The Karate Shrimp

The last decade has been the most transformative of my life. My mom got cancer. I started martial arts out of desperation, out of pain, out of grief. I found myself again, found my strength and sense of humour. I challenged myself despite my fears. I started competing as a white belt. I pushed myself harder than I've ever pushed myself in my life. I found the strength to leave a lonely marriage. I struggled. I trained religiously. I sparred hard. I got stronger. I lost my mom to a second cancer. I swallowed my anger over medical malpractice. Swallowed my rage over a funeral home taking her body without authorization, holding her hostage, reducing my beautiful mother to a commodity. To leverage. When all I wanted to do was break down and grieve.

I didn't want to keep going, but somehow did. Through dealing with harassment from a stalker at a dojo that had once been a refuge. Through a falling out with a Sensei who turned a safe space into an incredibly toxic environment. Through an ugly, costly divorce. Through long covid. Through burnout. Through it all. There for my kids in their grief, over losing their Oma, over being kicked out by their father. I kept fucking going. I kept training. I kept showing up. I cried when I couldn't hold back, and I should probably have cried more. I lost hope, but I kept going. I kept going. I KEEP going.

Some days I don't know how I do it. Stubbornness, probably. My self-deprecating sense of humour helps, no doubt. Life is absurd, after all. So I lean into that. Play with that. Show up because of that. If I can train, I'll be okay. If I can laugh, I'll get through it. I may not want to at times, and I may feel incapable at others, but I can do it. So I do.

This online thing is weird. I'm doing it for you, but mostly I'm doing it for me. It's an outlet, just as my training has been. It frees me in some strange way to be unapologetically me, despite what my haters might think of that. And they make it clear that they feel threatened by it, and are angry. And that's okay. The trolls are struggling too.

I'm going to keep going and keep being me. Despite it all, and despite them. And sometimes, maybe even because of them. ❤

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2 weeks ago | [YT] | 89

The Karate Shrimp

I'm in your DMs like....

Day 2 of using shared reels as a writing prompt. I'm rather enjoying this new ritual.

Be sure to follow on IG.

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2 weeks ago | [YT] | 85

The Karate Shrimp

This is how I'm responding to DMs of reels and memes henceforth and forthwith. Include me in your doomscroll sharing and be blessed with the gift of my exhaustion-fueled creativity. I will respond with questionably poetic ramblings; I will screenshot; I will share. My heart will, once again, feel full, and the world will, at long last, be whole.

You're very welcome.

#nofap😡

(Full post on IG)

Note: I accept DMs exclusively on IG. Follow me there for more unhinged content. Thanks in advance.

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2 weeks ago | [YT] | 70

The Karate Shrimp

Martial arts influencer shii

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1 month ago | [YT] | 160

The Karate Shrimp

I feel so honoured to have been welcomed as a guest on the Whistlekick podcast. Jeremy is an amazing host. 🙏 It went so well! Check it out via the links below.

Listen to the podcast episode here: www.whistlekickmartialartsradio.com/

Watch the video version here: youtube.com/@whistlekick

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1 month ago | [YT] | 50

The Karate Shrimp

This is fiddy. Feel free to watch allll my videos as a bday present for me. TIA.

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5 months ago | [YT] | 183

The Karate Shrimp

Hope you're enjoying the habit challenge so far!

Watch the whole challenge here: www.youtube.com/playlist?list...

6 months ago | [YT] | 62

The Karate Shrimp

Ignore the self-judgement and just get started.

https://youtu.be/lfgAYZv4r_s

6 months ago | [YT] | 24

The Karate Shrimp

I think of uncertainty as a gift. When I feel uncertain, it’s a sign that I am making a huge change in my life. A sign that I’m taking a risk and moving out of my comfort zone. A sign that I’m doing something difficult and worthwhile. Whether or not I succeed… that’s a totally different thing. BUT I no longer let uncertainty stop me from pursuing something I value.

https://youtu.be/XvCwSnSicEo

6 months ago | [YT] | 15

The Karate Shrimp

Compassion and empathy, always.

https://youtu.be/3_Jj7CNN16k

6 months ago | [YT] | 35