"Salt air, and the rust on your door I never needed anything more Whispers of, "Are you sure?" "Never have I ever before" But I can see us lost in the memory August slipped away into a moment in time 'Cause it was never mine And I can see us twisted in bedsheets August sipped away like a bottle of wine 'Cause you were never mine Your back beneath the sun Wishin' I could write my name on it Will you call when you're back at school? I remember thinkin' I had you But I can see us lost in the memory August slipped away into a moment in time 'Cause it was never mine And I can see us twisted in bedsheets August sipped away like a bottle of wine 'Cause you were never mine Back when we were still changin' for the better Wanting was enough For me, it was enough To live for the hope of it all Cancel plans just in case you'd call And say you meet me behind the mall So much for summer love and saying, "Us" 'Cause you weren't mine to lose You weren't mine to lose, no But I can see us lost in the memory August slipped away into a moment in time 'Cause it was never mine And I can see us twisted in bedsheets August sipped away like a bottle of wine 'Cause you were never mine 'Cause you were never mine, never mine But do you remember? Remember when I pulled up, and said, "Get in the car" And then canceled my plans, just in case you'd call Back when I was livin' for the hope of it all, for the hope of it all "Meet me behind the mall" (Remember when I pulled up and said "Get in the car") (And then canceled my plans, just in case you'd call?) (Back when I was livin' for the hope of it all, for the hope of it all) ("Meet me behind the mall") Remember when I pulled up, and said, "Get in the car" And then canceled my plans, just in case you'd call Back when I was livin' for the hope of it all (for the hope of it all) For the hope of it all, for the hope of it all (For the hope of it all, for the hope of it all)"
Nobody understands what it is like to grow up without a father. Nobody knows what it's like when the father's birthday comes along and you're all moody and everyone is mad at you for it. Nobody knows what it's like when you are the only one who cares to celebrate your father on his birthday. Nobody knows what it's like to celebrate everyone else's fathers on father's day but not your own. Nobody knows what it's like to hear everyone talk about how their fathers "almost" died when yours is really dead. Nobody knows what it's like when your birthday comes along and that's how you know how long it's been because he died just months from your 1st birthday. Nobody knows what it's like to pretend you're okay when someone talks about their father when you're not. Nobody knows what it's like to talk to a picture every night before bed. Nobody knows just how much that ring means to me. Nobody understands me. Nobody knows. Nobody could ever care. Nobody.
Starting my YouTube channel last summer changed my life. I was going through a lot and needed something to distract me so I started making edits. They weren't good edits but they were edits. Now I'm not going through as much and stuff like friend drama is over. I proceeded to quit this channel because I started to feel an overload of stress mixing my channel and school together. Homework started piling up and I didn't have time left in my day for what I wanted. Now that we're coming up on the last few months of school I realize something... This channel has been a big part of my school year. Being able to rant whenever I needed and having people who would just read and give their opinions has been amazing. It's not like I don't like making edits it's that if I'm on a schedule or feel as though I have to make them I get overwhelmed and I can't do it. After quitting YouTube I constantly found myself going back to my channel wishing I never quit. Recently in Health we have been talking about stress and anxiety and I realized that maybe it was a good thing that I quit. In no means am I saying I'm ever coming back because I can not handle making edits, posting them, replying to comments, and trying to do stuff in my personal life. As you may know I was supposed to go to a summer camp last summer but I left early due to anxiety and hatred. That was a camp for youth group and since then I have tried to go away with my youth group for just a weekend and that also didn't work out. I haven't been to my youth group that I've been going to for 3 years since February. As I start to take these little pieces of my life out I realize that I have a lot more free time and I can finally catch up on some schoolwork. I lost my streak of a 4.0 gpa last quarter by accident and I just learned that on Tuesday. Power school messed up my grades causing me to have an A- in Science even though my teacher confirmed Canvas was right and it was supposed to be an A. That really made me realize how important it is for me to focus on my schoolwork and keeping up and that quitting YouTube has been very beneficial towards that. I think something just clicked in me. I can't keep coming back to YouTube to make posts, edits, and get advice. I need to move on. I have made many friends this year to talk to and hangout with so I'll be focusing more on that. The only way I can get myself to fully stop logging back into this account is deleting YouTube. I guess this is my long way of telling you all that you will never hear from me again after this post is taken down. I'll schedule smt to post on August 15th just because of my birthday but other than that this is over. I'm done with YouTube. Thanks for being her on my journey but I will officially be ending it today.
Should I come back for the month of March? (I'm debating it after taking some time off just because I have some edits that I've made on my own time that I kinda want to post idk tho. Even if it's a yes I still may not come back for March tho)
Ali_In_Wonderland
Ali_In_Wonderland
So I lwk started highschool today and it kinda sucks, yk? It's okay tho 😝
5 days ago | [YT] | 0
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Ali_In_Wonderland
Happy golden birthday to...
ME!!
"Cause when you're FIFTEEN"
Let's frickin gooooooooooo
I didn't realize I already scheduled a post for today but idc!!!!!! I'm so excited!!!!!!!
3 weeks ago | [YT] | 0
View 1 reply
Ali_In_Wonderland
It's my birthday!!! I may not have YouTube rn but I love b-day wishes if you have some <3
Lol.
3 weeks ago | [YT] | 1
View 1 reply
Ali_In_Wonderland
Already pre ordered the CD and Poster ❤️
4 weeks ago | [YT] | 3
View 0 replies
Ali_In_Wonderland
"Salt air, and the rust on your door
I never needed anything more
Whispers of, "Are you sure?"
"Never have I ever before"
But I can see us lost in the memory
August slipped away into a moment in time
'Cause it was never mine
And I can see us twisted in bedsheets
August sipped away like a bottle of wine
'Cause you were never mine
Your back beneath the sun
Wishin' I could write my name on it
Will you call when you're back at school?
I remember thinkin' I had you
But I can see us lost in the memory
August slipped away into a moment in time
'Cause it was never mine
And I can see us twisted in bedsheets
August sipped away like a bottle of wine
'Cause you were never mine
Back when we were still changin' for the better
Wanting was enough
For me, it was enough
To live for the hope of it all
Cancel plans just in case you'd call
And say you meet me behind the mall
So much for summer love and saying, "Us"
'Cause you weren't mine to lose
You weren't mine to lose, no
But I can see us lost in the memory
August slipped away into a moment in time
'Cause it was never mine
And I can see us twisted in bedsheets
August sipped away like a bottle of wine
'Cause you were never mine
'Cause you were never mine, never mine
But do you remember?
Remember when I pulled up, and said, "Get in the car"
And then canceled my plans, just in case you'd call
Back when I was livin' for the hope of it all, for the hope of it all
"Meet me behind the mall"
(Remember when I pulled up and said "Get in the car")
(And then canceled my plans, just in case you'd call?)
(Back when I was livin' for the hope of it all, for the hope of it all)
("Meet me behind the mall")
Remember when I pulled up, and said, "Get in the car"
And then canceled my plans, just in case you'd call
Back when I was livin' for the hope of it all (for the hope of it all)
For the hope of it all, for the hope of it all
(For the hope of it all, for the hope of it all)"
1 month ago | [YT] | 0
View 2 replies
Ali_In_Wonderland
Nobody understands what it is like to grow up without a father.
Nobody knows what it's like when the father's birthday comes along and you're all moody and everyone is mad at you for it.
Nobody knows what it's like when you are the only one who cares to celebrate your father on his birthday.
Nobody knows what it's like to celebrate everyone else's fathers on father's day but not your own.
Nobody knows what it's like to hear everyone talk about how their fathers "almost" died when yours is really dead.
Nobody knows what it's like when your birthday comes along and that's how you know how long it's been because he died just months from your 1st birthday.
Nobody knows what it's like to pretend you're okay when someone talks about their father when you're not.
Nobody knows what it's like to talk to a picture every night before bed.
Nobody knows just how much that ring means to me.
Nobody understands me.
Nobody knows.
Nobody could ever care.
Nobody.
2 months ago | [YT] | 1
View 3 replies
Ali_In_Wonderland
Starting my YouTube channel last summer changed my life. I was going through a lot and needed something to distract me so I started making edits. They weren't good edits but they were edits. Now I'm not going through as much and stuff like friend drama is over. I proceeded to quit this channel because I started to feel an overload of stress mixing my channel and school together. Homework started piling up and I didn't have time left in my day for what I wanted. Now that we're coming up on the last few months of school I realize something...
This channel has been a big part of my school year. Being able to rant whenever I needed and having people who would just read and give their opinions has been amazing. It's not like I don't like making edits it's that if I'm on a schedule or feel as though I have to make them I get overwhelmed and I can't do it. After quitting YouTube I constantly found myself going back to my channel wishing I never quit.
Recently in Health we have been talking about stress and anxiety and I realized that maybe it was a good thing that I quit. In no means am I saying I'm ever coming back because I can not handle making edits, posting them, replying to comments, and trying to do stuff in my personal life. As you may know I was supposed to go to a summer camp last summer but I left early due to anxiety and hatred. That was a camp for youth group and since then I have tried to go away with my youth group for just a weekend and that also didn't work out. I haven't been to my youth group that I've been going to for 3 years since February. As I start to take these little pieces of my life out I realize that I have a lot more free time and I can finally catch up on some schoolwork.
I lost my streak of a 4.0 gpa last quarter by accident and I just learned that on Tuesday. Power school messed up my grades causing me to have an A- in Science even though my teacher confirmed Canvas was right and it was supposed to be an A. That really made me realize how important it is for me to focus on my schoolwork and keeping up and that quitting YouTube has been very beneficial towards that. I think something just clicked in me.
I can't keep coming back to YouTube to make posts, edits, and get advice. I need to move on. I have made many friends this year to talk to and hangout with so I'll be focusing more on that. The only way I can get myself to fully stop logging back into this account is deleting YouTube.
I guess this is my long way of telling you all that you will never hear from me again after this post is taken down. I'll schedule smt to post on August 15th just because of my birthday but other than that this is over. I'm done with YouTube. Thanks for being her on my journey but I will officially be ending it today.
Love you all ❤️
@LaineysWildhorses
4 months ago (edited) | [YT] | 1
View 1 reply
Ali_In_Wonderland
I need a friend who I can text whenever and who is my age and understands me but I don't have one...
Question: Can I rant?
4 months ago | [YT] | 2
View 1 reply
Ali_In_Wonderland
"Those are all wishes, my dream is to be gone..."
6 months ago | [YT] | 2
View 0 replies
Ali_In_Wonderland
Should I come back for the month of March?
(I'm debating it after taking some time off just because I have some edits that I've made on my own time that I kinda want to post idk tho. Even if it's a yes I still may not come back for March tho)
7 months ago | [YT] | 1
View 0 replies
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