Lewis Howes

Brad Beeler spent 25 years in the Secret Service. He says most people can't tell when someone is lying to them.

Could you tell if someone you love was lying to you? 👇

10 hours ago | [YT] | 171

Lewis Howes

People tell you the truth when they feel safe. And one raised eyebrow can shut them down.

Brad Beeler spent 25 years as a US Secret Service agent and 17 as a polygraph examiner. In that time, he got a couple thousand people to open up about the worst things they had ever done.

His rule is simple: never punish the disclosure. He once watched a suspect go silent the second a flash of contempt crossed his own face.

And here's what surprised me most. When it comes to spotting lies, people get it right only 54% of the time. Barely better than a coin flip. Body language won't tell you who's lying, but it will tell you how comfortable someone is. Brad treats every cue like a check engine light, something to follow up on later, not a verdict.

He also shared the cases he got wrong, including the day he fixated on a 6 foot 4 biker while the quiet man in front of him kept saying "that's not it." Those mistakes became his book, Tell Me Everything.

But the moment that stayed with me was when we talked about using this at home. Swap "why did you do that" for "help me understand." Give the other person an off-ramp to save face. I admitted how hard that is when someone has hurt you. And Brad admitted he lost his cool with his own son's coach.

In that moment, we weren't just talking about getting people to open up. We were doing it.

We spoke about:

- Why spotting lies from body language barely beats a coin flip, and what to watch instead
- How to create a judgment-free environment that makes people feel safe telling you the truth
- The Buddy framework for giving someone an off-ramp to confess without excusing what they did
- Brad's FEEL method for building instant rapport: family, education, employment, leisure
- Treating first impressions as a hypothesis so horns and halos stop steering you wrong
- How to keep your face from flashing contempt and shutting down a hard disclosure

After this conversation, I'll never ask "why did you do that?" the same way again.

Think of one hard conversation you've been avoiding. Then go into it with curiosity instead of judgment, and say "help me understand."

You might be surprised how much people are willing to tell you.

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1 2 3

12 hours ago | [YT] | 113

Lewis Howes

He spent 25 years in the Secret Service getting people to tell the truth. The hardest truth to admit? That you need help. New episode with Brad Beeler is out now!
https://youtu.be/TUbdHLxYaDw

14 hours ago | [YT] | 425

Lewis Howes

Home isn't always a place, but the special people who make you feel safe wherever you are.

1 day ago | [YT] | 9,156

Lewis Howes

Live according to your own values rather than societal expectations.

1 day ago | [YT] | 18,117

Lewis Howes

Make choices today that your future self will look back on with pride.

1 day ago | [YT] | 8,778

Lewis Howes

Terry Bradshaw says he won four Super Bowls while being afraid of losing every single game.

What fear holds you back the most? 👇

2 days ago | [YT] | 232

Lewis Howes

You can win four Super Bowls and still spend every game afraid of losing.

Terry Bradshaw is a Pro Football Hall of Fame quarterback and the longtime host of Fox NFL Sunday. And he told me he was never confident as an NFL quarterback. Not once.

Fear cost him his throwing motion. He completed just 51.9% of his passes. And underneath it all were the words his mother said to him when he was eight years old: you'll never amount to anything.

In his memoir Looking for Terry, he writes about the things most legends never admit. Depression. ADHD he didn't learn about until after football. Three divorces.

But the moment that stayed with me was when he talked about the day it finally hit him that the common factor in all three marriages was him.

No excuses. No blame. Just a hard look in the mirror, three years of counseling, and the courage to change. Today he's married to his best friend, a woman who makes him talk about the things he'd rather bury.

We spoke about:

- How to turn childhood criticism and harsh coaching into fuel instead of letting it define you
- Breaking the relationship pattern that repeats until you admit the common factor is you
- Mirror evaluation, the self-honesty exercise Terry uses to see himself clearly without inflating or tearing himself down
- Why depression and ADD become manageable when you talk them out instead of hiding them
- Building a marriage grounded in friendship, where saying no is allowed and hard conversations happen
- Why he sobbed over his dog but not his mother, and how his faith held through cancer twice in one year
- Redefining greatness around kindness and hope instead of trophies or money

After this conversation, I'll never look at greatness the same way again.

Think of the fear you've been carrying quietly, and the help you've been putting off. Then take one honest step toward it this week.

You might be surprised how much lighter you feel.

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1 2 3

2 days ago | [YT] | 382

Lewis Howes

Keep putting in the work and trust that you will eventually reach your destination.

2 days ago | [YT] | 9,506

Lewis Howes

His mother told him he'd never amount to anything. He went on to win four Super Bowls, survive cancer twice, and learn the hard way what really matters. New episode with Terry Bradshaw is out now!
https://youtu.be/IH2V38-Kxs4?si=ty0ds...

2 days ago (edited) | [YT] | 630