That’s rare, though. Most people around you are Jeffreys.
2. MAKE GOOD HABITS OBVIOUS If you want to do a habit more often, make it obvious. I used to forget to take creatine, even though I wanted to. Then I put the tub right on top of my water dispenser. Now I see it every time I get water, and I never forget.
The opposite works too. Want to lower screen time? Make your phone less obvious. Keep it in another room. That one change will literally cut your screen time by 50%. But people resist it. “What about my alarm?” Bro, buy a real alarm clock for $10. You’re not the president. Your notifications can wait. If you’re building a better life, your phone shouldn’t be the first thing you grab in the morning.
Same with flossing. I’ve flossed almost every night for five years. Why? Because it’s right next to my toothbrush. Not hidden in a drawer. Want to weigh your food? Keep your kitchen scale on the counter. Trying to stretch daily? Leave your yoga mat out in your room, not tucked away under your bed.
Don’t rely on willpower. Set your environment up for success.
3. LOWER THE BARRIER FOR SUCCESS When I first tried to meditate, I set the goal at 3 minutes a day. I never hit it. Most days I’d give up in 1-2 minutes and then go smoke weed. That’s how bad it was. I was a fucking junkie in 2020 who couldn’t even sit for three minutes. But now, I meditate consistently. What changed?
I lowered the bar. Instead of trying to do 3 or 5 minutes, I told myself, “Just do 30 seconds.” On any day, no matter how tired or sick I am, I can do 30 seconds. And here’s the beautiful part. Once you start, you often keep going. You sit down for 30 seconds, and next thing you know, you’re there for 5 or 10 minutes.
We trick ourselves with perfectionism. You didn’t go to the gym today, so now you punish yourself with two workouts tomorrow. That’s how you become depressed. You punish your future self instead of just adjusting today’s goal to something manageable.
If you can’t meditate for 10 minutes a day, your goal shouldn’t be 10 minutes. It should be 30 seconds. If you can’t do a full gym workout, your goal should be just to do one set. That’s how momentum builds. Start tiny. Make the win feel easy. Stack those wins. That’s how confidence and consistency are built.
4. USE THE MARINE COMMANDO MINDSET I met this ex-Marine Commando who was literally climbing up the steep cliff side of a mountain while we were all taking the regular path. This guy inspired me, and I later interviewed him. I asked him, “How do you keep going when it gets hard?”
He told me something I already did but hadn’t put into words: focus on the current step.
Let’s say you’ve got leg day today. The thought of doing heavy squats makes you want to bail. But you don’t need to do squats right now. You just need to stand up. Then get changed. Then put your shoes on. Then walk to the gym. By the time you warm up, you’ll want to train. But your brain tricks you by making the task look like a massive monster. You need to break it into smaller steps.
Same with cold approaching a girl. Don’t worry about what to say, just walk toward her. The words will come. Focus on the next task. Not the final one. That’s how Marines, and now I, get things done, even when we don’t feel like it.
So if you’re trying to change your life, here’s what I want you to do: - Pair your hardest habits with someone funny, someone you enjoy doing it with. - Make good habits obvious and bad habits invisible. - Set the smallest possible win and feel proud when you hit it. - And when you’re dreading a task, focus on the current step, not the final outcome.
Do the hard work, especially when you don’t feel like it. That’s how you become the man you want to be.
I went from a weed addicted gooner to a leader helping millions of young guys level up and become the best version of themselves.
Journal these four questions that’ll expose the truth about where you’re at.
HOW DO I ACTUALLY WANT TO LIVE? Forget what your parents want, forget what society wants. Be brutally honest. Maybe you're in a relationship you don't want. Maybe your dream isn’t the one you’ve been chasing. Write the truth.
WHAT’S THE 20% OF MY LIFE CAUSING 80% OF MY PROBLEMS? It’s always just one or two things. A job you hate. An injury stopping you from training. Write those down, and make it a goal to fix them.
WHY AM I NOT SUCCESSFUL YET? Just cut the bullshit. Accept that another young man exactly like you (same age, same race, same background) is already where you dream about being. So why aren’t you? Most likely, you’re just lazy or distracted.
IN WHAT WAYS AM I STILL A PIECE OF SHIT? This one stings. But that’s where the growth happens. Maybe you’re not helping your family. Maybe you disrespected a nice wholesome girl. Face it. Own it.
Now, once you’ve written these out, you’ve got goals and clarity. So what’s next?
Life is a race, and every man is on the track. At the finish line is the dream girl, the dream body, the dream house, the ultimate freedom. Everything you’d ever want. But here’s the harsh truth: this is a PvP race. If you’re slow, another man will beat you to it. He’ll take the girl, house, freedom you wanted. He’ll live the life you dreamed of. And he won’t give a fuck about you.
This isn’t some peaceful, utopian society. It's a brutal competition. The world pretends to be soft and equal, but it’s not. The man who works harder, who runs faster, gets the rewards.
But here’s the twist: some men want you to run faster. I’m one of them. I sound like an asshole sometimes, but I’m trying to push you. I’m doing laps around most men. I’m 27 years old, jacked, millionaire, and charismatic. I don’t have to be here. I’m already financially free. But I want to be here because I know how powerful this race is.
It’s a win-win. When I help you, I feel responsible, I grow too. But be warned: there are others who want you to run slower. Some are your lazy friends, they’re not evil, just losers who don’t want to be left behind. But worse than them are the evil creators. The ones who tell you to slow down while they’re sprinting to the finish line, collecting your rewards. They tell you hard work and self improvement is toxic, that I’m too extreme but they’re making money off that message that leads men astray. They're wolves in sheep's clothing.
You’re in this race whether you like it or not. So run. Hard. And watch who’s helping you and who’s trying to hold you back.
Everything around you is poisoning your brain like phones, TikTok, porn, junk food, gooning. If you just sat and stared at your wall for 30 minutes a day, you'd already improve your life. No joke. Doing nothing is better than doing something destructive.
I used to sit and just think, stare at the wall like a monk. That saved me. Because every second not spent on your phone is healing your brain. Delete Instagram, put your phone in another room, and do nothing. Boredom is now self improvement.
Bonus points if you sit outside and look at the sky. Get sunlight. Ground yourself. This isn’t hippie stuff, it literally boosts serotonin and dopamine naturally. And it’s free.
There’s a debate going around if you should do a morning routine, or should you just get to work? Guys like Ashton Hall (that big black guy all over IG lol) promote long, wholesome routines. But entrepreneurs like Alex Hormozi say “just work.”
Here’s what I think: If you’re broke, if your parents are struggling, if you’re in pain because of a lack of money then yes, just work. Get up, get to it. That’s your duty.
But in the long run, or if you’ve got some stability, do the routine. Wake up, meditate, stretch, get sunlight, smile. That hour you spend taking care of yourself will ripple into better decisions, better emotions, better performance throughout the day. It makes you a better man.
Back in 2020, I was broke, but I still did the morning routine. Meditated, stretched, did gratitude journaling and within a year I was making $15k/month. But then I stopped. I chased the money instead of my mission. I worked first thing in the morning. And yes, I made more money but life got worse. I made worse decisions. I was less happy, less present.
Now, I’m doing the morning routine again. Even just the small things like smiling first thing, stretching, getting sun, counting my blessings, it’s increased my happiness by 50%. Not exaggerating. People in the gym have noticed. Life just feels better.
So unless you're starving for cash, I’d say do the routine. Even if it's just a 2-minute hug with your gf in the morning. That moment alone will change the whole vibe of your relationship. I lost that once, left the girl I loved to chase money and looking back, I’d change that if I could.
Money’s important. No doubt. But if you sacrifice your soul for it, you're no better than a crackhead trading his life for a hit.
You’re in the race whether you like it or not. Most people are self-destructing. You can level up just by not doing what they do. Don’t be one of those fake spiritual retards coping about how “possessions don’t matter.” Run fast. Get the rewards. And when you get them, keep running because the race itself is fun.
Master a craft. Build a body. Build a business. And don’t let lazy, malicious people convince you to slow down. Block them. You’ll thank yourself later.
Do the hard work, especially when you don’t feel like it.
During the COVID lockdown, I went through a self improvement protocol that completely changed my life.
I built the best physique I’d ever had, fixed my mental health, improved my family and social life, and started a business that made me a millionaire.
Back in 2020, there was this trend going around where people would avoid all pleasurable activities one day a week to reset their brains - Dopamine Detoxing. I thought that was fucking stupid lol. Like if a fat guy eats shit six days a week and then eats clean just for one day, he’s still a fatass. So I decided to turn dopamine detox into a daily lifestyle. No “cheat day” fuck that, I lived in a state of constant dopamine detox.
I deleted social media, stopped watching brain dead YouTube videos, only listened to music at the gym, and basically got super vigilant about cutting out bad dopamine. Avoiding things like porn, doom scrolling, junk food. It spikes your dopamine for a second, but then your baseline crashes even lower. You keep repeating this, and over time, your baseline just plummets permanently. That’s why so many guys feel depressed or unmotivated.
Instead of these fake hits of temporary pleasure, I chased good dopamine: hard workouts, sunlight, deep conversations, studying, building a business. Good dopamine takes effort and because of that it raises your baseline happiness. When I started living like this, I felt like a fucking king. Motivation came naturally. I actually wanted to work and go to the gym. And I swear, when you finally cut out that last 10% of degeneracy, whether it's that "one hour" of gaming you bullshit yourself with, or the occasional binge scroll, you unlock a whole new level of happiness.
I created this lifestyle by living like I was in the military. I made a timetable. I wrote out my day from 6 AM to 9 PM and assigned a habit or activity to every single hour. It was like being in school again, when you don’t even have to think you just know what’s next. That structure made it so easy to stay disciplined.
I wasn’t perfect. Most days I only followed it 50%, but even that was 10x better than my usual days. Eventually, I was hitting over 80% consistency. And on the days I felt like the schedule was slipping, I’d literally just sit and stare at the timetable like a psychopath instead of going on my phone. That small autistic act kept me on track.
For mental health, I prioritized five things: meditation, journaling, playfulness, sunlight, and socializing. These might seem soft to some guys who just want to grind, but they’re crucial. Meditation helped me become more mindful and gave me control over my thoughts and impulses. Journaling gave me clarity. Sunlight boosted my mood. Socializing made me feel human again. And playfulness? That’s something you completely forget about when you become an adult. I literally bought gymnastic rings and started working out in the forest like a kid. That playful, joyful energy is what protects your mental health long term.
Therapy for men is a scam and you’re a fucking retard if you think otherwise. It can work for women, who need to be coddled and told everything is ok. But us men need brutal truths. We need to take action. We need a coach, a drill sergeant, a masculine friend to say, “Get your shit together, pussy.” You don’t fix your mental health by talking about problems - that’s weak shit. You fix it by solving them.
Depressed because you’re fat? Shut the fuck up and go to the gym. Depressed because you’re broke? Shut the fuck up and start a business.
Do something. Do anything.
It’s cause and effect. Stop doing the stuff that’s hurting you, start doing the stuff that helps you, and your quality of life explodes. Simple.
In fitness, I went all in. I started doing two workouts a day, one for resistance training, one for cardio. The cardio wasn’t even about losing fat; it was about discipline. While 99% of the world was asleep I’d be waking up at 5 AM to run with a 20kg weighted backpack like a soldier. That discipline shaped me.
I also started eating real food. Cut out all the processed crap and ate like our ancestors. Mainly meat and fish, with some potatoes and vegetables. Nothing fancy, just real organic food. I didn’t binge eat once during this time, which was a huge win for me (I was such a fat fuck I used to binge eat snacks every few days). Meditation helped with that too. It gave me the awareness to stop eating when I was full instead of just demolishing everything in the kitchen.
Sleep was like natural steroids. I set a strict bedtime 9 PM to 6 AM and I stuck to it every single day. No more staying up late gaming or talking to girls. Just discipline. My energy improved, my recovery got better, and I felt sharper every day. I can now fall asleep within 5 minutes of getting into bed.
Finally, I locked in on work. I started my YouTube channel so I could help younger Hamzas, and I took it seriously. After my morning routine, I’d sit down and do deep work: scripting, recording, editing. Two-hour blocks, short breaks, repeat. That built the foundation for a business that’s now made me millions.
All of this, the dopamine detoxing, habits, military timetable. It came together into this perfect storm of transformation. I literally went from a degenerate weed-smoking, porn-watching loser to a disciplined, confident man who’s a leader to millions of men. The change happened fast. One day I moved home and never looked back. I became the guy that took self improvement extremely seriously and rode that momentum for years.
Make the timetable. Set the intention. Plot out your perfect day. Follow it as best you can.
Even if you only hit 50% your life will improve dramatically. And when in doubt, stare at your timetable instead of going on your phone. It’s better to think about what you should be doing than to fall into a content hole.
This is how I became the man I am today. You can do it too.
Now go do the hard work, especially when you don’t feel like it.
I used to fail NoFap every time. Couldn’t even get past Day 3.
I’d start with motivation, but by Day 2 or 3, the urges would be overwhelming like literally walking around with a rock-hard erection, and I’d always relapse. And it wasn’t just a one-time relapse. It’d turn into a full-on gooning session, like, “Well, I’ve already failed today, so might as well keep going and start again tomorrow.” That cycle lasted for years.
But now? I don’t even remember I’m on nofap. It’s like, not even a thing for me anymore. That’s what I call the golden point, when you’ve done it for so long, your brain just doesn’t care anymore, and you can finally focus on a more important goal.
This isn’t going to be one of those posts where I explain why porn is bad, we all know it is. This is straight-up tactical advice that actually worked for me.
STEP 1: GET OFF SOCIAL MEDIA.
When I first started NoFap back in 2015, I believed in the message immediately. I was like, “Yeah, of course porn’s bad.” But I didn’t change anything in my day-to-day life. I’d wake up and scroll Instagram or Reddit, and obviously I’d end up seeing half-naked girls or full-on porn clips, then boom, relapse. I hadn’t removed the trigger.
Social media is softcore porn, plain and simple. Even YouTube sometimes has thumbnails that mess with your brain. That’s why I say something that barely any creator does, I actually want you to stop watching me eventually. Don’t become a consumer. Become a creator. There’s no value in endlessly consuming.
And yeah, I’m biased, I truly believe my content is some of the most helpful on the internet. But the point is: consumption is destroying your focus, your masculinity, your discipline. Be the guy who deletes all that shit.
Be the weird guy who doesn’t use Instagram. Grayscale your phone.
Turn off notifications.
Become remarkable by being disciplined and offline.
STEP 2: DELETE DATING APPS.
Back in Thailand in 2022, I downloaded Tinder just to have fun and ended up spending hours just rotating between apps: Tinder, Bumble, Hinge. Messaging girls nonstop. It became a full-time job. And the energy I felt from those apps? Dirty. Degenerate. Empty.
Some guys can use dating apps properly. I can’t. My pictures are top-tier, I get 100s of MATCHES (not just likes) a day. But it pulls me into this lustful vortex. Even recently, I downloaded Bumble again, and within days, I was back in that low-energy, soul-draining state.
The truth is the girls on those apps are low-quality. Yes, I know how that sounds. But I’ve had enough experience to say that confidently. The wholesome, cute girls, the ones you actually want to build something real with aren’t hanging around Tinder looking to hook up. You meet them at the gym, at wholesome places like a Church, in real life.
There’s something pure about meeting a girl in person, where you lock eyes, you both smile, and it just flows naturally. That doesn’t happen on a screen. You’re not Uber Eats ordering a hookup. You’re supposed to meet women the real way. Like your father did and all his fathers before him.
If you’re still on those apps, stop lying to yourself. “Oh, I’ll just message this one girl then delete it.” That's the fat guy mentality. That’s like saying, “Let me eat this last slice of chocolate cake, then I’ll start my diet tomorrow.” No. The diet starts now.
Just go to the gym and talk to a girl.
Or a health club/spa.
Or, if you’ve got the resources, move to Bali. I’m not joking. Canggu is full of high-vibe, feminine, self-improvement girls. I’m not selling you a dream. I live it. Girls will literally smile at you just for being in a good mood. They value a man who's masculine and hard working. You don’t need dating apps when you’re in a place like that.
These apps are a cancer on your mental health. If you respect yourself, delete them right now.
STEP 3: FILL THE VACUUM WITH SOMETHING MEANINGFUL.
You’ll have extra time now that you’re not gooning for hours.
What should you do with it?
Start a business.
That was a major game-changer for me. Become a content creator. Build something. I have another YouTube channel called Hamza Advanced where I teach this. When you have a business, suddenly your time has value. Your brain shifts. You stop pedestalling women, and you start pedestalling your own mission.
Suddenly, you’re more attractive to women, too. And guess what? That also reduces your urges. Your new obsession becomes progress, not pleasure.
Or, just go workout twice a day. Why the fuck not?
We’ve been conditioned to think one workout a day is enough. That’s BS. Every elite athlete trains multiple times a day. Go lift weights in the morning, then hit cardio in the evening. Go to a mobility or yoga class. Stay at the gym all day. Journal there. Eat there. Work from your laptop there.
Especially if jacking off is the biggest problem in your life right now, then anything else is better. Get up, leave the house, move your body. Your future self will thank you.
STEP 4: WHEN THE URGE HITS, MOVE PHYSICALLY.
Forget the “just breathe deeply” advice. It never worked for me.
What actually worked was noticing where I was when the urge hit. Usually it’s your bed, your desk, your “gooning zone.” The trick? Move with aggression. Don’t sit there thinking, “Let me fight this urge.” Stand the fuck up and leave the room. Go outside. Go to the gym. Go on a walk. Just move.
You’ll never regret walking around your neighbourhood at midnight looking at the stars to resist an urge. But you will regret relapsing and feeling like a piece of shit the next morning.
The reason why two-a-day training is so effective isn’t just the physical aspect, it’s more that it forces you to keep busy, to be productive. You avoid the time and location traps where you’d normally relapse. The more you move, the more you win.
That’s what worked for me. Not fancy tips. Not a 3 minute TikTok vid. Just real, raw action.
Do the hard work, especially when you don’t feel like it.
If you want to attract more girls, it’s not about money, cold approaching, or using dating apps. It’s self-improvement, what I’ve been preaching all these years. You build yourself up in every single area: physically, mentally, emotionally, socially. You hit the gym, you meditate, you eat clean, you reduce screen time, you become disciplined and wholesome. You don’t do this for girls, you do it because it turns you into a man of value.
But here’s where the trap starts. I call it the Self-Improvement Relationship Trap.
You begin to level up. Maybe you used to be a 4/10 in those cringe rating scales, and now you’re a 5.5 or even a 6. So now more girls are into you. But what most guys don’t realize is these girls aren’t worth your time or effort. They’re low quality, the type who vape, party, eat shit food, never exercise, and spend their nights scrolling on social media.
And because you’re still early in your self-improvement journey you don’t realize your value yet. So you fall for the first girl who shows you a bit of attraction. That’s the trap. You settle way too early. You lock in a toxic relationship with someone who’s not growing with you. And guess what happens? Three to six months later, you’ve improved again. You’re leaner, stronger, wiser. But she’s still stuck in the same degenerate habits. She still wants to go clubbing and get pissed drunk. You start feeling that uncomfortable, hard-to-admit truth: “I’m actually far better than her.”
I’ve been there. I've dated girls who I thought were amazing just because they were into me. But in reality they were holding me back. One girl was basically a degen, addicted to partying and alcohol. Another just wanted to smoke weed and do nothing all day. They weren't evil, they just didn’t care about being on a meaningful path in life. And being around them made me worse. I skipped workouts. I stayed up late. I drank and smoked weed. That’s what happens when you get close to people who aren’t on self-improvement: you become exactly like them.
Do you ever notice how disciplined you become when you’re alone and focused? Sleeping early, hitting the gym, eating clean. But spend a few nights with someone who doesn’t care about any of that, and your whole system gets derailed. That’s not a coincidence. It’s a psychological law: you are the average of the people you spend time with.
So when guys say, “Oh I’ll just stay disciplined even if my girlfriend isn’t,” they’re coping. If she vapes, drinks, does drugs, doom scrolls all day, and treats your self-improvement like a quirky hobby instead of respecting it, you’ll start slipping. Slowly. Without even realizing.
And that’s dangerous. Because your progress will slow down. You’ll stagnate. And while you’re plateauing, the alternate version of you that didn’t get into that shit relationship is speeding ahead. He’s building a better life. He’s unlocking a higher quality of women every 6 months. Not just in looks, but in energy, habits, values.
That’s the difference. You’re on this wild path of levelling up, but most people aren’t. So if you settle now, you're literally cashing out early. Like buying Bitcoin at $3k and selling at $5k just because you're too excited at the slightest hint of profit. You should be stoic and holding because YOU are the asset. And you're going to become far more valuable as time goes on.
That’s the male advantage. As men, we become more attractive with age as long as we stay on self-improvement. Women are usually attracted to traits that take ages to develop: discipline, finances, leadership, calmness, emotional maturity. But most guys don’t capitalize on that. They waste their 20s and 30s drinking, gaming, and being lazy. That’s why most 40-year-old men repulse women.
But you? If you stay on this path, sunlight in the morning, lifting heavy, eating clean, leading, healing, you’re going to be in your prime in your 20s and 30s. You’ll be lean, muscular, financially secure, experienced, and wise. You’ll have depth. And that means you’ll attract wife quality women on a completely different level than the ones hitting you up right now.
I’m not saying be alone forever. If you meet a high-quality woman who’s also on self-improvement, who respects your goals, trains, eats clean, reads, is feminine, disciplined, wholesome, then lock her down lol. That’s a black swan. Super rare but possible. Most of the time though, what you’re seeing right now is just lust disguised as love. You’re craving validation. You’re getting a bit of female attention for the first time in your life, and it feels good.
But that doesn’t mean you should settle. Don’t sacrifice your mission for a 6/10 who vapes and Snapchats other guys. Don’t fall into this trap just because you're horny or lonely. If you're going to build something amazing with someone, let it be with someone worthy, someone who pushes you to become the best version of yourself.
You need to have standards. Not the Instagram kind. I’m talking about internal standards like what you accept into your life. Because the truth is, you will become like the person you date. So ask yourself: do I want to become like her? Does she sharpen me or dull me?
This is your life. You have the opportunity to become one of the rare men who actually ascends. Who becomes the top 1%. Who attracts an amazing woman and lives an amazing life. But that only happens if you’re willing to say no to everything that slows you down.
So for now, stay on the path. Build your body. Build your mind. Build your life. Talk to quality girls, be social, get experience, but don’t commit until you meet someone who’s genuinely high quality. Don’t give in to feelings for a degenerate just because she’s the only one who likes you today. You’re becoming something greater. Act like it.
Do the hard work especially when you don’t feel like it.
You’re the most ugly, undisciplined, poorest version of yourself right now. So it’s no surprise you’re only able to attract ugly, braindead, loser girls.
Girls are attracted to you based on your Sexual Market Value:
- Aesthetics (height, face, physique)
- Personality (are you bitch boy, or a dominant action taker)
- Wealth (are you a 9 to 5 wage-cuck, or building your own business)
- Social circle (do you have high class friends, or are you surrounded by Jeffrey losers)
Your SMV increases with age as long as you’re working hard on self improvement. In a few years time you’ll attract much higher quality girls because they see you as 100x desirable than the average cummy stains on pants guy.
A very powerful way to boost how people see you is to be part of a masculine brotherhood with high quality men. You’ll keep each other accountable and love working on your self improvement together. They’ll support you in becoming the best version of yourself, not hold you down like your current loser Discord/video gamer friends do.
Your current friends might go to the gym but they still do all the dirty degenerate habits that repulse you, like jacking off, eating shit, no desire to make money through their own business. How can you ever be seen as a top tier man when all your friends have literally zero SMV?
The simplest way for you to find high tier guys on self improvement is to see if they’re my followers. Because if they are, then you know they watch and follow what I say in my videos, and take self improvement seriously.
They want to achieve supreme health, build a successful business, and date a beautiful feminine girl.
My final advice is to make sure you work hard on achieving your goals of getting rich in your 20s. Otherwise you’ll just end up as a peasant working in a soulless minimum wage job, hoping to retire when you’re 60. Throw yourself in the fast lane and build your own business. I did, and I made $1m profit (not just revenue) in my first year.
If you’ve got no soul and are fine with being a cancer on society go pursue the bullshit all the influencers promote, like dropshipping, OnlyFans managing and NFT/Bitcoin. You’ll end up broke anyway, and you’ll deserve it for being such a retard to believe those liars.
But if you have more than a double digit IQ just do the exact same business model as me: make educational content, then sell a high quality product to your followers. You know it works because it's literally what I'm doing to this day.
You don’t need a university degree or commit to a life of boredom and depression like you would with normal jobs. Your work will be very purposeful; you’ll genuinely be changing the lives of your fans and customers, and making a ton of money.
If you’re not a pussy bitch, take action right now.
Hamza
Hamza
if you've been on self improvement for ages
i know exactly what you're going through right now
You’ve had some wins: built a few good habits, maybe quit some of the bad ones. You’re not perfect, but you’ve stuck around and that’s already huge. Most people quit but you haven’t. Every now and then you probably spiral a bit. You think this doesn’t even work and you go fap three times and binge junk food. We all do that because the results don’t come fast enough. We expect instant gratification but self-improvement doesn’t work like that.
You take action, but the results are delayed. That’s the part most people never really talk about. There’s this lag like you’re playing a game with bad internet where you're pressing buttons but nothing’s happening on screen yet. That’s how progress feels at first. You're meditating, hitting the gym, journaling, but no one notices. Nothing changes. And that sucks.
It’s even worse when people treat you the exact same as they did before. Like bro, you’ve changed. Your mindset, your goals, your discipline, it’s all different. You're not that same kid who played video games all day with cummy stains on your pants. But your parents still treat you like you are. Your friends don’t take your goals seriously. Even girls you like still treat you like a loser.
You know what’s happening, right? Just like the results lag behind your actions, people’s perceptions lag behind who you are now. You're here leveled up, ambitious, focused. But they still see you as the old you. There’s this gap. And the problem is, as long as you stay in the same environment, that gap stays open. Because people don’t just see you, they remember you. They remember the version of you from five years ago. Your parents smelt your crusty room. They remember the old habits. Your friends remember you as the gamer spaz who couldn’t talk to girls. And they project that onto you even now.
So how do you update people’s perception of who you are?
You change your environment.
Move somewhere new. When you do that, no one knows the old version of you. They only see who you are right now. And here’s the secret, they believe what you show them. If you show up in a new place with 25% more confidence that becomes their entire understanding of who you are. First impressions stick. They don’t know about your past failures. They don’t know you used to binge goth mommy porn and play RuneScape for 12 hours a day. They just see a confident, self-improving guy.
I did this when I was 19. I moved to university and decided I was going to act like the man I wanted to be. When I walked into my student flat I shook hands confidently. I made eye contact. I held that frame. And people believed it. I didn’t lie I just emphasized the best version of me. No one knew the old me. And the result? I made friends easily. People respected me. Girls were attracted to me. I felt like the main character for the first time in my life.
Then I did it again in my second year, but even harder. I showed up as an even more confident, more dominant version of myself. And it worked even better. Everyone believed it because that’s all they’d ever seen. That’s the power of a fresh environment, it gives you a blank slate. You don’t have to fake anything. You just get to be seen for who you really are now, without the baggage of your past holding you back.
And what’s wild is once you’ve disappeared and changed when you come back to your old environment people are forced to see you differently too. I came back to my family at 22 with a shaved head, a confident posture, after saving a homeless guy’s life and becoming a YouTuber. They couldn’t deny it anymore. I wasn’t the kid playing games in his room. I was a man. But you only get that effect if you disappear first. You have to leave to evolve. Then you come back and force them to see the new you.
I know if you're under 18 you can't easily move out just yet. But I’m telling you this now so that it becomes a goal. Just like you want to hit $5K/month or build a great physique, add this: move away. Change your environment. Give yourself the opportunity to grow without being held back by old labels.
And how do you actually move? One way is university. I don’t personally recommend it unless you're becoming a doctor or something serious, but if you’re going anyway, make sure to move out of your hometown. Stay in student accommodations. Get that social life upgrade without being a degenerate. Don’t commute from home, it’s fucking lame. You’ll miss out on your growth.
But the real answer is to make money online. That’s the best, most freeing option. You make money from your laptop and go live somewhere like Bali. That’s literally what I do. Most of my friends do the same. You wake up, ride your motorbike to a gym in the sun, eat food with no seed oils, journal next to very respectable feminine girls who are also reading books and improving themselves. Everyone around you respects self improvement. They value clean eating, hard work, ambition. You’re no longer the weird kid for not drinking or partying. You’re surrounded by brothers on the same path.
To live a great life here in Bali, $5,000 a month is more than enough. You can scrape by with much less, but $5K gives you total freedom. You can eat at nice places, live well, and still save money. And the best part? You can live with other guys on self-improvement. That’s what I recommend. Solo travel is gay. Move in with other disciplined guys. Keep each other accountable. Grow together.
This part of your journey sucks. You’re grinding and no one sees it. You barely even see it yourself. But you're on the right path. I promise you. It took me nine months before I saw any real progress. Now? I’m rich. I’m jacked. I’ve retired my family. I’m one of the most attractive, confident men alive. That’s ten years of self-improvement. Ten years of hard work when no one was clapping for me.
Grit your teeth and keep going. And when you can, move. Start fresh. Let people see the man you’ve become, not the boy you used to be.
Do the hard work, especially when you don’t feel like it.
2 hours ago | [YT] | 211
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Hamza
If she’s hanging around hoes, she is one too. Simple.
I don’t care how special you think she is, I don’t care if she meditates once a month or occasionally reads a book. If her friends vape, party, cheat, post thirst traps, and do all that low-quality degenerate stuff, so does she (or she will eventually). Because you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.
And don’t lie to yourself thinking you’ll “fix” her. You’re not going to put her on self-improvement. If she wasn’t doing it before she met you, she’s not doing it after. You can try to pull her away from her degen friends, and she’ll pretend like she’s on board. But the moment there’s a rough patch in your relationship? She’s right back to them. And if she’s back with the girls, she’s back to the habits too like drinking, clubbing, entertaining other guys.
Another big red flag: she turns other guys on. That should be obvious. But I’ve seen so many guys allow this to happen and just accept it because they’re “secure.” Nah, bro. That’s not security, that’s weakness. If a guy approaches your girl, that’s fine. It happens. But if she entertains him, if she smiles, giggles, has a little flirty convo, that’s complete betrayal. A respectful girl shuts it down, quick. “Me and my boyfriend come here all the time.” That’s all it takes. But if she hides the fact that she’s taken, even for a second, she’s a hoe. She’s feeding that guy’s ego and his testosterone just for fun. That’s hoe behavior.
I’ve had relationships where a guy approached my girl at the gym, and I watched her engage, point, laugh, act all friendly. That destroyed me. I walked away. I talked to my friends, big so called masculine guys, and they tried to gaslight me like it wasn’t a big deal. But I knew deep down it was a massive deal. Because she spoke to that guy three days in a row. She never once mentioned I was her boyfriend. I ended the relationship then and there. Degen girls will call me over the top, but at least I’m not a cuck.
I’ve seen this multiple times. A girl I'm getting to know entertains other guys, doesn’t mention me, and I instantly lose respect. Because how your girl behaves when you’re not looking tells you everything. If a girl doesn’t rep you in the first ten seconds of conversation with a guy, she’s not wife material.
And social media? Don’t even get me started. If your girl’s posting provocative photos, ass shots, cleavage, thirst traps, then she’s out here turning on other guys on purpose. That’s digital cheating. She’s giving free testosterone boosts to other men, and you’re out here just liking her story thinking everything’s okay.
If she’s snapping guys who’d sleep with her if she bent over, that’s hoe behavior. You know it. She knows it. Every girl knows which guy wants to fuck her. They’re not stupid. They entertain these convos because they love the attention. Don’t let them gaslight you into thinking it’s innocent. If she’s texting dudes that she knows would smash if they had the chance, she’s cheating on you emotionally, and it’s just a matter of time before it becomes physical.
And no, you can’t change her. Don’t play the blue pill game. Don’t think that if you love her enough, if you talk it out and explain your feelings, she’ll stop being a hoe. That’s not how it works. You’re not her savior. And you shouldn’t want to be. If she’s mentally broken, addicted to attention, and texting other dudes for her ego, that’s not your burden to fix.
You need to date girls who already know better than this. Girls who already believe what we’re talking about. Virtuous, religious women who don’t even entertain the idea of talking to random guys who just want to fuck. They’re out there. I’ve met girls like that in places like Bali, girls who come home and tell you first thing when a guy spoke to them. Girls who dress respectfully, not half-naked in ass-revealing shorts. There’s a clear difference between women who crave male attention and those who value modesty and loyalty.
Dressing matters. Don’t let degenerates lie to you. If she says she dresses sexy “for herself,” ask yourself what that even means. Is she looking at herself in the mirror getting turned on? Of course not. She dresses like that for male validation. A respectful woman won’t be putting her ass out on display for every dude to see. That’s just the truth. Modesty reflects character.
Even “good girls” lie. You’d be shocked how many seemingly sweet, artistic, innocent girls are out here doing degen shit behind closed doors. And they use something I call trickle truths.
They cheat, or flirt, or fuck another guy and then they tell you “we just kissed.”
Then later it becomes, “okay, we cuddled.”
Then, “okay, we had sex—but just once!”
And eventually it’s, “he came inside me and I might be pregnant and it’s not yours, but I still love you!”
That’s how it escalates. You get lied to step by step until you’re crushed.
I’ve seen it. I’ve lived it. My first girlfriend did this to me. I was a sweet, loyal simp bf and she trickle-truthed me into hell. Because I saw firsthand what these girls can do.
She told me she was just texting an old friend.
Then it was nudes.
Then it was sex.
And she acted like it was no big deal. That broke me, and I learned. That’s why I’m so redpilled now.
So what do you do about all this? You stop dating hoes. You stop ignoring your gut. You stop negotiating with girls who disrespect you. You don’t fix them, you replace them. With high-quality women who live by the same values as you.
Stop lying to yourself. Average guys out here are getting cheated on or will be soon, and they don’t even know it. They ignore their gut, believe her lies, and get played. Don’t be that average guy.
Do the hard work especially when you don’t feel like it.
2 days ago (edited) | [YT] | 1,711
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Hamza
here's how I made this transformation, and how you can go from a soft TikTok boy to a masculine, attractive Chad.
First is the halo effect, that psychological reality where attractive people get treated better. It’s unfair but it’s real. Attractive people get more attention, better jobs, better dates, even better treatment in court. So if you want to be respected, loved, and successful, you need to max out your looks. Kids call this looksmaxing, but it's really the art of maximizing your appearance to increase your social and romantic value.
When you’re a teenager the soft TikTok boy aesthetic works. That cute, clean-shaven, floppy-haired look goes viral. But once you're in your 20s, that look doesn’t get respect from other men, and it starts to fall off with women too. At that point, you want to shift into more of a Hollywood movie star look: rugged, masculine, and strong. Think Thor or Superman, not a TikTok e-boy.
If you want to attract the kind of modern, social media obsessed girls, go for the TikTok look. But if you want high-quality women with depth, you need to evolve. You need to build the physique and style that makes men want to be you and women want to be with you. One that commands respect and attention.
The most important part is muscle mass. You need to build an aesthetic physique, not a fat “dad bod,” but the lean, muscular body you’d see on the front of a movie poster. And don’t let anyone fool you about the dad bod. Most of the “dad bods” women post online are actually muscular guys in a bulk phase, sitting at 20% body fat. Real dad bods like the ones with wide hips and soft fat from low testosterone aren’t attractive to anyone.
The amount of muscle you need is going up every year. More guys are in the gym now, more girls are lifting, and the competition is stiffer than ever. If you looked great five years ago, that same physique is now average. There's physique inflation. Add in Instagram thirst traps, global dating apps, and the fact that fitness influencers can DM the girl in your town, and suddenly being lean with a decent chest isn’t enough. You’ve got to stand out.
But not all muscle is created equal. Most guys train for the male gaze like big traps, heavy lifts, boring strength routines. That doesn’t work if you want to look sexy to women. You need to train the seven aesthetic muscles:
Neck
Upper traps
Upper chest
Lateral delts
Lats
Biceps
Abs
These are the ones that give you that attractive upper body silhouette. Most cookie-cutter programs you find online completely ignore this and focus too much on triceps, lower chest, or lower back, none of which get you more attention from girls.
Next step: get lean. Specifically, aim for 10–12% body fat. Most guys are far off from this. If you were a pudgy teen like I was, not one of those skinny kids with a six-pack, you’ll have to track your calories like a full-time job. No “intuitive eating,” no winging it. Track every bite. Personally, I get best results when I don’t obsess over macros, just calories and protein. I eat a high-protein diet, about 10 eggs a day (which makes my dick hard as hell lol), and I track my total intake.
When it comes to looking lean all day, you actually want to be “too lean” in the gym. Why? Because without the pump, food bloating, and lighting, your real-life look will be just right. If you’re barely lean enough in the gym, you’ll look soft by the afternoon.
And your face changes when you get lean and change what you eat. When I started eating like a conqueror instead of like a peasant—steak, eggs, meat, and fruit instead of naan, rice, and chickpeas—my face got way more angular. Most brown guys have bloated, round faces not because of genetics, but because of the food. Eat like a Mongol warrior, not like a colonized peasant, and your face will become far more attractive.
With facial hair there’s a sweet spot called the dark stubble. A few days’ growth, around 3mm. That’s been scientifically proven as the most attractive beard length. Clean-shaven can work. Full beards can work if you’ve got the genetics. But most of you watching this? Your facial hair is scraggly, uneven, and it makes you look worse. Either go clean-shaven or maintain controlled stubble. And for the love of God, get a barber. Doing it yourself makes you look low status. A good barber will make your beard look fuller and sharper. Never cheat on your barber.
Stop with the TikTok perms and fluffy hair. As you enter your 20s you need a more masculine, timeless look. Go for something medium-length with a fade on the sides, styled neatly. This haircut has worked for decades and it always will. Don’t go bald unless you’re entering monk mode and intentionally lowering your attractiveness. But also don’t go full TikTok broccoli boy. Aim for the middle: strong, clean, mature.
Fashion is less important than your face and body. Clothes are just the final layer. If you’re ugly and untrained, no outfit will save you. That said, the best fashion is what gives you zero insecurity thoughts. That’s it. If you’re always adjusting your outfit or worried you look gay, ditch it. Wear what gives you Big Dick Energy.
I wear matching gym sets like shorts and shirts that come in the same color and style from sites like Gymshark. They make me feel like a fitness influencer and give me confidence. That confidence is what attracts women, not the pants you’re wearing.
Your Instagram matters. Girls and new friends will stalk it, so make your IG good if you have one. Don’t post grainy mirror selfies in your disgusting crusty bathroom. Take aesthetic, high-status photos. Think about Tinder-style pics: good lighting, solid composition, clean background, confident pose. If it wouldn’t work on a dating app, it won’t work on Instagram either. Pose for the female gaze, not your gym bros.
Looking good isn’t just a vanity project, it’s a cheat code for life. Master your body, your face, your grooming, your wardrobe, and your social media. The rewards are massive.
Do the hard work, especially when you don’t feel like it.
4 days ago | [YT] | 1,329
View 118 replies
Hamza
eight years ago I was the ultimate degenerate
I’d wake up, jack off, binge junk food, skip studying, and felt awkward as hell.
Fast forward to today, I’ve hit every goal I set for my 20s. I want to give you the mindset shifts that helped me go from that mess of a guy to someone who’s consistent, disciplined, and winning in life. These aren’t fluffy tips, they’re real, practical and from experience.
1. DO GOOD HABITS WITH SOMEONE FUNNY
If you’re struggling to stay consistent with certain habits like stretching, journaling, or meditation—it’s probably because they’re boring. Most self-improvement habits don’t offer instant dopamine like porn, video games, or junk food. That’s why you quit.
The secret? Do the habit with someone who makes you laugh. Not just anyone, someone actually funny. This changed everything for me. I’ve worked out with serious athletes, smart entrepreneurs, and coaches, and I didn’t get consistent with them. But when I started training with funny friends, it became effortless. My boy Zach and I used to roast each other at the gym, and those sessions were hilarious. It didn’t feel like discipline, it felt like fun. And fun is sustainable.
But one warning, don’t become dependent on that person. In uni, I’d skip gym days just because my friends didn’t want to go. So keep the mindset that you’ll go alone if needed. Ideally, you find someone on your level of self-improvement. That’s rare, though. Most people around you are Jeffreys.
2. MAKE GOOD HABITS OBVIOUS
If you want to do a habit more often, make it obvious. I used to forget to take creatine, even though I wanted to. Then I put the tub right on top of my water dispenser. Now I see it every time I get water, and I never forget.
The opposite works too. Want to lower screen time? Make your phone less obvious. Keep it in another room. That one change will literally cut your screen time by 50%. But people resist it. “What about my alarm?” Bro, buy a real alarm clock for $10. You’re not the president. Your notifications can wait. If you’re building a better life, your phone shouldn’t be the first thing you grab in the morning.
Same with flossing. I’ve flossed almost every night for five years. Why? Because it’s right next to my toothbrush. Not hidden in a drawer.
Want to weigh your food? Keep your kitchen scale on the counter.
Trying to stretch daily? Leave your yoga mat out in your room, not tucked away under your bed.
Don’t rely on willpower. Set your environment up for success.
3. LOWER THE BARRIER FOR SUCCESS
When I first tried to meditate, I set the goal at 3 minutes a day. I never hit it. Most days I’d give up in 1-2 minutes and then go smoke weed. That’s how bad it was. I was a fucking junkie in 2020 who couldn’t even sit for three minutes. But now, I meditate consistently. What changed?
I lowered the bar. Instead of trying to do 3 or 5 minutes, I told myself, “Just do 30 seconds.” On any day, no matter how tired or sick I am, I can do 30 seconds. And here’s the beautiful part. Once you start, you often keep going. You sit down for 30 seconds, and next thing you know, you’re there for 5 or 10 minutes.
We trick ourselves with perfectionism. You didn’t go to the gym today, so now you punish yourself with two workouts tomorrow. That’s how you become depressed. You punish your future self instead of just adjusting today’s goal to something manageable.
If you can’t meditate for 10 minutes a day, your goal shouldn’t be 10 minutes. It should be 30 seconds. If you can’t do a full gym workout, your goal should be just to do one set. That’s how momentum builds. Start tiny. Make the win feel easy. Stack those wins. That’s how confidence and consistency are built.
4. USE THE MARINE COMMANDO MINDSET
I met this ex-Marine Commando who was literally climbing up the steep cliff side of a mountain while we were all taking the regular path. This guy inspired me, and I later interviewed him. I asked him, “How do you keep going when it gets hard?”
He told me something I already did but hadn’t put into words: focus on the current step.
Let’s say you’ve got leg day today. The thought of doing heavy squats makes you want to bail. But you don’t need to do squats right now. You just need to stand up. Then get changed. Then put your shoes on. Then walk to the gym. By the time you warm up, you’ll want to train. But your brain tricks you by making the task look like a massive monster. You need to break it into smaller steps.
Same with cold approaching a girl. Don’t worry about what to say, just walk toward her. The words will come. Focus on the next task. Not the final one. That’s how Marines, and now I, get things done, even when we don’t feel like it.
So if you’re trying to change your life, here’s what I want you to do:
- Pair your hardest habits with someone funny, someone you enjoy doing it with.
- Make good habits obvious and bad habits invisible.
- Set the smallest possible win and feel proud when you hit it.
- And when you’re dreading a task, focus on the current step, not the final outcome.
Do the hard work, especially when you don’t feel like it. That’s how you become the man you want to be.
6 days ago | [YT] | 1,412
View 44 replies
Hamza
I went from a weed addicted gooner to a leader helping millions of young guys level up and become the best version of themselves.
Journal these four questions that’ll expose the truth about where you’re at.
HOW DO I ACTUALLY WANT TO LIVE?
Forget what your parents want, forget what society wants. Be brutally honest. Maybe you're in a relationship you don't want. Maybe your dream isn’t the one you’ve been chasing. Write the truth.
WHAT’S THE 20% OF MY LIFE CAUSING 80% OF MY PROBLEMS?
It’s always just one or two things. A job you hate. An injury stopping you from training. Write those down, and make it a goal to fix them.
WHY AM I NOT SUCCESSFUL YET?
Just cut the bullshit. Accept that another young man exactly like you (same age, same race, same background) is already where you dream about being. So why aren’t you? Most likely, you’re just lazy or distracted.
IN WHAT WAYS AM I STILL A PIECE OF SHIT?
This one stings. But that’s where the growth happens. Maybe you’re not helping your family. Maybe you disrespected a nice wholesome girl. Face it. Own it.
Now, once you’ve written these out, you’ve got goals and clarity. So what’s next?
Life is a race, and every man is on the track. At the finish line is the dream girl, the dream body, the dream house, the ultimate freedom. Everything you’d ever want. But here’s the harsh truth: this is a PvP race. If you’re slow, another man will beat you to it. He’ll take the girl, house, freedom you wanted. He’ll live the life you dreamed of. And he won’t give a fuck about you.
This isn’t some peaceful, utopian society. It's a brutal competition. The world pretends to be soft and equal, but it’s not. The man who works harder, who runs faster, gets the rewards.
But here’s the twist: some men want you to run faster. I’m one of them. I sound like an asshole sometimes, but I’m trying to push you. I’m doing laps around most men. I’m 27 years old, jacked, millionaire, and charismatic. I don’t have to be here. I’m already financially free. But I want to be here because I know how powerful this race is.
It’s a win-win. When I help you, I feel responsible, I grow too. But be warned: there are others who want you to run slower. Some are your lazy friends, they’re not evil, just losers who don’t want to be left behind. But worse than them are the evil creators. The ones who tell you to slow down while they’re sprinting to the finish line, collecting your rewards. They tell you hard work and self improvement is toxic, that I’m too extreme but they’re making money off that message that leads men astray. They're wolves in sheep's clothing.
You’re in this race whether you like it or not. So run. Hard. And watch who’s helping you and who’s trying to hold you back.
Everything around you is poisoning your brain like phones, TikTok, porn, junk food, gooning. If you just sat and stared at your wall for 30 minutes a day, you'd already improve your life. No joke. Doing nothing is better than doing something destructive.
I used to sit and just think, stare at the wall like a monk. That saved me. Because every second not spent on your phone is healing your brain. Delete Instagram, put your phone in another room, and do nothing. Boredom is now self improvement.
Bonus points if you sit outside and look at the sky. Get sunlight. Ground yourself. This isn’t hippie stuff, it literally boosts serotonin and dopamine naturally. And it’s free.
There’s a debate going around if you should do a morning routine, or should you just get to work? Guys like Ashton Hall (that big black guy all over IG lol) promote long, wholesome routines. But entrepreneurs like Alex Hormozi say “just work.”
Here’s what I think:
If you’re broke, if your parents are struggling, if you’re in pain because of a lack of money then yes, just work. Get up, get to it. That’s your duty.
But in the long run, or if you’ve got some stability, do the routine. Wake up, meditate, stretch, get sunlight, smile. That hour you spend taking care of yourself will ripple into better decisions, better emotions, better performance throughout the day. It makes you a better man.
Back in 2020, I was broke, but I still did the morning routine. Meditated, stretched, did gratitude journaling and within a year I was making $15k/month. But then I stopped. I chased the money instead of my mission. I worked first thing in the morning. And yes, I made more money but life got worse. I made worse decisions. I was less happy, less present.
Now, I’m doing the morning routine again. Even just the small things like smiling first thing, stretching, getting sun, counting my blessings, it’s increased my happiness by 50%. Not exaggerating. People in the gym have noticed. Life just feels better.
So unless you're starving for cash, I’d say do the routine. Even if it's just a 2-minute hug with your gf in the morning. That moment alone will change the whole vibe of your relationship. I lost that once, left the girl I loved to chase money and looking back, I’d change that if I could.
Money’s important. No doubt. But if you sacrifice your soul for it, you're no better than a crackhead trading his life for a hit.
You’re in the race whether you like it or not. Most people are self-destructing. You can level up just by not doing what they do. Don’t be one of those fake spiritual retards coping about how “possessions don’t matter.” Run fast. Get the rewards. And when you get them, keep running because the race itself is fun.
Master a craft. Build a body. Build a business. And don’t let lazy, malicious people convince you to slow down. Block them. You’ll thank yourself later.
Do the hard work, especially when you don’t feel like it.
1 week ago | [YT] | 1,494
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Hamza
During the COVID lockdown, I went through a self improvement protocol that completely changed my life.
I built the best physique I’d ever had, fixed my mental health, improved my family and social life, and started a business that made me a millionaire.
Back in 2020, there was this trend going around where people would avoid all pleasurable activities one day a week to reset their brains - Dopamine Detoxing. I thought that was fucking stupid lol. Like if a fat guy eats shit six days a week and then eats clean just for one day, he’s still a fatass. So I decided to turn dopamine detox into a daily lifestyle. No “cheat day” fuck that, I lived in a state of constant dopamine detox.
I deleted social media, stopped watching brain dead YouTube videos, only listened to music at the gym, and basically got super vigilant about cutting out bad dopamine. Avoiding things like porn, doom scrolling, junk food. It spikes your dopamine for a second, but then your baseline crashes even lower. You keep repeating this, and over time, your baseline just plummets permanently. That’s why so many guys feel depressed or unmotivated.
Instead of these fake hits of temporary pleasure, I chased good dopamine: hard workouts, sunlight, deep conversations, studying, building a business. Good dopamine takes effort and because of that it raises your baseline happiness. When I started living like this, I felt like a fucking king. Motivation came naturally. I actually wanted to work and go to the gym. And I swear, when you finally cut out that last 10% of degeneracy, whether it's that "one hour" of gaming you bullshit yourself with, or the occasional binge scroll, you unlock a whole new level of happiness.
I created this lifestyle by living like I was in the military. I made a timetable. I wrote out my day from 6 AM to 9 PM and assigned a habit or activity to every single hour. It was like being in school again, when you don’t even have to think you just know what’s next. That structure made it so easy to stay disciplined.
I wasn’t perfect. Most days I only followed it 50%, but even that was 10x better than my usual days. Eventually, I was hitting over 80% consistency. And on the days I felt like the schedule was slipping, I’d literally just sit and stare at the timetable like a psychopath instead of going on my phone. That small autistic act kept me on track.
For mental health, I prioritized five things: meditation, journaling, playfulness, sunlight, and socializing. These might seem soft to some guys who just want to grind, but they’re crucial. Meditation helped me become more mindful and gave me control over my thoughts and impulses. Journaling gave me clarity. Sunlight boosted my mood. Socializing made me feel human again. And playfulness? That’s something you completely forget about when you become an adult. I literally bought gymnastic rings and started working out in the forest like a kid. That playful, joyful energy is what protects your mental health long term.
Therapy for men is a scam and you’re a fucking retard if you think otherwise. It can work for women, who need to be coddled and told everything is ok. But us men need brutal truths. We need to take action. We need a coach, a drill sergeant, a masculine friend to say, “Get your shit together, pussy.” You don’t fix your mental health by talking about problems - that’s weak shit. You fix it by solving them.
Depressed because you’re fat? Shut the fuck up and go to the gym.
Depressed because you’re broke? Shut the fuck up and start a business.
Do something. Do anything.
It’s cause and effect. Stop doing the stuff that’s hurting you, start doing the stuff that helps you, and your quality of life explodes. Simple.
In fitness, I went all in. I started doing two workouts a day, one for resistance training, one for cardio. The cardio wasn’t even about losing fat; it was about discipline. While 99% of the world was asleep I’d be waking up at 5 AM to run with a 20kg weighted backpack like a soldier. That discipline shaped me.
I also started eating real food. Cut out all the processed crap and ate like our ancestors. Mainly meat and fish, with some potatoes and vegetables. Nothing fancy, just real organic food. I didn’t binge eat once during this time, which was a huge win for me (I was such a fat fuck I used to binge eat snacks every few days). Meditation helped with that too. It gave me the awareness to stop eating when I was full instead of just demolishing everything in the kitchen.
Sleep was like natural steroids. I set a strict bedtime 9 PM to 6 AM and I stuck to it every single day. No more staying up late gaming or talking to girls. Just discipline. My energy improved, my recovery got better, and I felt sharper every day. I can now fall asleep within 5 minutes of getting into bed.
Finally, I locked in on work. I started my YouTube channel so I could help younger Hamzas, and I took it seriously. After my morning routine, I’d sit down and do deep work: scripting, recording, editing. Two-hour blocks, short breaks, repeat. That built the foundation for a business that’s now made me millions.
All of this, the dopamine detoxing, habits, military timetable. It came together into this perfect storm of transformation. I literally went from a degenerate weed-smoking, porn-watching loser to a disciplined, confident man who’s a leader to millions of men. The change happened fast. One day I moved home and never looked back. I became the guy that took self improvement extremely seriously and rode that momentum for years.
Make the timetable.
Set the intention.
Plot out your perfect day.
Follow it as best you can.
Even if you only hit 50% your life will improve dramatically. And when in doubt, stare at your timetable instead of going on your phone. It’s better to think about what you should be doing than to fall into a content hole.
This is how I became the man I am today. You can do it too.
Now go do the hard work, especially when you don’t feel like it.
1 week ago (edited) | [YT] | 1,547
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Hamza
I used to fail NoFap every time. Couldn’t even get past Day 3.
I’d start with motivation, but by Day 2 or 3, the urges would be overwhelming like literally walking around with a rock-hard erection, and I’d always relapse. And it wasn’t just a one-time relapse. It’d turn into a full-on gooning session, like, “Well, I’ve already failed today, so might as well keep going and start again tomorrow.” That cycle lasted for years.
But now? I don’t even remember I’m on nofap. It’s like, not even a thing for me anymore. That’s what I call the golden point, when you’ve done it for so long, your brain just doesn’t care anymore, and you can finally focus on a more important goal.
This isn’t going to be one of those posts where I explain why porn is bad, we all know it is. This is straight-up tactical advice that actually worked for me.
STEP 1: GET OFF SOCIAL MEDIA.
When I first started NoFap back in 2015, I believed in the message immediately. I was like, “Yeah, of course porn’s bad.” But I didn’t change anything in my day-to-day life. I’d wake up and scroll Instagram or Reddit, and obviously I’d end up seeing half-naked girls or full-on porn clips, then boom, relapse. I hadn’t removed the trigger.
Social media is softcore porn, plain and simple. Even YouTube sometimes has thumbnails that mess with your brain. That’s why I say something that barely any creator does, I actually want you to stop watching me eventually. Don’t become a consumer. Become a creator. There’s no value in endlessly consuming.
And yeah, I’m biased, I truly believe my content is some of the most helpful on the internet. But the point is: consumption is destroying your focus, your masculinity, your discipline. Be the guy who deletes all that shit.
Be the weird guy who doesn’t use Instagram.
Grayscale your phone.
Turn off notifications.
Become remarkable by being disciplined and offline.
STEP 2: DELETE DATING APPS.
Back in Thailand in 2022, I downloaded Tinder just to have fun and ended up spending hours just rotating between apps: Tinder, Bumble, Hinge. Messaging girls nonstop. It became a full-time job. And the energy I felt from those apps? Dirty. Degenerate. Empty.
Some guys can use dating apps properly. I can’t. My pictures are top-tier, I get 100s of MATCHES (not just likes) a day. But it pulls me into this lustful vortex. Even recently, I downloaded Bumble again, and within days, I was back in that low-energy, soul-draining state.
The truth is the girls on those apps are low-quality. Yes, I know how that sounds. But I’ve had enough experience to say that confidently. The wholesome, cute girls, the ones you actually want to build something real with aren’t hanging around Tinder looking to hook up. You meet them at the gym, at wholesome places like a Church, in real life.
There’s something pure about meeting a girl in person, where you lock eyes, you both smile, and it just flows naturally. That doesn’t happen on a screen. You’re not Uber Eats ordering a hookup. You’re supposed to meet women the real way. Like your father did and all his fathers before him.
If you’re still on those apps, stop lying to yourself. “Oh, I’ll just message this one girl then delete it.” That's the fat guy mentality. That’s like saying, “Let me eat this last slice of chocolate cake, then I’ll start my diet tomorrow.” No. The diet starts now.
Just go to the gym and talk to a girl.
Or a health club/spa.
Or, if you’ve got the resources, move to Bali. I’m not joking. Canggu is full of high-vibe, feminine, self-improvement girls. I’m not selling you a dream. I live it. Girls will literally smile at you just for being in a good mood. They value a man who's masculine and hard working. You don’t need dating apps when you’re in a place like that.
These apps are a cancer on your mental health. If you respect yourself, delete them right now.
STEP 3: FILL THE VACUUM WITH SOMETHING MEANINGFUL.
You’ll have extra time now that you’re not gooning for hours.
What should you do with it?
Start a business.
That was a major game-changer for me. Become a content creator. Build something. I have another YouTube channel called Hamza Advanced where I teach this. When you have a business, suddenly your time has value. Your brain shifts. You stop pedestalling women, and you start pedestalling your own mission.
Suddenly, you’re more attractive to women, too. And guess what? That also reduces your urges. Your new obsession becomes progress, not pleasure.
Or, just go workout twice a day. Why the fuck not?
We’ve been conditioned to think one workout a day is enough. That’s BS. Every elite athlete trains multiple times a day. Go lift weights in the morning, then hit cardio in the evening. Go to a mobility or yoga class. Stay at the gym all day. Journal there. Eat there. Work from your laptop there.
Especially if jacking off is the biggest problem in your life right now, then anything else is better. Get up, leave the house, move your body. Your future self will thank you.
STEP 4: WHEN THE URGE HITS, MOVE PHYSICALLY.
Forget the “just breathe deeply” advice. It never worked for me.
What actually worked was noticing where I was when the urge hit. Usually it’s your bed, your desk, your “gooning zone.” The trick? Move with aggression. Don’t sit there thinking, “Let me fight this urge.” Stand the fuck up and leave the room. Go outside. Go to the gym. Go on a walk. Just move.
You’ll never regret walking around your neighbourhood at midnight looking at the stars to resist an urge. But you will regret relapsing and feeling like a piece of shit the next morning.
The reason why two-a-day training is so effective isn’t just the physical aspect, it’s more that it forces you to keep busy, to be productive. You avoid the time and location traps where you’d normally relapse. The more you move, the more you win.
That’s what worked for me. Not fancy tips. Not a 3 minute TikTok vid. Just real, raw action.
Do the hard work, especially when you don’t feel like it.
1 week ago | [YT] | 2,808
View 103 replies
Hamza
the big problem when you start attracting girls
If you want to attract more girls, it’s not about money, cold approaching, or using dating apps. It’s self-improvement, what I’ve been preaching all these years. You build yourself up in every single area: physically, mentally, emotionally, socially. You hit the gym, you meditate, you eat clean, you reduce screen time, you become disciplined and wholesome. You don’t do this for girls, you do it because it turns you into a man of value.
But here’s where the trap starts. I call it the Self-Improvement Relationship Trap.
You begin to level up. Maybe you used to be a 4/10 in those cringe rating scales, and now you’re a 5.5 or even a 6. So now more girls are into you. But what most guys don’t realize is these girls aren’t worth your time or effort. They’re low quality, the type who vape, party, eat shit food, never exercise, and spend their nights scrolling on social media.
And because you’re still early in your self-improvement journey you don’t realize your value yet. So you fall for the first girl who shows you a bit of attraction. That’s the trap. You settle way too early. You lock in a toxic relationship with someone who’s not growing with you. And guess what happens? Three to six months later, you’ve improved again. You’re leaner, stronger, wiser. But she’s still stuck in the same degenerate habits. She still wants to go clubbing and get pissed drunk. You start feeling that uncomfortable, hard-to-admit truth: “I’m actually far better than her.”
I’ve been there. I've dated girls who I thought were amazing just because they were into me. But in reality they were holding me back. One girl was basically a degen, addicted to partying and alcohol. Another just wanted to smoke weed and do nothing all day. They weren't evil, they just didn’t care about being on a meaningful path in life. And being around them made me worse. I skipped workouts. I stayed up late. I drank and smoked weed. That’s what happens when you get close to people who aren’t on self-improvement: you become exactly like them.
Do you ever notice how disciplined you become when you’re alone and focused? Sleeping early, hitting the gym, eating clean. But spend a few nights with someone who doesn’t care about any of that, and your whole system gets derailed. That’s not a coincidence. It’s a psychological law: you are the average of the people you spend time with.
So when guys say, “Oh I’ll just stay disciplined even if my girlfriend isn’t,” they’re coping. If she vapes, drinks, does drugs, doom scrolls all day, and treats your self-improvement like a quirky hobby instead of respecting it, you’ll start slipping. Slowly. Without even realizing.
And that’s dangerous. Because your progress will slow down. You’ll stagnate. And while you’re plateauing, the alternate version of you that didn’t get into that shit relationship is speeding ahead. He’s building a better life. He’s unlocking a higher quality of women every 6 months. Not just in looks, but in energy, habits, values.
That’s the difference. You’re on this wild path of levelling up, but most people aren’t. So if you settle now, you're literally cashing out early. Like buying Bitcoin at $3k and selling at $5k just because you're too excited at the slightest hint of profit. You should be stoic and holding because YOU are the asset. And you're going to become far more valuable as time goes on.
That’s the male advantage. As men, we become more attractive with age as long as we stay on self-improvement. Women are usually attracted to traits that take ages to develop: discipline, finances, leadership, calmness, emotional maturity. But most guys don’t capitalize on that. They waste their 20s and 30s drinking, gaming, and being lazy. That’s why most 40-year-old men repulse women.
But you? If you stay on this path, sunlight in the morning, lifting heavy, eating clean, leading, healing, you’re going to be in your prime in your 20s and 30s. You’ll be lean, muscular, financially secure, experienced, and wise. You’ll have depth. And that means you’ll attract wife quality women on a completely different level than the ones hitting you up right now.
I’m not saying be alone forever. If you meet a high-quality woman who’s also on self-improvement, who respects your goals, trains, eats clean, reads, is feminine, disciplined, wholesome, then lock her down lol. That’s a black swan. Super rare but possible. Most of the time though, what you’re seeing right now is just lust disguised as love. You’re craving validation. You’re getting a bit of female attention for the first time in your life, and it feels good.
But that doesn’t mean you should settle. Don’t sacrifice your mission for a 6/10 who vapes and Snapchats other guys. Don’t fall into this trap just because you're horny or lonely. If you're going to build something amazing with someone, let it be with someone worthy, someone who pushes you to become the best version of yourself.
You need to have standards. Not the Instagram kind. I’m talking about internal standards like what you accept into your life. Because the truth is, you will become like the person you date. So ask yourself: do I want to become like her? Does she sharpen me or dull me?
This is your life. You have the opportunity to become one of the rare men who actually ascends. Who becomes the top 1%. Who attracts an amazing woman and lives an amazing life. But that only happens if you’re willing to say no to everything that slows you down.
So for now, stay on the path. Build your body. Build your mind. Build your life. Talk to quality girls, be social, get experience, but don’t commit until you meet someone who’s genuinely high quality. Don’t give in to feelings for a degenerate just because she’s the only one who likes you today. You’re becoming something greater. Act like it.
Do the hard work especially when you don’t feel like it.
2 weeks ago | [YT] | 4,435
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Hamza
my no bs advice for guys wanting to become top 1%
You’re the most ugly, undisciplined, poorest version of yourself right now. So it’s no surprise you’re only able to attract ugly, braindead, loser girls.
Girls are attracted to you based on your Sexual Market Value:
- Aesthetics (height, face, physique)
- Personality (are you bitch boy, or a dominant action taker)
- Wealth (are you a 9 to 5 wage-cuck, or building your own business)
- Social circle (do you have high class friends, or are you surrounded by Jeffrey losers)
Your SMV increases with age as long as you’re working hard on self improvement. In a few years time you’ll attract much higher quality girls because they see you as 100x desirable than the average cummy stains on pants guy.
A very powerful way to boost how people see you is to be part of a masculine brotherhood with high quality men. You’ll keep each other accountable and love working on your self improvement together. They’ll support you in becoming the best version of yourself, not hold you down like your current loser Discord/video gamer friends do.
Your current friends might go to the gym but they still do all the dirty degenerate habits that repulse you, like jacking off, eating shit, no desire to make money through their own business. How can you ever be seen as a top tier man when all your friends have literally zero SMV?
The simplest way for you to find high tier guys on self improvement is to see if they’re my followers. Because if they are, then you know they watch and follow what I say in my videos, and take self improvement seriously.
They want to achieve supreme health, build a successful business, and date a beautiful feminine girl.
My final advice is to make sure you work hard on achieving your goals of getting rich in your 20s. Otherwise you’ll just end up as a peasant working in a soulless minimum wage job, hoping to retire when you’re 60. Throw yourself in the fast lane and build your own business. I did, and I made $1m profit (not just revenue) in my first year.
If you’ve got no soul and are fine with being a cancer on society go pursue the bullshit all the influencers promote, like dropshipping, OnlyFans managing and NFT/Bitcoin. You’ll end up broke anyway, and you’ll deserve it for being such a retard to believe those liars.
But if you have more than a double digit IQ just do the exact same business model as me: make educational content, then sell a high quality product to your followers. You know it works because it's literally what I'm doing to this day.
You don’t need a university degree or commit to a life of boredom and depression like you would with normal jobs. Your work will be very purposeful; you’ll genuinely be changing the lives of your fans and customers, and making a ton of money.
If you’re not a pussy bitch, take action right now.
3 weeks ago | [YT] | 1,675
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Hamza
training 2 hours a day, 6 days a week with a pro fighter coach
same meals every single day of the week
9pm bedtime 100% of the nights this month
no alcohol, no dating, no distraction
looking for opponent for my first fight on March 8th
this gritty lifestyle what I needed. Hope to see you living like this too.
Reminds me of the good old days back in 2020 - 2021
1 month ago | [YT] | 502
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