Confident Parents, Capable Kids by ADHD Dude

5 days ago | [YT] | 18

Confident Parents, Capable Kids by ADHD Dude

Many families of children with ADHD naturally fall into a dynamic where they perceive their child as fragile and much less capable than they are. This misperception of their child's capacity for growth results in "high giving/low expectations," which is where parents give and give and expect little to nothing in return in terms of behavior, emotional regulation, helping around the house, or how family members should be treated.

Having low expectations of your child may feel compassionate. However, it does not help your child feel useful or give them a sense of purpose, two things that are critical for the ADHD brain, even when they complain, argue, or are oppositional.

High empathy and high expectations are not opposites; they work together. When you have both in place, things will improve at home.

That is what the Creating Daily Expectations, the 2nd part of our Parent Behavior Training sequence, teaches parents - how to lovingly step into your parental authority so your child can begin to learn how capable they are, while their behavior, cooperation, and emotional regulation improve.

𝗪𝗮𝘁𝗰𝗵 𝗮 𝗳𝗿𝗲𝗲 𝘄𝗲𝗯𝗶𝗻𝗮𝗿 𝘁𝗼 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗻 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝘁𝗼 𝗶𝗺𝗽𝗹𝗲𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗱𝗮𝗶𝗹𝘆 𝗲𝘅𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗶𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗲, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗾𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗼 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗰𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗹𝘆 𝘂𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗔𝗗𝗛𝗗 𝗗𝘂𝗱𝗲 𝗣𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗕𝗲𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗶𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗿𝗮𝗶𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴.

Watch the free webinar here: www.adhddude.com/get-creating-daily-expectations-w…

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1 week ago | [YT] | 49

Confident Parents, Capable Kids by ADHD Dude

Click the link below to access the free webinar that you can watch at your convenience:

www.adhddude.com/get-creating-daily-expectations-w…

1 week ago | [YT] | 14

Confident Parents, Capable Kids by ADHD Dude

Often, well-meaning parenting advice that parents of children with ADHD receive sounds compassionate and helpful, and it actually makes behavior worse. Not because you're doing anything wrong, but because the advice is not aligned with how the ADHD brain operates.

1 week ago | [YT] | 9

Confident Parents, Capable Kids by ADHD Dude

Parenting a child with ADHD is genuinely hard, and the calm, consistent advice you keep hearing has not helped your child develop better emotional regulation skills or reduced their blow-ups. If you feel worn down and unsure what to try next, that makes complete sense.

It is more common than you think for parents to gradually and unintentionally lose their parental authority. It happens through parental accommodation: changing your own behavior to prevent your child from getting angry or upset.

It develops naturally, out of an understandable wish to keep the peace. Here are some examples of what it looks like:
-Doing things for them that they're capable of doing on their own to avoid arguments or complaints
-Allowing extra screen time to avoid meltdowns
-Avoiding saying "no" and letting them have their way to prevent aggression or blow-ups
-Giving privileges regardless of behavior or cooperation
-Constantly negotiating because you want them to approve your parenting decisions
-Giving into learned helplessness and emotional blackmail

Each choice on its own is small and understandable. Over time, though, this erodes parental authority, and kids learn that controlling their home through their behaviors is effective. That is when Severe Tyrannical Behaviors can appear, like property destruction, physical aggression towards family members, threats of self-harm, or running away.

Here is what hands your authority back: the behavior is not where change begins. Your response is. As you reduce accommodation and step back into the role of the parent in charge, your child begins to feel safer, cooperate more, and discover how capable they truly are.

Left alone, the pattern only deepens. Faced directly, severe tyrannical behaviors can be stopped or significantly reduced. Do not trade tomorrow's independence for today's peace.

The ADHD Dude Parent Behavior Training sequence shows you how:
Capable & Confident [ages 4-7]
Scaffolding Better Behavior [ages 8 and up]
Creating Daily Expectations [courses based on age]

Start your parent training today at ADHDDude.com.

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1 week ago | [YT] | 40

Confident Parents, Capable Kids by ADHD Dude

𝘈𝘋𝘏𝘋 𝘋𝘶𝘥𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘢 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘣𝘰𝘺𝘴. 𝘙𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘭𝘧 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘨𝘪𝘳𝘭𝘴, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘩𝘢𝘭𝘧 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱 𝘖𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘦 𝘏𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘨𝘪𝘳𝘭𝘴.

I decided to write this because I have spent most of my career working with boys with ADHD and their families, and because I have seen how easily normal male development can be misunderstood.

I am grateful to ADDitude for the opportunities they have given me over the years. That is part of why I felt obligated to respond to their recent article about “toxic masculinity.”

My concern is that the article is not practical ADHD guidance. It is cultural commentary that frames boys seeking confidence, discipline, friendship, and connection with other boys and men as possible warning signs.

For boys with ADHD who already struggle socially, that is especially unhelpful.

Many boys connect through shared interests, gaming, sports, humor, and time spent alongside one another. That may not resemble how many adult women experience friendship, but different does not mean unhealthy.

My concern is that the article frames normal male interests and boys’ need for connection with other boys and men as potential warning signs. That same kind of pathologizing would never be applied to girls in the same way. An article warning parents about “toxic femininity” would likely offend the publication’s largely female readership, and rightly so. Boys should be given the same consideration.

Parents do not need another reason to fear what their sons might become. They need help understanding what their sons are looking for and how to guide them toward healthy connection, purpose, and community.

Read here: www.adhddude.com/blog/stop-pathologizing-boys-adhd…

2 weeks ago | [YT] | 44

Confident Parents, Capable Kids by ADHD Dude

Slides from our upcoming free webinar on Creating Daily Expectations. The link to receive this free webinar will be available this upcoming week.

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2 weeks ago | [YT] | 24

Confident Parents, Capable Kids by ADHD Dude

If you've been told over and over that more patience, more understanding, more empathy is the answer for your child's big feelings, you've probably tried it every single day, even when it left you running on empty.

Walking on eggshells to avoid arguments and meltdowns is exhausting, and it shows up in small, well-intentioned decisions parents make every day. Most loving parents don't realize it's happening.

Left unaddressed, this pattern means your child never gets the chance to build the emotional resilience, reciprocity, and respect for others that they need for a healthy adult life.

You can start putting expectations back in place and holding your child to them. When you do, your child starts learning something different: that they're capable, that expectations aren't punishment, and that respect goes both ways in your home.

When you're ready to improve behavior, emotional regulation, cooperation, and help your child learn how capable they are, the ADHD Dude Parent Behavior Training sequence for your child's age will provide you with a step by step plan.

2 weeks ago | [YT] | 4

Confident Parents, Capable Kids by ADHD Dude

3 weeks ago | [YT] | 11

Confident Parents, Capable Kids by ADHD Dude

The hardest part of raising a child with ADHD is often what happens at home: the arguing, the meltdowns, the refusal to cooperate, the sibling fighting. It is exhausting, and most of the advice parents are given never addresses why it keeps happening.

The most common thread behind these struggles is almost always the same: there are no clear, specific daily expectations in place for the child to earn their "currency."

Currency is the privileges you provide your child that should be earned rather than treated as entitlements. For younger children, it might be a special toy that only comes out at certain times, or an extra game at night. For teens, it might be phone or internet access.

In the Confident Parents, Capable Kids Method, currency is earned several times throughout the day for meeting daily expectations. There is no "one and done." Your child gets multiple opportunities. And there is no reactive language, no threats of punishment, no "you lost screen time." Instead, you use language of accountability so your child learns to own their choices.

Daily expectations are split between helping around the house and behavior and cooperation.

These worksheets come from Creating Daily Expectations, the second part of our Parent Behavior Training sequence. There are three versions, based on your child's age.

Your child's behavior at home will not improve from therapy, from more validating feelings, or from more punishment. 𝗜𝘁 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗶𝗺𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗮 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝘂𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲𝗱 𝗽𝗹𝗮𝗻 𝗶𝗻 𝗽𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗲, 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗱 𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗴𝗻𝗶𝘇𝗲 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝗰𝗮𝗽𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗮𝗿𝗲, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗿𝗶𝘃𝗶𝗹𝗲𝗴𝗲𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘃𝗶𝗱𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝘁𝗹𝗲𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀; 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗱 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗺𝗲𝗲𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗲𝘅𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀.

𝗖𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗗𝗮𝗶𝗹𝘆 𝗘𝘅𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 will help you get there.

Start your Parent Behavior Training today at ADHDDude.com. See less

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3 weeks ago | [YT] | 17