Hi there. I'm not really sure what's compelling me to write this, but I just wanted to apologize for how I never actually did anything with this channel.
As the years went by, I felt increasingly anxious about the idea of making videos, because I was worried that nothing I made would ever be good enough, and I would just end up disappointing people. The expectations that I had set for myself had become so high that I couldn't possibly achieve them.
This is a very crappy mindset to have, and I wish I could've just snapped out of it a long time ago. I would love the ability to feel creative without any self-imposed pressure.
I'm also a pretty private person. Hell, even now, while writing this post, I'm having to strongly resist the urge to delete everything I just wrote and and disappear back into the void. It sucks, man.
I've had nothing but support and kindness from total strangers since the very beginning. I still get messages from people asking if I'm doing okay, which is nice. I wish I could've harnessed all of that positivity and friendliness as motivation, but it never worked, because regardless of the support, I simply didn't believe in myself.
I wish I could end this on a more positive note, but maybe the fact I'm even writing this in the first place is a good sign, as I would normally just keep it to myself.
I hope you're all staying safe this year, both physically and mentally.
DukeLovesYou
Hi there. I'm not really sure what's compelling me to write this, but I just wanted to apologize for how I never actually did anything with this channel.
As the years went by, I felt increasingly anxious about the idea of making videos, because I was worried that nothing I made would ever be good enough, and I would just end up disappointing people. The expectations that I had set for myself had become so high that I couldn't possibly achieve them.
This is a very crappy mindset to have, and I wish I could've just snapped out of it a long time ago. I would love the ability to feel creative without any self-imposed pressure.
I'm also a pretty private person. Hell, even now, while writing this post, I'm having to strongly resist the urge to delete everything I just wrote and and disappear back into the void. It sucks, man.
I've had nothing but support and kindness from total strangers since the very beginning. I still get messages from people asking if I'm doing okay, which is nice. I wish I could've harnessed all of that positivity and friendliness as motivation, but it never worked, because regardless of the support, I simply didn't believe in myself.
I wish I could end this on a more positive note, but maybe the fact I'm even writing this in the first place is a good sign, as I would normally just keep it to myself.
I hope you're all staying safe this year, both physically and mentally.
Thanks for taking the time to read this.
5 years ago | [YT] | 516
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