Even if a human was mentally pushed to the brink of self destruction, it wouldn't last days among the fools starving for more content and drama to feed from.
I might dump some alt versions to my covers on the alt channel just for fun because I have like 2 other versions of my Outer Science cover from last year I haven't even posted yet. I've been trying to work on stuff on the side but I can't seem to find myself enjoying vocaloid tuning anymore.
It's all gotten really bad to the point where I just want to quit all together. The stress that originally caused me to take several steps back keeps coming back as trauma, constantly being reminded by other people or memories of what I fell victim to. If it was only recent memories I might be okay but it's also memories of 4 years ago and it's a time I wish to truly forget about.
I know it's kinda the rule of thumb to not post about this type of stuff on the internet but I feel that it's important for the few fans I have to know that; I am okay to an extent, I am seeking help when I need it, I will not do anything that'll put my life or anyone else in danger.
I have not forgotten about the other projects I have been working on, I've already let the people know that needed to know the status on said projects and left it at that. Eventually I'll get around to them but my number one most definitely priority is really focusing on myself and my mental health.
Been able to tune small medley sections but nothing beyond that. The burnout is slowly wearing off but it's just not enough to get me to go back to midi-ing or anything else other than that. I don't really have a desire to be active as a Vocalo-P currently.
seeing someone remake a cover i did 3 years ago only for it to get more views than mine in one day then the views i got over 3 years just makes me feel like what im doing is completely pointless. what's even the point in creating anymore? its not like anyone sees my work anyways. the only reason why im here is because im promoting myself in 25 different discord servers. i dont even think they care let alone instagram and tiktok... maybe i should quit
Going on an indefinite hiatus. Might be gone for a few months or might be gone for a year. Who knows. I need to take this time to focus on my mental and physical health. I also need to put more focus on my priorities such as a job or college. The less distractions and the less deadlines I have the better. Stay safe everyone!! 🙏🏻BLESS🙏🏻
Update I guess...? I don't think I'll be putting out a lot of content this year with MIKUEXPO coming up soon and some other events that have been happening in my life. I am not going to go into the details of what has been happening lately but it's unneccessary drama I don't want to involve anyone in. Please bear with me as I have a bunch of things on my plate that feel like the weight of the world on my shoulders. I really do hope you will all continue to support my journey.
PHaNToM-P (Alice Phantomhive)
Been working on some things on the side. I should have something to show in the coming days along with something for my birthday. Stay tuned I guess
2 weeks ago | [YT] | 2
View 0 replies
PHaNToM-P (Alice Phantomhive)
8/15 (maybe)
1 month ago | [YT] | 0
View 2 replies
PHaNToM-P (Alice Phantomhive)
Even if a human was mentally pushed to the brink of self destruction, it wouldn't last days among the fools starving for more content and drama to feed from.
2 months ago | [YT] | 2
View 0 replies
PHaNToM-P (Alice Phantomhive)
I might dump some alt versions to my covers on the alt channel just for fun because I have like 2 other versions of my Outer Science cover from last year I haven't even posted yet. I've been trying to work on stuff on the side but I can't seem to find myself enjoying vocaloid tuning anymore.
It's all gotten really bad to the point where I just want to quit all together. The stress that originally caused me to take several steps back keeps coming back as trauma, constantly being reminded by other people or memories of what I fell victim to. If it was only recent memories I might be okay but it's also memories of 4 years ago and it's a time I wish to truly forget about.
I know it's kinda the rule of thumb to not post about this type of stuff on the internet but I feel that it's important for the few fans I have to know that; I am okay to an extent, I am seeking help when I need it, I will not do anything that'll put my life or anyone else in danger.
I have not forgotten about the other projects I have been working on, I've already let the people know that needed to know the status on said projects and left it at that. Eventually I'll get around to them but my number one most definitely priority is really focusing on myself and my mental health.
🙏🏻BLESS🙏🏻
3 months ago | [YT] | 5
View 3 replies
PHaNToM-P (Alice Phantomhive)
Been able to tune small medley sections but nothing beyond that. The burnout is slowly wearing off but it's just not enough to get me to go back to midi-ing or anything else other than that. I don't really have a desire to be active as a Vocalo-P currently.
3 months ago | [YT] | 0
View 0 replies
PHaNToM-P (Alice Phantomhive)
seeing someone remake a cover i did 3 years ago only for it to get more views than mine in one day then the views i got over 3 years just makes me feel like what im doing is completely pointless. what's even the point in creating anymore? its not like anyone sees my work anyways. the only reason why im here is because im promoting myself in 25 different discord servers. i dont even think they care let alone instagram and tiktok... maybe i should quit
3 months ago | [YT] | 2
View 2 replies
PHaNToM-P (Alice Phantomhive)
really funny act you're pulling here crunchyroll because you delisted mekakucity actors YEARS ago so why now?? what the hell are you implying?
4 months ago | [YT] | 5
View 0 replies
PHaNToM-P (Alice Phantomhive)
Going on an indefinite hiatus. Might be gone for a few months or might be gone for a year. Who knows. I need to take this time to focus on my mental and physical health. I also need to put more focus on my priorities such as a job or college. The less distractions and the less deadlines I have the better. Stay safe everyone!! 🙏🏻BLESS🙏🏻
4 months ago | [YT] | 8
View 6 replies
PHaNToM-P (Alice Phantomhive)
Livetune tuning part 2: electric boogaloo. Thank you all for 700 subs! Won't let these love words end <3
4 months ago | [YT] | 1
View 0 replies
PHaNToM-P (Alice Phantomhive)
Update I guess...? I don't think I'll be putting out a lot of content this year with MIKUEXPO coming up soon and some other events that have been happening in my life. I am not going to go into the details of what has been happening lately but it's unneccessary drama I don't want to involve anyone in. Please bear with me as I have a bunch of things on my plate that feel like the weight of the world on my shoulders. I really do hope you will all continue to support my journey.
5 months ago | [YT] | 4
View 0 replies
Load more